One Huge Roach And A Kiss

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic

When Covid-19 hits the world, the lockdown is effected which leaves Natalia alone at home as her parents are stuck at their country home. Mike(Michael) despite having clashed with local defense unit soldiers previously for violation of the curfew, uses this opportunity to visit Natalia who he has crushed on for months. The moment is sweet before curfew time gets him on the way and struggles to get home.

One Huge Roach And A Kiss

It had been, or felt like, if you like, seventy two hours of sleeping in the couch head down, head to the right, head to the left plus numerous other self-invented couch-sleeping styles. I had quaffed uncountable glasses of whatever drinkable liquid I had laid my hands on and checked my social media groups and news feeds. I had changed TV channels countless times before switching it off. The music on my phone had long become monotonous for it had played daily on repeat for the past month. That hadn't impeded me from playing it that day too. All the movies on my discs had been long watched repeatedly with LA Casa De Papel as the worst hit by this re-watch syndrome. I had played every game on my phone and emerged winner - perhaps due to the great experience I had amassed in the past couple of weeks- in most of the competitive trivia games. And it was still 5. 23pm!

Just when I thought I had exhausted all that there was to do, I remembered that there was one more thing; While all of us had been quarantined at our homes, there sure was one exception. One whose daily routine hadn't been tampered with by the lockdown. This wasn't about your essential workers, for their schedules, too, had been affected. This was about the one who was left to roam around as usual. For he bares no hands and spreads no 'rona. For he needs no sanitizer and uses no public transport. 

He does neither the sneezingyi nor the okwetsyamura. For he had no car and drove no trucks. His temperatures were overly high yet no one suspected that he could carry the 'rona. He set out daily from the east and headed to the west and none of us knew what the devil he'd be going for. So it was time for me to watch him retreat to his blanket, how beautiful! Whether it was boredom or unconsciousness I got myself looking through the window, hoping there there would be something for me to do; sunset to watch, at five!

My assurance of the presence of the sunset or lack there of was terminated by the conspicuously red paint on the house across and further by the enchanting face that protruded from the house's window. My eyes had deliberately overlooked the picturesque green view of the football pitch that intersected Natalia's house from my rented single room. That damn pitch had almost sent me to the cells the previous evening.


Being overly bored and tired of home on the 38th day of lockdown, I had decided to walk down the road to the community football pitch. Getting to the pitch, I had caught up with a few other people; brothers in the tired-of-staying-home spirit. They had suggested we play some soccer and that surely did no harm. My sweat pants came in handy for a perfect attire so it was a yes for me. I agree I'm not one of the best footballers but I have also never perceived football as a game of talent. Running around trying to get a spherical container of air and kicking it away in a certain direction once you get it means no talent for me! Everyone can do that! 

So we played till about a quarter to seven. Fifteen minutes were surely more than enough for me to get home had it not been Gregory. Gregory is a dark-skinned slender guy I worked with at the sand mines on Lake Victoria two years ago. He has a huge sense of humor and I surely missed him so when I ran into him in our neighborhood as I was coming from the pitch, I couldn't resist the urge to have a chit-chat with him before proceeding home. What was supposed to be a chit-chat became an hour's talk and we mutually forgot about the curfew time and soon it was 7.55pm.We were too excited to mind the curfew but that wasn't the case with the security operatives, LDU(Local Defense Unit) to be exact. 

“Bring those two," roared, in an ugly voice, a man that seemed to emanate from behind in a path along which Gregory and I stood. The ugly voice sounded so close and the it was evidently from a group of LDU soldiers but surrendering has never been an option. I took to my heels and so did Gregory in a different direction. Just as I thought I was good at running, Some seemingly booted feet clomped faster and heavier in my direction but I was determined to emerge the Bolt of the day. This soon failed as the guy soon grabbed me by my shirt. My next attempt was unbuttoning and leaving the shirt in his hands - like I've always watched in movies. This, too, was futile as the guy grabbed me by both hands effortless. The chase was finally over and I was looking helpless like Christmas chicken. He started dragging me back to the rest of the officers and I knew I was headed for the worst. “Can we talk, sir, " I, while panting, suggested the Ugandan way. He suddenly flung his hard palm with a force of a missile and it landed on my cheek. “I'm sorry,sir," I said in grief as the pain from the slap took a stroll from one cheek to another. My tormentor, suddenly stopped, peeped at where we were going and pushed me down. I hit my butt down and it sounded like a ripe jackfruit. 

“How much do you have?" he roared. 

“Five thousand, sir," I replied frightened of what would befall me if I didn't sound polite enough. 


I hurriedly pulled out the five thousand note from my pocket and handed it to my tormentor who immediately vanished to my relief. I got up and ran, as fast as I could, to my room. I hope Gregory, if his legs betrayed him like mine did to me, thought of the Ugandan way. If he didn't, I hope he enjoys his time in the cells. 


I peeked from the comfort of my room, at Natalia who seemed to steal a glance at the howling of the wind that swept through the neighborhood and nearly flung away weak guys like me, thank heavens I was indoors.

Natalia's father was terrible at one thing; choosing colours. As much as I love ketchup and melons, I strongly think it's a weird idea to paint one's residential house red! Can't think of a more terrible thing to do. However, Natalia's father was amazing at one other thing, giving birth to beautiful children. As far as I knew, Natalia was by far the most beautiful girl in the neighborhood. She had coral black hair that flowed on her shoulders. She had nectar-sweet lips that looked blossom soft. She had a sculpted figure which was twine-thin. She was wasp-waisted and had a burnished complexion. A pair of arched eyebrows looked down on sweeping eyelashes. A set of dazzling, angel-white teeth lay on the upper side of a shapely chin. She had a bouncy personality and a sugary voice, which I adored. Her sense of style was the last nail in the coffin.

 Her beautiful eyes quickly met mine and her lips opened to give a breathtaking smile. She waved at me and I was in seventh heaven as I returned the favour. Wind suddenly blew towards her side sending a chunk of dust straight to her eyes. Her lips opened once more, this time not in a pleasant way, and she placed her long fingered palms on her face. It was quite unclear whether she was hurt or expressing something. She suddenly retreated to the house and that ended our nonverbal communication.

I had first met Natalia at the mall. She, alongside her brother, Thomas, were headed to the cinema just like myself. While her brother checked out the posters, I quickly initiated a chitchat with her and asked if I could have her contact. She responded in the affirmative and the mission was accomplished. We soon parted ways as we sat in different parts of the cinema. I don't remember any scene in that movie, for I didn't concentrate, I was thinking about Natalia all the time.

I've always known that I'm a lucky man and this was cemented by the discovery I made in my subsequent conversations with Natalia on WhatsApp. She lived in the same neighborhood as I. I had just moved to this neighborhood about three months ago but she had lived here for a year and a half.

Despite the proximity between our residences, I had never been to their house and neither had Natalia been to mine. The smile with which she had waved to me didn't, as they say, leave me the same. I had learnt, through, our WhatsApp conversations, that Natalia's parents had travelled upcountry when the lockdown and the ban on public transport were declared. They had therefore got stuck at their country home, in Mitooma, leaving Natalia and Thomas, his brother as the only people at home. Thomas was a news reporter with a local television station. That meant he was one of the essential workers who were allowed to continue working. This further meant that Natalia was, without a doubt, at home alone at this moment! There was no better time to visit Natalia!

I visualized Natalia and I hugging as the cold drops of water made their way to my head. Down they trod to my feet and they seemed to irrigate more fantasies of Natalia and I. The softness of the soap as I dragged it on my body could only be compared to Natalia's tender skin.

The sweet scent of my Christian Dior Sauvage cologne as I sprayed it on my body further triggered my memory of how nice Natalia had smelt at the movies.

Tick tack went the clock above me as I grabbed the keys to my car. KIDDING! I don't have a car, the keys were for my single room. The clock seemed to suggest that I was getting late so I hastened up. Hope bloomed inside me as I trod the path leading to Natalia's place. I could hardly contain my excitement and I felt like my feet could no longer touch the ground for the last few tens of minutes before arriving at their oddly painted house.

“Quit hammering on the damn door, I can hear you already. Who's there?"

“Quit complaining already, it's Michael."

“Oooh! Mike, I'll open now." the melodies of her sweet voice echoed in my heart and my heart beat was quadruplicated.

The aura of her beauty swept across my face as the door swung open.

She caught up to me, and she threw her arms around me. And … hugged me.

It was what I would have expected a hug from Natalia to feel like, if I’d ever thought such a thing were possible. First of all, I almost fell over from the impact. Also, my arms were pinned tightly to my sides and I felt like my ribs were about to snap. I was so surprised that all I could say was, “”

Happiness streaked through me like a comet, a quiet contentment spread through me as she led me to a huge soft black leather couch in their vast living room.

Natalia looked a thousand times more beautiful than how she had looked minutes ago when I saw her through the window. Her cat face looked cuter than anything else I could have imagined. Even the slightly fresh bruise on her left cheek seemed like an ornament that adorned her already beautiful face. This scar-like bruise however made me want to put an end to the pleasantries and find out from her what could have happened to her.

“So what's this that bruised you here?" I said shyly as I touched her soft cheek.

Her attempts to respond were marred by a sudden cracking sound of a huge insect that flew from between the sideboard that stood opposite us and the huge plasma TV screen that was mounted on the white-painted wall. It landed on the floor a few feet away from her. I reached for the doormat and hit the roach hard in total disgust - for I hate cockroaches with a passion--killing it instantly. She swept it out of the house and we resumed our conversation.

“I took a nap yesterday and woke up like this, don't know what happened," she said with a light smile.

“Seems that roach tried to kiss your nice lips while you were asleep and it failed," I said jokingly to which she laughed unearthing a white set of beautiful teeth.

“And now he's dead, poor Roach!"

“I, too, would die trying to kiss your lips," I threw another joke.

“You wouldn't die, of course, unlike the unfortunate Roach."

I cast a look at her lips surreptitiously and she caught me. We both burst into a laughter.

I'm no expert at reading feelings from faces but she probably liked me too or rather I was just excitedly overrating my relevance to her.

A joke led to a smile and a laughter and to another joke till late.

I looked at the Casio wall clock that hung up on a wall and it was a half past nine!

Time, indeed, flies! Especially when you are with someone you are with someone you love!

“I need to go, dear," I said as I got up from the comfort of the couch.

“Thank you for coming, Mike," she got up and opened the door without a hesitation like I had expected.

“Thank you for hosting me, Natalia, the 

 pleasure is absolutely mine," I said as I stretched my arms out to suggest a hug.

She stepped closer and wrapped her arms around me and that must have been the best moment of the day. Both of us went mute for about 30 seconds. I remained tight-lipped as my index finger and thumb made successive caresses at the bruise on her cheek. My other hand let go of her and started caressing her hair. My confidence quickly shoot up and I grabbed her head and twisted it to an angle of forty five degrees. Things got steamy as heat rose from Natalia's stomach to her head through her chest. 

Her whole body tingled, the feel of my frame leaning on hers as my arms wrapped around her felt nearly forbidden. I pulled her in, claiming her mouth.

As if time had sopped right there, as we stood propped against concrete pillars on the porch, glued to one another. As if no one else existed and there was no risk of Thomas watching us in case he pulled up right then. And for me, as if I’d never been shy to begin with.

Thanks to the threatening rain that was announced by the drizzles, I finally let go of Natalia at exactly three minutes past ten!

I regained my senses as I ambled, in darkness, towards my house. It is at that moment that fervent rays hit straight into my face nearly blinding my eyes. The light, seemingly from a rechargeable handheld torch, emanated from the road from the football pitch heading to the neighbouring town. I knew I had fallen straight in the hands of the ferocious LDU. I nearly shitted my pants in fear as I stopped to put up my hands as an attestation of surrender. As I waited for the “LDU" to unleash their brutality, bafflement befell me as the light quickly went out and a pair of people or so burst into a loud laughter and entered into the house, at whose verandah they were standing. I briskly embarked on my walk towards home at a horribly fast pace. In a few moments, I was at the gate of our rented units to my relief. I sighed at the sight of the gate and dipped my hand in my right pocket to get my keys.

Further despondency hit me up in the face as I tried to put my hand through the hole on the gate, in an attempt to unlock the padlock on the inside and realised the hole had been blocked from the inside by putting the second padlock which barred anyone from opening from the outside. This, the newest occupant in our hood, who occupies the room directly opposite the gate, had done a couple of days ago, perhaps mistakenly and thank heavens she had been quick to open when I knocked from outside. This time, however, was a different story as I got no response for the first about five minutes despite the numerous knocks on the gate. I went on rampage after about seven minutes of no response and upgraded my knocking skills, applying mild violence. This yielded results as I heard rattling sound of the opening door of the house directly opposite the gate. Soon, voices from different neighbours of mine would join as they converged inside near the gate. One voice seemed to suggest to the rest to be farther from the gate just in case the person(or thing) they were about to open for was a dangerous one.

Another voice insisted that whoever was seeking to be opened for speaks so that they could ascertain whether it was a voice of a person they were familiar with. 

This was funny because we literally never talk to each other since we're always either indoors or at work. However, if that would save me, I had no objection. 

“Hello, it's me," I shouted. I passed this test as I heard my immediate neighbour assure the rest that it was “the guy in the last house up". 

 Another voice suggested to the person who had approached the gate to open to only open the padlock on the small hall on the gate since “all of us have keys to the other padlock." I passed this test too as I inserted my hand inside and opened the gate with ease. I walked in with great relief and was shocked at how they had converged in straight files as though they were waiting for the guest of honour.

“I'm sorry guys, I'm late but this is a terrible way of locking the gate," I said as I walked through them like the commander in chief inspecting the army parade.


“You need to be back early young man, these are unusual times," said my immediate neighbour. “I'm sorry, man," I stopped to acknowledge that I was in wrong even when I was a hundred percent sure I wasn't. 

“That kind of locking is weird though," I politely insisted.

“Its better you get people's contacts in here otherwise you'll sleep outside the gate one day," said Anita my beautiful young neighbour that I had met only once. 

“You're right," I said politely, “actually let me have the number."

She read me her number as I happily entered it in my phone, I knew my next target was confirmed. Anita would be the next available option just in case Natalia ruined the mission I had launched that day. I retired to my single room and slept on an empty stomach, as on most of the days, with my hopes high that government posho would reach our neighborhood soon.


The End.

Submitted: May 01, 2020

© Copyright 2021 Mr. Muhwezi. All rights reserved.

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