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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

I, Mansfield III am a cat of noble birth and as such, I have undertaken the great task of writing the biography of my my life. Therefore dear reader prepare yourself for psychological and cultural enrichment as this great tragedy... er I beg your pardon, this great Masterpiece, unfolds before your eyes.

I Mansfield III of Mansfield Estates do hereby bequeath... wait a minute that's a terrible beginning! It sounds like I'm writing my will! Please forgive me, dear reader, as I am rather new at this. Let's try that again.

I Mansfield III of Mansfield Estates do take pen in hand... No! No! No! How could I possibly take pen in hand when all I have are paws?

I suppose I should explain, my name is Mansfield III of...well, I suppose we've already covered that. I am a cat. The name was, in fact, an attempt at a joke
by Mr. Anthony Mansfield. You see I am the third cat of Mr. and Mrs. Mansfield and as Mr. Mansfield put it “three's a charm”, whatever that means (it must have something to do with my natural charisma).


Anyway, back to me, or rather almost back to me, my human or rather “the gentleman who owns my house”, Mr. Mansfield is a man of science and once he noticed my superior intellect he undertook the task of teaching me to speak. He clearly understood that by giving me the gift of speech he would be doing this world a great service. The man is clearly a genius. Er... as far as humans go you understand (I mean no offence to my human readers).

Since then he has taught me to read and write and I made the momentous decision to write about my life. I keep a personal diary to record daily events but I enjoyed writing about myself so much that I came to the conclusion that I must write a book. That way I could share my story with the world. What you hold in your hands dear reader, is the introductory prologue to what I am confident will be cherished for years to come, as a literary masterpiece. It will be my great gift to all of mankind.

Now, allow me to tell you a little bit about my home, there are vast parks, a stable and a pool, of course. The other animals present on the estate are, for the most part, quite sociable. There are the two guard dogs of Alsatian breed named Scott and Sophie (not my idea. I assure you). They are, as far as dogs go, quite companionable. However as I am a cat, I cannot be seen socializing with them in public.

Then there are the horses, rather a snobbish bunch, they hardly ever speak to anyone. Last but not least there is Adelaide, the groom's cat, her job is to keep rats and mice out of the barn. I would lend her a paw but as it is, it would be beneath my dignity to chase let alone eat small rodents.

(my stomach protests)

Silence stomach! You have no say in this matter.

(further protests)

Very well! I admit that at times I feel the strangest urge to chase mice. I can almost imagine it: zeroing in (I just learned that expression today, I'm so proud of myself), the pounce, the thrill of the chase, the final spring, the prey under myclaws and... and... WHAT AM I SAYING?

Forgive my moment of weakness dear reader, I don't know what came over me. The very idea of me eating mice, it's just too much. I mean could you imagine me, a cat of noble birth stooping to such a level? Still, I shall have to come up with some way to make myself appear to be busy when I visit Adelaide in the barn. It would be rather awkward if she is running about chasing mice while I sit trying to make witty conversation. Perhaps, I could point out the mice to her without chasing them myself? No good, I might give in to the temptation, chase one myself and what a horrible figure I would make. I can see where this will take some careful thought.

My apolgies, dear reader, I aseem to have gone off topic.

Well Dear Reader, I thank you for your attention. It has been a wonderful privilege for me to sit and tell you about myself and I trust that it has been a privilege for you to hear from me. Now as I said, this is merely the prologue to my book and I plan to get the story itself to my publisher post-haste! First,however, I must decide on an appropriate title for this great work. Wait! What's that smell? Grilled
Swordfish! My absolute favorite! In the joy of writing, I had quite forgotten about dinner. I must be off now but I look forward to meeting you again. Until next time and stay tuned for “Adventures in Mansfield's Parks”. Wow! I quite like that. Can you believe I just thought of it now?

Submitted: November 09, 2018

© Copyright 2021 Dan Holman. All rights reserved.

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