Fly With a Storm

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Action and Adventure  |  House: Booksie Classic

I am learning to polish up my poetry. This is a rewrite,with different title, correct my typos and cut down all the unnecessary words.
A sweet memory of mine. Feel free to give me suggestions.

Fly With a Storm 

Darkness cracks through the sky 
holds the earth tight with tension 
electrons rumble fast within clouds 
pressurized, ready, steady and go

Lightning strikes
it is hot and bright
lightning strikes 
down to my spine
lightning strikes 
I sense it bites 
right into my bones

The roar of the thunder
beat of the drums
they close around my skull
echo aloud deep in myself 

I am rolling and rolling in my bed
electronically excited 
believing I am the cloud 

Tonight is the night 
of a summer stormy night
I don't wanna lie flat and hide
I get up and put on my raincoat
walk against the winds to coast

Waves surge to the tallest sky
winds blow like a war-cry
standing on top of a rock
I spread my arms wide
try to fly as a kite

Oh! I do can fly! 

Raincoat's flapping its flying wings
catching the up splattered rain
my legs are taking off the ground
I am pushed aloft with the winds

The roar of the thunder
beat of the drums
they close around my skull
echo aloud deep in myself 

I am flying and flying towards the sky
electronically excited 
believing I am the cloud

All I am thinking is 
let's 
fly
higher
and 
higher 

Then, I hear my name is called
the rope tied to my waist is pulled

My dad shouts, from down under 
a scared, tired, cracking voice,
'You have flew high enough 
can we please go home and 
have a good night sleep now?'

 

 

 

 

 

 


Submitted: June 16, 2020

© Copyright 2021 Derina Peng. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

Mike S.

There's something about a storm huh? Excellent, Derina!

Tue, June 16th, 2020 5:37pm

Author
Reply

Yeah. I like it for some reason, lots of fun memories.

Tue, June 16th, 2020 4:14pm

Jobe Rubens

A kind of unconscious longing to be indivisible with the elements. The lockdown had created a lot of stale air - and flies. I thought at one point you were going to hold mjolnir aloft. Tightening - editing's good. But the way you phrase certain things really makes your work unique. Brilliant piece!!!

Tue, June 16th, 2020 6:33pm

Author
Reply

Thank you! Jobe. Can you please tell me which phrases? I try not to be too "strange", really. A bit going off the rails, sound like.

Tue, June 16th, 2020 1:50pm

hullabaloo22

I've got to say your poetry has come on in leaps and bounds, Derina. This is excellent!

Tue, June 16th, 2020 7:13pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, Hulls. it is nice to hear this. There is a lot for me to learn still. I wish to get better and it is fun to reedit the past works. The mistakes are galore. Especially the typos.

Tue, June 16th, 2020 3:15pm

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