High School is Hell

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: BoMoWriCha Prompts
A response to a prompt posted on BoMoWriCha by Cheyjade. A short short piece of fiction. Demonic possession gone awry.

Submitted: October 23, 2018

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Submitted: October 23, 2018

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Balphagor couldn’t stop crying. Charles in AP English had called him fat. He flipped his curly red hair over one shoulder and adjusted his bra. Was it supposed to chafe like this? He absolutely wasn’t fat. Charles was an idiot. And Mrs. MacKinnon had called his essay trite and derivative. He’d been writing essays for thousands of years. Hell, he’d helped invent the essay as a particular form of torture. How ironic that everything had now come full circle back on him. Of course it was derivative. Everything was derivative. That was the whole point of an essay. To distill derived meaning.

Try explaining that to Mrs. MacKinnon though.

He stared hard at his C and considered how this was going to affect his end of the year G.P.A.

“Could this day get any worse?” Lots of people complained that God hated them. It was practically a throw-away line. But they were all wrong. God loved them and their little monkey souls. God did hate Balphagor though. He knew that for a fact.

“Who are you talking to, Val?”

Balphagor blinked rapidly. It took him a moment to remember that was his name now. Valerie Sullivan. And the person speaking was his best friend, Kim. The one that had insisted on playing with the Ouiji board in the first place because it would be fun. The one that had opened the door that had let him slip through into the mortal realm and slowly insinuate himself into Valerie’s psyche. The one that had accidentally spilt her pepsi and ruined the magic circle before the ritual had been properly completed trapping him here in the body of this seventeen year old high school senior.

Balphagor hated Kim. But right now he could really use a hug. And Kim gave great hugs.

“No one. Myself,” answered Balphagor.

“Don’t let Charles get to you. He’s a douche.”

“A big douche,” agreed Balphagor. He wasn’t 100% certain what a douche was but he was certain it wasn’t good.

“Think on the bright side; maybe he’ll catch fire.”

Balphagor nodded, “And fall down some stairs…”

“And get run over by a car…”

“And get eaten by badgers…”

“And made to go to a One Direction concert.”

They both laughed. And Kim gave him a hug. And he did feel better. Though he did wonder what this One Direction was that made them worse than getting eaten by badgers.


© Copyright 2018 Michael Porter. All rights reserved.

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