12 Months of Blue

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic

it started with pink sticky notes...it became something he'd never forget.

Table of Contents

August I


Was a poem worth it...?
Read Chapter

August II

I hope the coloring and alignment with the text messages doesn't bother you. I wanted to make them similar to ho... Read Chapter

September Part I

  There she goes, laughing her annoying head off. “Oh sorry Jem, it’s just funny.” She tease... Read Chapter

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Recent Comments

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C A Sechler

This is an intense starter, it flowed well and kept my interest throughout. You’ve done well starting this, I can’t wait to see what you do!

Sat, November 17th, 2018 5:38am

Author
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Thank you so much for reading and leaving this lovely comment.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 3:02pm

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MythyDragonwolf

Well I'll admit you've got a rather nice hook here. Got me wondering things, which I always find good. A few obvious ones like 'who and what is Blue', but saying that she was a mystery to the neighborhood also makes me wonder if she shows up to other people, or if that meant you asked around and no one knew.

Had nice pacing I think, started off a little intense but kept me going through as it slowed down. No big faults so far that I can find. But keep on writing, especially if you're enjoying writing for it! That's what I'm trying to do, keep writing what I want and try to improve as I go along, not get stuck on rewriting the same thing over and over.

So keep on going, you have a nice start here. :)

Sat, November 17th, 2018 1:52pm

Author
Reply

This comment really means a bunch. I honestly thought this first chapter was a little too slow paced so thank you for your kind review. I love constructive criticism the most so please don't hesitate to suggest something. I'm happy you took the time to read this and leave a sweet comment.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 3:06pm

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r futrell

Wonderful writing, very descriptive, put me in the space. I hope Jaden gets his. An intriguing way to bring the reader back wondering about Blue. Good job.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 4:57pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 3:07pm

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Joe Stuart

Hi Poetic. I am a long way from being a young adult but I think this story will appeal to readers of any age. I thought you were good when I read your work for the first time back in 2014. This is so much better. I don't usually read novels because I prefer stories that I can read in one sitting without waiting for the next chapter, but for you, I make an exception. This is really good. I mean it. I want to read more. ~ Joe

Sat, November 17th, 2018 8:58pm

Author
Reply

Awe, this comment really made me smile. I'm so fortunate to have you as a long time reader :). You've always made me feel so accomplished with my writing. As always, thank you so much for reading and leaving an amazing comment.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 3:09pm

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B Douglas Slack

As a brief bullying subject while in junior high, I knew exactly what's happening here. You've presented a classic case of bullying, and the results thereof. A couple of holes in the plot don't detract from the overall story and can be filled easily. For a first chapter, I think you've got a winner here. I expect dark retribution from your MC. The character of Blue will fugure into the plot, no doubt. In my case, having the base boxing instructor train me for three months, I beat the bully to a mere shadow of himself and he didn't bother me any more.

Bill

Sat, November 17th, 2018 9:42pm

Author
Reply

Wow, so sorry that happened to you, but I'm so happy you gave him what he deserved! Thank you for taking the time to read and leave this very helpful comment.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 5:27pm

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Mingo1206

Very enjoyable read! I felt as though, you could maybe take a little less away from the beating and still communicate the severity of it. Blue is a very interesting character. I am interested in seeing how Blue and the Protagonist grow. Great job and keep writing!

Sat, November 17th, 2018 9:48pm

Author
Reply

I've never been good at writing out fighting scenes and any type of violence, so I understand how I could have overdone it. Thank you for the suggestion and for taking time to read this chapter.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 3:12pm

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Bubble115

Great, keep up the good work!

Sun, November 18th, 2018 12:32am

Author
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Thank you.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 5:27pm

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ShadaStorm120

I know what you mean about the formatting. I've given up changing the font type and sometimes size. I just focus on colour now, but even then it cuts out words, which is a real pain if you want to do something quick. I absolutely love this beginning though. I feel so bad for the main, constantly being picked on by this dude. What is wrong with him. He's older and bigger than her, just bullying her relentlessly. I admit he does seem a little cliche though. Big, not overly smart guy who's a football player, but other than that, the main is pretty strong for being able to put up with him for so long. It must be incredibly tough, but she pushes through it anyway. I like the mystery with Blue, too, and I definitely wanna know more. Fantastic job so far :D I'm excited for more :)

Sun, November 18th, 2018 5:52am

Author
Reply

Yes the formatting is sooooo annoying! I wanted to keep him cliche because from my experience its always people like him that are the assholes. They use their size to push people around and the school hardly does anything because for some reason where I live sports is more valued by schools than education. Thank you sooo much for reading and leaving this amazing comment.

Sat, November 17th, 2018 11:16pm

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David Cameron

You left a 'quickie' on my profile requesting I read this and that you'd return the favour if I did. You don't have to read my Halo adaptation. It's not for everyone, but I thought I'd still drop by and have a look at your story.

I admire how you jumped right into the action. I was immediately pulled into the story. Fortunately, the violent bullying isn't exactly a situation I can personally relate with, but thanks to your writing, I was still very easily able to empathise with the character. The dialogue was believable and the writing in between felt quite natural. It was an easy read, and that's certainly a good thing. I'm intrigued by the character of Blue. Overall, well done. :)

Sun, November 18th, 2018 8:57am

Author
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Thank you so much for reading.

Sun, November 18th, 2018 1:37pm

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Hasch

What can I say that will do justice? Lol
I'm a fan of tense or jump-right-into-action starts, so this got my attention. Especially the "Blue" Enigma.
I like your writing style. It's simple and cohesive. I wish I had that. Lol

Sun, November 18th, 2018 3:48pm

Author
Reply

Awe, this is a really sweet comment. Yeah I like to keep things simple...that's why I'll never be a fantasy writer lol. Thanks for reading!

Sun, November 18th, 2018 11:55pm

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AmethystShiro

Thank you for sending me a read request for this book.

I found it an enjoyable read; it is a shame that it is so early on in the writing as I could have easily read a few chapters with how you write and tell your story.

I look forward to finding out where your is heading.

Mon, November 19th, 2018 8:21am

Author
Reply

Awwwe, thank you so much. Your comment really made my night. I'm so happy you enjoyed it, and thanks for reading. I will be sure to keep you updated.

Mon, November 19th, 2018 12:26am

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Ellen p

Good piece of work, but disturbing.

Tue, November 20th, 2018 9:06pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for reading.

Tue, November 20th, 2018 8:03pm

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Josephic

Nice start! I like the pace at which this is going. Blue huh? Seems like she is going to be one fascinating character. Great work as always Poetic, thanks.

Sun, November 25th, 2018 12:55pm

Author
Reply

Thank you.

Mon, November 26th, 2018 9:47pm

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Skinny Coutreux

Icomments are something I don’t use frequently, so I’m trying them out on your project in terms of actual critiques, and leaving the comment section for overall thoughts. The story seems interesting - apparently I missed a prologue. I have added your story to my reading list. Puck a project on my page and knock yourself out :)

Mon, November 26th, 2018 5:51pm

Author
Reply

thank you so much for reading.

Mon, November 26th, 2018 9:47pm

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Ashley I Read

I really enjoyed this chapter. I’ll be reading on when I’ve got time :)

Sat, December 1st, 2018 2:03pm

Author
Reply

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Sat, December 1st, 2018 11:28pm

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TheSinningCrow

The formatting on Booksie is so bad, so don't judge yourself or think that you made some errors. You're the writer, not the formatting lol. I am sorry for taking forever to read this; truth is I've been staying away from Booksie, and not really reading anything. I'm thinking about leaving. This is familiar in tone to Monochrome, in the dark themes and how they are real life, and not just a piece of fiction written on page. Bullying is a topic that will live on forever unfortunately, and it is so hard to write as fiction, because the topic itself is real life. Jaden is that typical bully who thinks he is God because he is popular and plays for the football team. They fail at homework, and getting those grades is the main reason they do it. They think they have power, and that is what Jaden is believing. I'm actually not going to mention the main character yet, because I want to get an understanding of the other characters first. Controversial:) I have a theory about Blue, but will not mention it. The letters are a touching moment, because the words mean that victims of bullying are a person, not a statistic, and someone out there cares for them. You needed a long break from writing, because this story seems the one that you want to complete. I love that this story is fiction, but the story is also real life because of the topic. I think this is caring and quite great. It has the tender moments with the letters, and that is vital because it is hope. Excellent start.

Mon, December 3rd, 2018 9:05pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much for the sweet comment. There's so much more I want to say so I'll continue this in private.

Sat, December 8th, 2018 5:17pm

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Aparna Gopan

Heyya! This is really good! Can't wait to read the rest. You've got some talent in you hon ??

Sun, December 16th, 2018 9:32am

Author
Reply

Thank you !

Sun, December 16th, 2018 10:58am

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BriannasBooks

I was bullied when I was 12 and 13, and even though it wasn't physical, I remember my parents saying they'd go to the school all the time to report it. One day, they actually did, and even though the bullying kinda stopped, the guy would say mean things to me and then say, "Oh wait, you'll tell the principal," all snarky. The starting of this novel is painfully realistic, because bullying is still such a problem. I really liked the mystery of Blue - I love the idea that a stranger leaves sticky notes to lift the main character up after a bad day. Even though this was a short chapter, this kept me interested all the way through. I think I'm definitely gonna keep reading this one. Awesome job! :)

Tue, December 18th, 2018 6:13pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much for the thoughtful and kind review. Thank you for taking the time to even read this. Sorry about what happened to you, people are assholes. Even though I've never really been bullied my little brother was. Bulling really isn't the main purpose of this story but I'm happy you're willing to stick around.

Thu, December 20th, 2018 3:49pm

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Amy R. Beckett

Oooh I'm intrigued - good start, only a few minor grammar/phrasing things, most of which I think have been picked up on already. Personally I think I would have liked the first chapter to be a little bit longer, just to really get us even more immersed in the story, but that's just my opinion :-)

Thu, December 20th, 2018 5:41pm

Author
Reply

Well I kind of base my chapter lengths on what I prefer (digitally that is). I personally tend to get bored if chapters are too long (even if it's a good story...weird ik) so I always try to make mine short but interesting, especially the first chapter. Thanks for taking time to read this and leave a helpful comment.

Thu, December 20th, 2018 4:00pm

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Silgorious

Great start. Felt the bullying part rather scary and I feel this is an awesome book.
Thanks for the invite. Enjoyed reading this.

Wed, January 2nd, 2019 4:39pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for reading.

Wed, January 2nd, 2019 5:51pm

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