My journey of life

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic

A heartbreak is never a reason to stop living your life the way you want it.

My journey of life 

 

Just 4 months back I broke up with the girl I thought was going to be with me my whole life. But apparently she wasn’t THE ONE. I have the belief that there is a special someone for everyone but for me that person surely wasn’t this. I believe that feelings  you had for someone never fades away if its true. Because true feelings never change its goes on, even after 40 years together it wouldn’t change. Some people might think at first they have feelings for someone and some might pretend to be nice and when they know the real person behind the façade  they leave  blaming all on the feelings. When actually  you had feelings but not for the person but for the way they behaved  feelings didn’t change the person did. Anyways leave that apart  let me tell you my story. 

I was lying on my bed. Redness and swollen eyes. Sleepy yet unable to sleep as if something was stopping me from leaving to my imaginary dream world. As if the reality I thought is better than dreams are now turning difficult. I was on the bed stuck in the movement, wondering how my life turned out to be? What was happening to me? I got the best thing I wished for(or at-least I thought so then) and now why does life feel so difficult when I think it through? do I take step by step? I had no answer for the questions.  started over thinking every possible  negative result that could happen.

 

Exactly 1 year 10 months back I came back from abroad after finishing off my studies.i was a workaholic type of person. Business and to have a beautiful small family of my own was my dream since childhood and that's what I came to do. To make my dream a reality. I joined a firm. After a year and 6 months, something i never imagined would stand in the way of my dreams  stood up against me. As a kid  i was thought life would be easier as an adult but now when i am an adult it's so frustrating. I was working as a sales boy  at a shop.it was all so easy at first. I was really happy. I had a lot of great people in my life whom i could call family. Friends so close to me. And  one day on  social media i met a girl whom i thought was “The one”  the way she talked was sweet and she had the qualities i wanted. After few months of talking i fell in love with these qualities she had  so without further due i had asked her out on a date. We went for a coffee  near the beach. To make a good impression i went to pick her up with some sunflowers as it was her favourite. After first date i liked her more and more felt as if i had feelings for her while really  i had feelings for the qualities she was showing me. I asked  her to be with me  for the first few months it was all happy and lovely and after that. I gradually started to feel as if she wasn’t the person i had feelings for  because she was really changed.i had lost all my friends  because she didn’t like them. She started to take the driver seat of my life. Arguments and fights had started yet i tried my best to be with her. I felt as my feelings was changed. Yet i was so determined to work it out with her i never realised that it wasn’t me in front seat of my life anymore i was more like a puppet. Who would do anything to make  the relationship last.It took me  a while, 6 months, to realise that my feelings were still same but the person had changed. But still i didn’t want to give up i tried. And then i had no choice but to leave. My life had stopped  at that moment. I felt as time was still.(but little did i know god had better plans for me.) 

 

My dreams slowly started to shatter into small pieces little by little,lost the friends, i was all alone. Unable to concentrate on anything.  Being careless, becoming lazy day by day. I felt  like everything was over for me. Until i realised  that life  doesn’t  start or end  when someone walks into it. It stops only when i quit it. I realised that i had to live my life for myself, live for the friends and family  who are there for me. 

Suddenly one day in front of the place i work  i saw a beautiful girl standing  near the shop. Her smile had captured me. Her dark brown eyes had me drowning in them. The time stopped ticking i felt all kinds of zoos in my stomach, i wanted to know about her but i was too shy to face her. I asked my colleagues to get information about that girl,pointing at her.After somedays i got enough information. I started stalking her on social media. Whenever she came to our shop my colleagues keeps looking at me. Telling me to confront and talk but i couldn’t and after days i sent her a friend request on social media and told my friend to tell her that i said hi and i didn’t think my friends had the guts to do it. But that day when they told her i saw the smile on her face. I could keep looking at the way that smile forms forever.It was magical i was already falling for her and i didn’t even know her personality. The next day she had accepted my friend request and  we started texting each other. From one text”why were you so shy?”  The conversation started. From texting for few hours it turned into continuously talking day and night. She was always laughing  and she was so caring. She gradually robbed my heart. After sometime I knew from the way she behaves around me  that she kinda likes me. So I asked her on a date.i took her to a resort on a photo shoot of a friend as she really wanted to see that resort. I was planing to ask her out while we were there  but  when we reached  the resort,while we were on the pier she held my hand  firmly and asked me  to not leave her alone there even for a second. I said to her in a funny tone that our hands are tied with steel and locked and if possible i would hold her in my arms forever.i kissed her on her forehead. And somehow i felt as she have feelings for me so i stopped myself from asking her  about it. After a fun trip  we were about to go back and at the ticket station she asked if i had anything on my mind that i want to tell her and i said no. And i saw her happy face slowly turn into a sad  face. I waited and waited for her to tell me or give me  one more clue. While on the launch our ride back home  she whispered to my ears if i would be with her. And i said forever instantly.

Since that moment life has been better. Since i met her  everything feels right.And most importantly, as she says,correction she said  “be with me .(full-stop)”  and later i had to put the question mark there, i was back to being my happy self  when i met her. As i told feelings they don’t change it was the same but before it was the person who changed  and it felt as everything was over. If someone truly loves another they wouldn’t ever change their behaviour knowing that they might lose  the other. Life is full of surprises this is my journey. Its ok to have a lot of heartbreak before you meet “The One”  what do you do if  you go to shop for a couch. Don’t you try them and if you don't like the first you  go for others until you find a perfect couch. heartbreaks are ok because in the end it will all be worth it.

Life can be a lot of things  but when you finally meet the right person it would be so beautiful as a dream come true. This is my journey of life.


Submitted: May 09, 2020

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