A Tale of Two Pussies

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

The title says it all.

A Tale of Two Pussies

Hatred is preferable to love -

It never ends.

My landlord found an abandoned cat that he couldn’t look after and wondered whether I would look after her; after all, I already have an abandoned cat. How hard can it be looking after another? Very hard! She just trod on my keyboard and added a lot of unnecessary semi-colons I had to delete.

Tom Tom is being very ill-mannered and will have to stay outside until he develops some compassion and kindness, so it’s going to be a very cold winter for him, but he has a fur coat. I’ve set up a spare room for him to sleep in, but it has a glass divide, so he sits behind it and glares at us. He is a very disgruntled cat at the moment. Too bad. At least I’ve got something to write about. I can write a book called Feminism for Castrated Cats. It’s bound to sell.  I thought of the title last year when I drunkenly asked Emma, the Sooky Girl, to move in with me after she threatened to move out of Hopelesstown last year.

She has two girl cats, Tiger Lily and Minnie, as well as her daughter’s dog, Chloe, who she is ‘looking after’. She also has a wether named Captain, but there are two hectares of scrub and paddock here. There is plenty of room here and they could all have been accommodated, but she chose to stay with Scoop, as he can provide her with illicit substances. She claimed it was out of ‘loyalty’. Funny word, loyalty.

Scoop get’s all the girls, despite being confined to a mobility scooter, and suffering from cancer and emphysema. There was Bev, the Harradine, who died of a drug overdose last year. I first met Emma at her funeral last year; then there was Delphine, who is currently in long-term rehab; and now Emma, the Sooky Girl. I wonder what it is that he has that I don’t? Is it his prosecution for possessing five ounces of Cannabis Sativa and unlicensed firearms? Or his chronic alcoholism? Or the fact that he pays no rent and contributes nothing to their relationship? So many rhetorical question and so little time.

I recall drinking with Scoop many moons ago, up at the Top Pub, when he and Emma were estranged and she was with Monty, the married farmer. She’d messaged Scoop to tell him she no longer required his illicit product as she was now scoring from Monty. I don’t think Scoop was terribly happy to receive the news. Funny word, loyalty. I didn’t know it was synonymous with adding insult to injury, but what would I know? I’m just an imbittered old man who deserves to live and die alone, or so I’ve been told. I cannot deny being cruel and petulant but there are worse things to be. Faithless and hypocritical for starters.

At least the music is glorious today – Saint Saën’s Samson and Delilah and a Bach piece played on the organ at Notre Dame cathedral, which miraculously survived the conflagration. Why did Bach have so many children? Because he didn’t have an organ stop. I heard that riddle on ABC Classic FM of all places.

I’ll have to develop a strategy regarding my two cats I suppose. I will be the United Nations and they are the two Koreas. At least it’ll give me something to do during my isolation and take my mind of my eternal loveless loneliness. My new cat is a tiny little tabby kitten I have named Persephone. She is gorgeous and good natured, unlike Tom Tom, who is cruel and petulant (I wonder where he got that from?)

Oh well, I’ve procrastinated for too long. I should have something to eat – whisky for brunch isn’t really very nutritious - get dressed and deal with this cat emergency. The landlord is bringing his gorgeous sister Laura over tomorrow, so I’d better tidy up the shack a bit I suppose. I should write another letter to Delphine and ask how she is going in rehab. I’ll ask my landlord if I can move her in here after she gets out. That’ll really piss off the Sooky Girl. She once told me that I was alone because of my petulance and cruelty, so I’ll prove her wrong, again. Mind you, it’s hard work putting up with Delphine, but not much harder than dealing with two warring cats. The complete Four Seasons by Vivaldi is playing now, so the cats will have to wait.

Submitted: June 19, 2020

© Copyright 2021 Craig Davison. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:


Sharief Hendricks

Excellent insight into you interesting world Craig...

The cats will eventually figure it out , just like dogs do after the initial marking of their territory...

Hopefully Delphine is doing well enough to be discharged soon..

As for Scoop , I'm not sure what he has that you don't, besides maybe the wheels...chicks dig that , I suppose, as long as it comes with a steady supply...hahahaha

I must admit I had a feeling Sooky girl would come up in this one...

Entertaining and insightful as always Craig !!!

Thu, September 17th, 2020 9:58am


Thanks Sharief. I avoid most people in this town nowadays. As long as I outlive Scoop and Wiz, I'll be happy.

Mon, September 21st, 2020 5:36pm

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