She Made Her Home

Reads: 291  | Likes: 7  | Shelves: 1  | Comments: 9

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic


She Made Her Home

 

She made her home amongst the thorny stems,

sharp protrusions barely scratching

as she wove her way

between the stalks

of those blood red flowers.

Petals smelling so sublime

but they are her hiding place.

Flickering tongue and venomous bite,

a serpent waiting for the exact rose-tinted time

to strike.


Submitted: November 30, 2018

© Copyright 2021 hullabaloo22. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

jmm424

Just like sone people. I couldn't look at the snake. Lol. Great job, Hull

Fri, November 30th, 2018 6:50pm

Author
Reply

Exactly! Thanks, jmm.

Fri, November 30th, 2018 11:47am

Mike S.

Excellent take on the pic, Hull!

Fri, November 30th, 2018 7:21pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, Mike. Always pays to be careful of what might be hiding in those roses.

Fri, November 30th, 2018 11:54am

Sue Harris

Love this, Hully, such evil hidden behind that beautiful emblem of love. Great write!

Fri, November 30th, 2018 7:26pm

Author
Reply

Just what I wanted to say! Thanks, Sue.

Fri, November 30th, 2018 11:56am

Jeff Bezaire

A lethal beauty. Well written, Hully. Great pic too.

Fri, November 30th, 2018 10:07pm

ratwood2

The last two lines

Hi Hully,
OK, I like the poem although I have never found a snake in my rose bushes.

For me, poetry is as much visual as it is auditory and the placement of words on a line become important to conveying the image. I lose the image at the end. Either the last line needs to be only the word "strike" or the last two lines need to be written differently.
If the next to the last line end with a comma and then the last line could be simply the work "strike". This is one idea of what I would do with the last two lines:

a serpent waiting, time for
ad rose-tinted strike

Sat, December 1st, 2018 1:11am

Author
Reply

Well, thanks so much for that comment, ratwood2. I'm honored that you spent so much thought on it.

Sat, December 1st, 2018 5:15am

Tom Allen714

Well said Hull, beware of beauty...Tom...

Sat, December 1st, 2018 4:37am

Author
Reply

This is something I seem to have a habit of doing, mixing snakes in with roses. I guess the symbolism of romance and the danger of the snake seem to go together in my head. Thanks for giving this a read, Tom.

Sat, December 1st, 2018 5:17am

unmasked delusions

Creepy... I like what you did with this one. It was surreal at first, not realizing it was a snake, I thought it was some kind of jungle girl or someone wandering from home

Mon, December 3rd, 2018 5:29am

Author
Reply

I do have a habit of associating snakes with roses, unmasked. Thanks so much for giving this a read.

Mon, December 3rd, 2018 5:51am

Sharief Hendricks

Now if ever a rose had a more dangerous thorn...

very clever Hulls

its a pleasure reading your work !

Mon, June 22nd, 2020 9:09am

Author
Reply

Thanks, Sharief. If you haven't guessed, I'm not a fan of roses.

Tue, June 23rd, 2020 11:20am

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