Want a free house? Sue Elton John!

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

A satire article about sueing Elton John for a new house.

The following is satire and not to be taken seriously:)

If your reading this then I know what you're thinking. I must be crazy! There is no way a man as powerful and important as Sir Elton John would ever give out a free home! Perhaps for some charity case but that is a stretch. If you were to sue him, it would be a joke right! Wrong! The truth is he owes several million people a free home and there is legal documented proof that this is the case.

In his 1970 hit "Your Song", a line clearly states; "I dont have much money...but if I did...I'd buy a big house where...we both could live.."

Notice he makes a solomon verbal contract that agrees to buy a big house in the event that he becomes wealthy or as he puts it, "...If I did (have money)...I'd buy a big house...

Today in 2020, Elton John is worth an estimated 500 million dollars making him one of the wealthiest entertainers in the world.

As of 2020, the average price of a median house is $280,000, well within Elton John's price range.

Now I know how silly this all sounds and your thinking that I am reading far too much into this.

For one, surely this song doesn't apply to me, the author specifically. After all, "Your song" was released in 1970 while I was born in 1982. Surely "Your song" was dedicated to some love interest of John's and that is who the verbal contract was made to.

Let me then submit this piece of iron clad evidance...the song states as follows..."You can tell everybody...that THIS IS YOUR SONG... "

And consider the following that states.."But the sun's been quite kind while I WROTE THIS SONG It's FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT KEEP IT TURNED ON"

So there you have! Since I the listener as well as many others, have kept the song on, then the song is dedicated to us. And to us Elton gives his verbal contract to buy us a house where we both (the listener and the writer) could live. Notice it says COULD LIVE. Doesnt mean the writer MUST live there.

In short it is undeniably clear that Elton John or at least his lyric writer, Bernie Taupin, who is currently worth 150 million, should honor the verbal and written (yes the lyrics were written as well) contract that was made to the listeners of "Your Song" and buy us a big house today!!!

Submitted: November 26, 2020

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Add Your Comments:


Serge Wlodarski

This is funny. Maybe I'll sue Bare Naked Ladies for If I Had A Million Dollars.

Thu, November 26th, 2020 11:28am


Haha true

Thu, November 26th, 2020 3:55am

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