Two Figures Entirely Human

Reads: 450  | Likes: 5  | Shelves: 2  | Comments: 6

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Contently Deranged Travelers


1/2/19

 

Written after watching a couple ice skate….

 

Tall young man

Strong yet gentle

Gliding,

Moving gracefully.

It’s almost supernatural;

The rise and fall,

The push and pull.

He throws his partner

And brings her back in.

He twists her above his head

And supports her throughout the dance.

How beautiful it is …

How whimsical,

Magical

Mesmerising,

And tranquil.

How soft and delicate.

How radiant and grand-

The talent of the two,

The commitment and dedication,

The emotions

Entirely human,

The expression, the moves

Familiar like a feeling;

A vague childhood memory

Or dream.

Sad and happy,

Giddy yet elegant,

Timeless,

Intrancing.

I understand this,

I think,

Somehow, in

Some way I do

And you relating too

Or understanding all in our own way this story unfolding.

This passionate tale without description,

Without words

Only surreal  majestic movements.

The story is vague yet profound,

Ever changing and everlasting.

My heart is jumping for joy.

I feel it’s …

A metaphor of all the love stories that ever were,

The love of our ancestors

It's striving to express the purity, the indescribable

All of us one in the same in this one thing;

Love-

True love that never fades.

I feel this dance is

Expressing the peculiarities of love.

Both are afraid to be the first to say

I’m sorry.

Alas,

He’s pulling her in,

But she’s pushing away.

He’s growing weary.

She’s afraid,

But she makes the decision-

She comes running back to him.

They fight,

But it’s not violent.

They fight out of love,

They’re fighting to hold on.

Finally a sigh of relief-

Everything’s okay,

Because now they embrace-

They spin in a circle without letting go.

Time doesn’t matter here-

No, nothing matters in this moment

Except the love

That feels too real to be real,

But it is.

Right now

It’s more real than anything they’ve ever known.




 


Submitted: April 06, 2019

© Copyright 2021 unmasked delusions. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

hullabaloo22

Dancing through emotions on ice. Beautifully described, unmasked.

Sat, April 6th, 2019 7:33pm

Author
Reply

Hey Hully, good to hear from you. Thank you :)

Sat, April 6th, 2019 1:31pm

Bert Broomberg

Really good poem. There is one thing I'd do differently, I'd forget about the last line. I find that without it, the poem visually tapers down to those words "Right now." The last line is there as some sort of afterthought, and I think it is superfluous. The dramatic impact of the poem will be bigger without the last line. Just think about my suggestion. Dont'get me wrong, I think the poem is really enjoyable.

Sat, April 6th, 2019 8:10pm

Author
Reply

Oh not at all, that's a good suggestion actually. Thank you. I feel like it sounds odd just ending with "right now" though, but I might rearrange it by taking the "in this moment " from the line "no, nothing matters in this moment" and placing it at the end of right now, so instead it would read:
Time doesn't matter here,
No, nothing matters except the love
That feels too real to be real,
But it is
Right now,
in this moment

Does that work better or does it still sound weird?

Sat, April 6th, 2019 1:27pm

DLCannon

My God, this is sow sweet! I wish I coulda' been there.....

Sun, June 16th, 2019 3:34pm

Author
Reply

Sadly I wasn't even there in person, I just saw it in a video but I could really feel it and was trying to accurately get across what I was feeling or what I thought was what they were trying to express in their dance.
Again, thanks for reading : -)

Sun, June 16th, 2019 8:34pm

DLCannon

This is very cute! I love the wind too.....invisible, yet SO powerful! I wonder of it's gonna be a windy fathers' day.....

Sun, June 16th, 2019 3:39pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for reading, but I think you might have accidentally commented on the wrong poem. I don't remember this one being about the wind.
It actually was a little windy today haha even though it's hot aready for summer

Sun, June 16th, 2019 8:30pm

Forrest Obzerveer

Wonderful. It is poem with a beautiful description of two people living a moment where words aren’t needed. What better way to illustrate love?

Thu, July 11th, 2019 11:02am

Author
Reply

Thanks for taking a look at this and the nice comment.

Thu, July 11th, 2019 7:15am

Ezra Enzo

Incredible combination of mystery and love. It is an interesting POV of the narrator that isn't "him" or "her", which is new but very interesting for me. Great job. - E.E

Sun, March 7th, 2021 3:52am

Author
Reply

I haven't heard from anyone in awhile so this was a nice surprise :) I forgot that I had written this one from that point of view. I think I chose to write it that way because it was easier to get everything across instead of switching back and forth between the girl and boy or only telling one side. Thanks for the nice comment

Sat, March 6th, 2021 9:21pm

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