Haunted by my thoughts Part 1

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic


I've been taking sleeping pills at night to help me try to get some sleep
Maybe these pain killers will also mend this pain that cuts me deep

Each pill that is flushed down my throat fails to get rid of the lump that keeps me up at night
Fighting an endless battle that makes me toss and turn at night
Maybe these pills bare the strength to carry this heavy pain inside my heart

I think I'm afraid
I'm afraid of going to bed every night only to find those thoughts that hide under my bedroom pillow.
Waiting...
And anxiously waiting to attack my anxious mind and it has come to my conscious that I'm afraid of the thoughts that hide under my bedroom pillow.

They creep in my head like a thief in the night.
Silent.
Patient but potent.
Taking each step like it's walking on thin ice.
Very gentle and steady but it takes so much when it leaves if it does.
Leaving a big hole in the depth of my heart with open doors leaving me vulnerable to sadness to walk in that door
For tears to walk in the other door.

Sometimes I need company.
People around me that can comfort me
Sometimes I just wanna be alone in my room
Watch sad movies and cry myself to sleep

Sometimes I feel like having a drink or smoking some weed
Even though these things are a need
But they all bring temporary happiness
 


Submitted: May 25, 2020

© Copyright 2021 Siya Luwaca. All rights reserved.

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