Trapped In My Own Filth

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic

taken from my book, "Blown Out Of Proportion"

Trapped In My Own Filth

-

Loving just nobody

Help me harm myself, and no one else

I'll be putting myself thru Hell

Because I love nobody

It's too hard to be somebody

In anybody's life

There' a crack in my heart

By some woman

There's a wear in my tear

Never go back

To normal again

Slimiest of control

What the fuck does my mind know?

I'm not about to love any one

I'm just sick of being pissed off

Why is there no one to love?

At a time like this

It would help to be with somebody

Yet, I know I never again will

Why I've been on so many pills

Yet, my one thrill, is the one that kills

"Love"

Pure and true

I've met no one new

How could have I?

Can't go outside in this new norm'

Where the whole world is at a standstill

And pain doesn't help me know the truth

Like the laughter

And whatever helps

To pass the time while the world's locked down

Outer space sounds like a better place, right now

But we won't get there anyhow

All thee important members of society

__get to go outside

While the rest of us have to stay inside

This would have been easier

Had I found some one I can really love

Instead of memories of women

__I can never have

I'm bustin' my ass, line after line

Still nobody is going to be mine

I can tell myself it'll get better

But it's not even getting easier

Let alone "better"

Nobody knows what is wrong with

__my sorry ass

I think that's better off

__left for the professionals

____to figure out

There's thee only ones that can now

Any ol' woman just won't do

Out in the world, lines are long

Lost on my own, I have to live here

All alone

This wretched Hell won't go away

And my mess doesn't clean itself up

And I don't give a fuck

__to clean it, myself

What a disaster

Table thrashed

Desk thrashed

Floor dirty

Dust ev'rywhere

And the world wants us to be tidy

Well, we can kiss that idea goodbye

'Cause I ain't a maid

All this filth around me

Is overwhelming, and exhausting

__to even look at

Yeah, I'm pretty sure

__it's me being dirty

That's causing my singlehood

But what can I do?

I hate cleaning up

It's so tedious

I'd rather be alone

Than be a neat freak

I've been commonly swept away

With ideas of how I can change a thing

But I don't need to know what's wrong with me

-

04-15-'20 #7

D. L. Cannon


Submitted: April 21, 2020

© Copyright 2021 DLCannon. All rights reserved.

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