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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
In her most revealing interview since her divorce from husband, Jayson, Louys Red-Ball tells you the real reason she had to walk away from her marriage.

Photographs: Scott Scotford Fashion Director: Salmon Ella

V2: 11.05.19

Submitted: May 03, 2019

A A A | A A A

Submitted: May 03, 2019




In her most revealing interview since her divorce from husband, Jayson, Louys Red-Ball tells you the real reason she had to walk away from her marriage.

Photographs: Scott ScotfordFashion Director:Salmon Ella

Louys is barely wearing a shiny black leather jacket halfway down her back, so as to reveal an alluring, if tasteful, glimpse of her breasts. She is standing in front of an off-white background, in perfect contrast to her buoyant mood, a mood that tells you she’s free, thank heavens, free to love again.

You stand well out of camera-shot and start the interview with an easy question.  

‘How are your lovely children, Louys?’

‘I wasn’t intending to discuss my beautiful children, you. Our split was painful, heart-rending, enough, all those screams in the shower, the blood-tipped knife, plates smashing on the kitchen wall. But Jayson and I remain good friends.’

‘Do you, really, Louys? It is alright if I call you Louys, isn’t it?’

‘Don’t suck up to me!’

‘I wasn’t sucking up to you, Louys, I was asking you a question. Do you remain on good terms with Jayson?’

‘Officially, for the children’s sake.’

‘And what’s that supposed to mean?’

Louys Red-Ball lets her shiny, black leather jacket slip a little more down her shoulders and raises her chin, lifting her head to show you her bare, drainpipe neck. Her magnificent neck: complete with three tiny love moles, holds straight, holds firm, in the face of your interrogation.

If Louys Red-Ball doesn’t want to answer you, then she won’t. She’ll just raise her head and stare at the ceiling. Let’s take a closer look at the real reason why she had to walk away from her marriage:

Louys, 45, has a divine chin, pink pouting lips, snub nose, false eyelashes, two tell-tale studs in her left earlobe and a shock of voluminous curled caramel gold hair that falls down her back. She is content, she is free, she wants you.

‘Listen, I’m excited again. I’d forgotten what that feels like.’

‘What kind of answer is that?’

‘The right answer.’

‘Can I ask you something personal?’

‘Go on, everyone else does.’

‘Do you love your children, Louys?’

‘How dare you ask me that! Of course, I love them! Dieter rang me only the other day from boarding school and asked me how the new video was going.’

‘And what video was that, may I ask?’

‘The video for my new single, ‘Crotch’. It’s out now.’

‘Thank you for that, carry on.’

‘Where was I?’

‘You were telling me about Dieter? The video?’

‘Oh, yes! I said, Dieter, I uh, um, am currently wearing a leotard.’

‘And what did he reply?

‘He said, I’m just not going to look at it, Lou.’

‘He calls you Lou, your son calls you Lou?’

 ‘Mm, as in Louys?

 ‘What did you say?’

‘I said, Diet, you’re just going to have to understand, this is a crap world for attracting men unless you wander around in a leotard?’

‘It is quite sexy’, she says sheepishly. ‘Not, you know, boobs out, but real, empowering for women of my age. People have probably been expecting me to sing the heartbroken song. I didn’t want to be that predictable? So, I’ve gone sexy and funky for the first man I find. I want him to say, Oh, you’re not what I expected.’

‘Thank you, Louys. We’ll take a break now for the advertorial, give you a chance to change into your next outfit.’

‘You’re welcome! Tasty shirt!’ She rubs her hand up and down your hairy arm in a tactile way, slipping her fingers underneath your turned-up cuff. ‘What is it, M&S?’

They break for the Advertorial.


In her most revealing outfit since her divorce from husband, Jayson, Louys Red-Ball tells you the real reason she had to walk away from her marriage.

Photographs: Scott ScotfordFashion Director:Salmon Ella

Louys is wearing a black trench coat undone at the front to reveal a lacy black bra, and sheer black fishnet tights. Sadly, the outfit makes her look old, tired, jaded. Louys puts on a weary smile. Her lips are cracked and chewed. Her snub nose is running. She wipes her nostrils dry with the back of her crinkled hand. Her skin is pale and flaky. Her hair has split ends.

There are tears in her eyes. She opens her coat and bares her breasts at you which makes you feel queasy and embarrassed. A fading star about to be extinguished. Her big, round, green eyes, welling up with tears. She rubs your hairy arm in a tactile way, making you flinch. Then she bares her soul about her marriage split.

‘I don’t blame Jayson. It was down to me to say, Something’s not right.’

‘How so?’

‘Well, I did go out more than I’d ever gone out.’

‘What about the kids?’

‘They board?’

‘Sorry, carry on.’

‘I’d found a bit of a spark. I was enjoying myself. I guess I’d always been such a perfectly-behaved pop star. Then I got married, had children. It kept me away from playing the game.’

‘You played the game, you were a?’

‘Mm, are you saying I was wrong to play the game?’

You shake your head and nod wildly, ‘No, just intrigued.’

‘Why, intrigued, are you saying what I did was wrong?’

‘No, I just didn’t take you to be that kind of a person, is all.’

‘Are you saying that I acted indecently, is that what you’re saying?’

‘You swallow your chin and check your interview sheets. It’s just that I remember the headlines?’

‘What headlines?’

‘Um, uh, like ‘Louys is out on the town, drunk again?’

‘That’s f**king crap! I was always home by 1130, sitting with my husband having a bowl of Frosties.’

‘Shall we move on?’

‘I think we ought to, don’t you?’

‘I understand that you’ve been seeing a therapist.’



‘Once! I saw a therapist once. When I said I wouldn’t be back, my therapists bullying tone was hard to believe.' Louys bursts into tears.’

‘Like a Kleenex?’

‘Mm, thanks.’

She wipes her eyes but the tears keep on rolling down her cheeks. You feel for her: over 45, wealthy, fading star, money can’t buy her love, husband dating a 21-year old model, kids at boarding school.

You feel really sorry for her. You want to button up her black trench coat, take her in your arms and give her a big hug, but you can’t. Hugging celebrities isn’t allowed. She might sue you. Instead you wind up the interview and pass her the box of tissues.

‘Louys,’ you say, ‘after all that you’ve been through, the divorce, the battle to retain your children, your nervous breakdown, the sexy video, the new single, this fashion shoot, how would you describe your emotions at this time?’

Louys Red-Ball, 45, fading popstar, divorcee, former whore and drug addict, chokes back her tears, looks you straight in the eye and says:

‘I’m happy. I’m scared. I’m stronger than I thought’.

‘How about you?



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