Chapter 12: Sneaking around

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic

Reads: 95


‘’He’s still in love with you, it’s fucking obvious, he stares at you all throughout lunch,’’ Blair was making her case, hard. The tweezer in her hand diligently plucking at her eyebrows. She just focussed on the pain. ‘’Rian stares at me too,’’ she argued.

Again, she didn’t want to think about Joel as an option, at all. He wasn’t, at least for another 4 months, and even after that it would never work. Too much had happened between them. If only she could tell Blair that, any of it.

‘’Well, yeah, Rian is in love with you too, clearly,’’ Blair sighed out, chuckling as she leaned back to take in her work. ‘’I’m so proud! You have two gorgeous guys into you, you have a boyfriend! Three months ago you wouldn’t even consider going on a date,’’ she excitedly went on.

‘’Did you have sex yet?’’ She waggled her eyebrows, suggestively, followed only by a long expectant stare.

‘’Nn-no,’’ she hesitantly mumbled out.

‘’Ah, so you did other stuff, right?’’ She grinned, widely, picking up on her hesitation right away.

Other stuff.. She’d felt Rian’s fingers, his lips, his tongue, his every part down on her.. parts.. She never asked for any of it. Despite that, he did make her come, every time again. He made her feel good, and dirty, at the same time. That and about a thousand other feelings she didn’t even dare get into.

Blair jumped, excitedly, squealing out in joy over her long silence that she probably took as an admission of guilt. Silent agreement. ‘’How far did you go? Did you like it,’’ she squealed again, leaning in up close. ‘’Is he big?’’ She gasped out.

‘’I don’t know! I haven’t seen, it,’’ she fiercely objected. She’d felt it about a couple dozen times. He was always hard. Every single time she got close, he would be. It amazed her, how easily that seemed to happen.

‘’Why not!’’ Blair disappointedly sighed out, sitting herself back down. ‘’Don’t you want to.. I mean, he’s your boyfriend right? You love him, right?’’

Nope. No, and again, no. And, maybe, a little bit of.. well..


Curiosity was a bitch.

Blair grinned, proudly, waggling her eyebrows once again. ‘’Are you worried about something? Like, you know, maybe is not a yes and not a no. Is there something holding you back?’’

She was sweet sometimes and understanding, beneath all the roughness and school girl excitement. Blair was a girl with many faces, none of them fake. She could be anything and everything and then nothing at the same time. A true chameleon, she adapted to the person she spoke to, fitting their needs. It was what she liked most about her.

Sadly, she couldn’t even begin to explain to Blair just what was holding her back.

‘’I just don’t know, I’m not in a rush,’’ she shrugged it off. ‘’I’m kind of mad at him, actually, he doesn’t want me to hang out with Joel alone. He’s usually here all weekend but I just didn’t want to see him,’’ she added. Much to her surprise, he actually agreed to leave her alone for two days.

‘’Well,’’ Blair sighed out, after a long silence. ‘’He is your ex-boyfriend, and he clearly still has feelings for you,’’ she shrugged. ‘’I wouldn’t like it,’’ she argued.

One reaction that just dropped her jaw. ‘’I can’t believe you’re agreeing with him! It’s controlling!’’

‘’It’s just jealousy, he just likes you a lot, he’s scared of losing you. You haven’t been dating that long and then some old flame comes along professing how he misses you and stuff! And he’s good looking, you have a history together, that’s intimidating for any guy,’’ she pouted, pulling her chin in to continue on her untweezed left eyebrow.

‘’He’s just insecure about it.. But you’re right, he should trust you. You’ve done nothing to make him doubt that, and his jealousy shouldn’t drive a wedge between you two,’’ Blair recovered herself when she took in the glare on her face.

‘’It’s just-‘’ FUCK. They both jumped upon the screeching noise of her doorbell ringing. Surprise, surprise, as if he knew she was alone, she opened the door for the last guy she expected but the one she needed to see. ‘’Joel.’’

‘’Hi,’’ he smiled at her, sweetly, familiar. ‘’Can I come in?’’


Nerves pulsed throughout her body. After 10 years of building an intense bond, she could tell when something was wrong, in his eyes, in his demeanour. The awkwardness he radiated upon discovering Blair on her couch, who immediately pulled him into small talk.

It was, awkward. Nearly three weeks had passed since he moved to town and she’d barely talked to him outside of lunch hour at school. Even then, Blair would do most of the talking and she had to be careful not to piss off her captor sitting beside her. Or, her master.

‘’So, Joel, what do you think of Rian?’’ Blair started her inquisition, while she hid in the kitchen, pouring the three of them a much needed glass of wine.

‘’He’s eh, quiet, don’t know him too well,’’ Joel casually brushed her off. ‘’He seems nice.’’

‘’Doesn’t it bother you that he’s dating Lane?’’ She brazenly continued. ‘’I mean, you came all the way here,’’ she suggestively added.

Joel chuckled, taking a sharp breath. ‘’Well, if he makes her happy it doesn’t.’’

‘’Oh, come on, that is so cliché, just be honest with us,’’ she fiercely objected.

‘’What do you want me to say?’’ Joel chuckled out, relaxing his arm on the backrest of the couch as he leaned back. Comfortable. She needed more of that. ‘’Thank you,’’ he happily took the glass she handed him. Blair denied, getting herself up off the couch. ‘’Nah, I should head out,’’ she smiled at her.

‘’Bye bye, have fun you two.’’ – With just that and no objections she left them alone, in quite the rush, against Rian’s wishes and against her better judgement. She needed to talk to him…

Joel silently smiled at her as she sat down, sipping her glass as she awkwardly smiled back at him. Thinking of some way to start the conversation. ‘’Are you mad at me? I’m sorry, I just forced myself back into your life.’’ He took it upon himself. ‘’I haven’t seen you at all, I know you’re dating him and stuff but I really hoped we could talk, or spend time together, I just don’t know what you want,’’ he added. His voice hoarse and tone broken off and on. Her heart broke as well.

‘’He’s jealous,’’ she whispered, nodding slowly at the guy as she scooted a little closer toward him, crossing her legs on the couch as she shifted to face him. ‘’I do want to spend time with you, I’m glad you’re here, really,’’ she assured him. ‘’I’ve always wanted to find you one day, and then you found me,’’ she added, chuckling softly. He did too, leaning in to take one of her hands.

‘’I’m sorry, Joel, it’s just complicated,’’ she whispered, squinting her eyes down at her lap as she thought, hard, of any reason to give him for not being able to see him. It was excruciating, keeping up with so many lies.

‘’Does he treat you right?’’ – Not really, but yes. Maybe, better than she expected? Still. She shouldn’t have to lie to Joel, hide from him. It wasn’t right. The timing. None of it was right.

Rian - She felt like a docile little kitten entertaining his every wish hoping for a little affection. Affection she found herself starving for from time to time. Whenever he wasn’t around, she couldn’t help finding herself wishing he was, wishing he’d hold her. Wishing for his approval? But then when he was around, she hated him, part of him. Most of him. All she wanted was for him to get out of her life. For four months to pass quickly.

‘’Lane?’’ He drug her attention, eyes widened with the realization she’d completely forgotten what seemed like an important question. He sighed, scooting in a little closer to take both her hands. ‘’Lane if there’s something wrong, you can tell me,’’ he pressed her, in a soothing voice. His bright blue eyes stuck on hers like sparkly glue.

‘’It’s just,’’ she whispered. No longer did she have the strength to raise her voice up to an audibly pleasant level. Tears prickled at her eyes and her hands started to get clammy inside his firm, warm ones.

‘’Nothing. - Nothing’s wrong..’’

‘’Good.’’ She jerked, up and away from Joel’s grip, that voice, his tone it tore right into her very soul. A shot of adrenaline pumped through her and on impulse she reached for her nose which magically seemed to stay dry.

Rian sat there, in the windowsill under the open window. In plain sight. Joel didn’t flinch, didn’t gasp. – He fucking saw the guy come in, he didn’t say anything. - He didn’t even react to a guy breaking in to her house though the window. Rian looked angry. His deep brown eyes set to absolute thunder as she looked her up and down, before they strayed over at Joel with a deep sharp breath.

‘’I think you should go,’’ he ordered, ominously.

Joel didn’t move. He didn’t flinch, he didn’t realize the danger he was in but her heart seemed to be pounding right out of her chest. She stepped toward Rian who just squinted at her, raising one warning eyebrow.

‘’Are you going to hurt her if I leave?’’ Joel challenged him.

Rian scoffed, leaning up to his feet to step forward, about a foot away from that couch. ‘’No, but I will hurt you if you don’t,’’ he growled.

‘’Rian.. Calm down,’’ she whispered, taking his right hand in both of hers. He didn’t respond, he didn’t jerk it away, he just stood there, glaring.

‘’And then what?’’ Joel asked, calmly, the guy had nerve. Or he just didn’t pick up on the thick vale of tension in her tiny little living room. ‘’What are you gonna do?’’

‘’Joel, just go, please,’’ she whispered, carefully.


Joel scoffed, calmly getting himself up from that couch, they stared – glared – at each other. Passionately. He warned the guy to stay away from her, he warned Lane to stay away from him and she defied him.

‘’You know, you have changed, I take it back,’’ Joel stated, without breaking his glare. He was addressing Lane though, who pinched down on his hand, tightly. ‘’The girl I knew wouldn’t let anyone tell her what to do, even if it cost her, well, her life. – Or, others.’’

Silence. He could hear Lane’s breathing stammering beside him, she took a deep raspy breath, her hand clasped onto his as if she’d fall of the face of the earth if she’d let go. He couldn’t be sure, but it sounded like she was crying..

‘’A lot of others.’’

She snickered, softly, clearly.


Not only did he go against his wishes, touch her, cosy up with her on the couch. He had the fucking nerve to break her down into tears, his girl, and he would pay. Hard. He lunged forward, breaking her grasp to firmly and appeasingly plant his fist in the guy’s face.

His stomach.

His ribs.

‘’Rian!’’ She cried.

There was barely any response, Joel didn’t fight back he just took the punches, rolling himself up in a ball to protect vital organs. Grunting loudly with every single one. Every single soothing fucking punch he threw, until his blood started shedding like water on the floor.


He warned the guy. He’d warned both of them of what would happen if they went behind his back. He could kill him right in that moment. Fuck. He should kill him right in that moment.

‘’Rian!’’ She cried out, again, hard. Her arms wrapping around his waist as she pressed her body against his back. ‘’Stop, please, stop,’’ she whispered, a plead of pure anguish and desperation. One that disgusted him. For that guy? He was a pig. He was nothing. ‘’Please, please,’’ she kept chanting. ‘’Please.’’

He didn’t have much of a choice, she was practically begging. Or, maybe he didn’t want to kill him. He didn’t want her to hate him.. Not again. Her warmth on his back, her arms around his waist, her breath against his neck. That was everything.

‘’Do you want to kill him for touching me in the past? Because, I would never forgive you for that.’’

‘’Promise me you won’t hurt him.’’ – ‘’I promise.’’

‘’Get out,’’ he growled at the blood covered lump at his feet. ‘’Before I change my mind.’’

Joel coughed up some blood, charmingly so, as he rolled over to his side to scramble himself up from the floor. ‘’Joel,’’ she let go of him, reaching for the guy.

‘’No,’’ he growled, pulling her back down into his grip, his arms, tightly. ‘’Get. Out.’’ He warned.

Joel let out a scrambled, raspy sigh. ‘’Call me,’’ he taunted, smiling at Lane through the swelling in his eye, before he stumbled his way into the hallway and out of sight.

Lane burst out in tears. Sobbing loudly, harder than he’d ever heard her do before.

He held her for a while. Stroking her, shushing her, comforting her. She just cried in his arms, face buried in his shirt, unresponsive to anything he said or did.

Until, after a good 15 minutes she finally broke the silence. ‘’You said you wouldn’t hurt him,’’ she sobbed out. Distraught. Her voice sounded nothing like it usually did. It was high pitched, shaky, scared. He did that. Joel.

‘’You said you wouldn’t hang out with him alone,’’ he growled.

She pushed him, or herself out of his arms, scooting back against the nearest wall where she huddled herself, knees tight to her chest, face buried. ‘’Go away,’’ she sobbed.

‘’Lane, i-‘’

‘’I hate you! I hate you! You’re terrible! How can you do this to me?! How can you do this! I hate you! Go away!!’’ She was hysterical, and she just kept yelling. Repeating the same phrases over and over again.

‘’Lane, calm down,’’ he moved toward her, only to jerk her up out of her protective stance, blood running down her face, and tears, she didn’t seem to care.

And then, before locking herself into the bathroom, she broke his heart.

‘’How could I ever love someone like you?!’’

Submitted: May 31, 2020

© Copyright 2021 Seikopsychochan. All rights reserved.


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