Valley of Clouds

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

I entered this under humor, but I'm really not sure.

It just so happens that there is a valley covered in clouds, and this valley is sheltered from the world because there is no internet satellite service. Why? Because it is covered in clouds and all transmission towers are on the other side of the mountains that surrounded the valley.

I know it is a strange situation, in this day and age, but the fact is that the Valley of Clouds is living in the past.

In this valley, there are houses and apartments where people live, and all of those are below the clouds.

And then there are the towers that were built to rise above the clouds. You see, only the Tower owners are allowed to climb the stairs and to view the sky above; after all, they built the towers, so they had exclusive rights to seeing the sky; as well as other satellite connect-ability benefits; but that is a story for another time.

 

Well, with no way for the ordinary valley dwellers to order online, and with no Wal*Mart available, most commerce came by way of wagons. You see, the road through the mountains is not paved and is not suitable for car or truck traffic; wagons and carts are the only way to transport goods into the valley.

So our story begins. In the midst of the Spring a Seller-Man came selling.

When he slowly rolled his humongous wagon into town, it carried Liniments, Oils, Lotions, and Potions. It carried Hydrates, Serums, Creams, and Solutions.

And all around the back was a line of Bric-a-brac, with oriental dishes, painted gold and black.

There were quilting fabrics and all sorts of Notions. And lets not forget the Concoctions and Potions.

 

Yes, the Seller-Man carried all sorts of cures for all sorts of real and imagined ailments that plagued residents in the Valley of Clouds.

 

It just so happened that the Seller-Man had a cousin that lived in the valley, so the cousin said to the Seller-Man, Tyler, "Come, stay with me and my family while you are here in the valley. We have plenty of room, so there is no sense sleeping in that drafty old wagon. And I'll bet you'd like to sit in a hot tub of bubbly-water for a cleansing.

So what about it?"

Tyler, the Seller-Man, replied, "Your valley is always cool during the day, and very cold at night, so I would be more than happy to have a warm place to sleep for a change.

As for a cleansing, a bubbly-bath would do me nicely.

I accept your kind offer!

 

One day lead to the next, and it was not long before the Seller-Man had sold all his Liniments and Oils.

The residents of the Valley were so in need of cures for almost everything, they were willing to pay through the nose for whatever the Seller-Man had to offer; even his supposed cures for all sorts of real and imagined ailments sold out quickly. So it wasn't long before Tyler got rich.

Tyler told his cousin, "Never before have I sold a wagon full of goods, all at once and so quickly. And never have I been able to charge such high cost amounts. I wonder what I should do with all this wealth?"

Then after a moments thought, his cousin, Ramble, replied, "Buy another wagon and buy even more Liniments and Oils, and all sorts of cures for all sorts of real and imagined ailments. Then hire someone to drive the second wagon for you."

"Hmm," The Seller-Man said as he thought.

"Hmm," he said again as he shifted himself in the seat he was saddled in.

Then he said, "Hmm," for a third time, and that is when he stated, "I am weary of traveling and the mountain's road is torturous; I'm afraid I am not willing to guide that wagon through the passes again. No, this was a one time venture and it has paid me well.

Besides, sleeping in that drafty old wagon makes my bones creek.

I need a steady source of income, I need to convert my riches into land. I should buy some land and become a Landlord. Yes, yes, that is what I should do! But what kind of property will render me a steady and profitable income?"

So his cousin, Ramble, replied, "Not farm property, that's for sure. With the clouds are always over the valley, so farmers don't turn much of a profit in this valley; there's hardly enough sunshine.

Besides, my dear cousin, all you know is selling and let's face it, you are a very good seller. But I'm afraid you wouldn't be good at much else."

Tyler shook his head in agreement, selling was his life.

 

One day, while out for a stroll, Tyler saw a sign on the door of a mansion-like house, and it said, "For Sale By Owner, inquire within."

"I wonder how much mansions cost," Tyler asked himself, "I guess asking couldn't hurt."

So Tyler knocked on the door with the aid of the iron doorknocker. "Clang, Clang, Clang!"

Then again, "Clang, Clang, Clang!"

Suddenly, a voice from within the house could be heard, saying, "All Right All Ready, keep your shirt on, I'm coming!"

Within a minute the front door swung open wide, and there stood the tallest, skinniest, wrinkled-est old woman anyone would ever want to see.

The old woman took one look at Tyler and said, "I Don't Want Any, no matter what your selling!"

Tyler chuckled and replied, "What makes you think I'm selling something?"

The woman shot back with, "You're a salesman, aren't you?"

Tyler quickly replied, "Well, Yes, but I. ..."

The woman cut him off by saying, "I didn't just fall outta the bassinet, Bub! I been around the barnyard several times and I know what I see when I see it! And soon as I set eyes on you I said to myself, Agnes, he's a salesman, and you don't need anything that he's trying to get rid of!"

"But I'm not trying to sell you anything," Tyler stated.

Agnes laughed, then replied, "Oh sure, that's what they all say. They get their foot in your door, and they notice a spot on the rug, then they say, "I have something that will take that stain out, just let me open my demonstration bag and I'll show you how it works," they say, but by the time they leave your house they have taken every coin that you had in your purse!"

Tyler butted in and said, "I'm here about the "For Sale" sign that you have hanging on your door. How much do you want for the house?"

"More than a salesman can afford," Agnes replied rather snidely.

Tyler was annoyed, and when he's annoyed he gets rattled, and when he gets rattled he yells a lot. But this time he didn't, for some reason, he remained calm while asking, "What makes you think I can't afford this house?"

Agnes replied, "Cause salesmen never have a pot to pee in. They spend their money as fast as they get it, it is like they have holes in their pockets and the money just falls out as soon as it is put in.

Besides, it is not just the house that is for sale. The house is on the same property with the Sky-Tower, and they are a packaged deal."

As the old woman said that, she pointed, and when Tyler looked in the direction she was pointing, he saw the Tower rising out of the ground and shooting skyward. Tyler looked up, but could not see the top of the tower because the top was above the clouds.

After a moment of thought, Tyler asked, "Are you gonna give me a price, or not?"

"Three hundred Gibbets down, and thousand Gibbets at signing."

So Tyler asked, "Is there good stairs in the tower, usable stairs?"

"Good as that stone built tower is," Agnes replied.

"I want to see the house, and I want to have a look all the way to the top of the tower before I pony-up with the Three Hundred Gibbets."

"I want to see the color of your Gibbets before you set foot in either one," Agnes said laughingly. {She said that because Agnes still didn't think this salesman had that much Gibbets to spend.}

So Tyler opened his carry-bag and said, "I have more at my cousin's house, but this is what I have with me."

Agnes's eyes grew wide, then she escorted Tyler all around the house.

Tyler told the woman, it's a beautiful house, but don't you ever dust? The place is filthy."

To which the woman stated, "You know what the Good-Book says, "mankind comes from dust, and to dust mankind will return." So I'm not taking any chances, that dust might have been friends of mine, and far be it from me to disturb the dead."

And with that said, the old woman showed Tyler the gardens.

But when they got to the Tower, she just unlocked the gate, but would go no further.

"Is there something to be afraid of inside the tower, is that why you've stopped," Tyler asked.

"Oh, No!" Agnes replied as she laughed.

Then she stated, "I am an old woman and I have come to realize that my time in the sun is over. Those stairs to the top of the tower are more than I can handle, now days. And that is why I am selling this property; I don't want to own more than what I can use."

So Tyler went inside the tower alone, and step after step, up he went until he reached the top.

"Boy, what a climb," Tyler said after gaining his breath.

Then he went on to say, "I sure wouldn't want to climb up here every day. However, the view is spectacular, and the air smells clean and fresh. Nice and healthy, I would suspect. --- Hmm, nice and healthy, spectacular view, --- Hmm," Tyler was thinking.

***

A few months have gone by, and Tyler is now the proud owner of a mansion, which has been cleaned and converted to a bed and breakfast for travelers. And as for the Cloud Tower, it has changed too.

Every day, except for rainy days, you can find tickets being sold to the "Sky-Tower Extravaganza".

For just one-quarter Gibbet, you can climb the tower stairs to see the sky in all it's radiant-blue glory!

{"An invigorating climb, and time basking in unobstructed sunlight, what could be healthier?" asks the travel brochure.}

And after the basking in sunlight, ten minutes, tops, you will be strapped into the Dragon-Ride; which is a zip-line that carries you down and through the clouds at a brisk, but safe, speed.

Once on the ground, the attendants unstraps you and escorts you to concession stands where there are lots of things to buy, at very reasonable prices. {Reasonable prices because all the products were purchased online, via the satellite disk that is mounted on the top of the tower. And they are delivered by drone aircraft right to Tyler's helipad.}

Well, I guess it's true what they say about Tyler's new business, the Sky's the Limit.

 

 

D. Thurmond / JEF

12-08-2020


Submitted: December 09, 2020

© Copyright 2021 D. Thurmond aka JEF. All rights reserved.

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Comments

hullabaloo22

A very entertaining read, JE!

Thu, December 10th, 2020 6:06pm

Author
Reply

Thanks

Thu, December 10th, 2020 3:17pm

Ann Sepino

This is a fun read! I almost think it could be turned into a play, because even the dialogue has a whimsical touch to it. And Agnes is such a character, lol. There's something endearing about her almost grumpy, skeptical demeanor.

Sun, December 13th, 2020 7:39am

Author
Reply

Thanks Ann, I'm happy you liked it. --- And Yes, I think Agnes is a hoot.

Sun, December 13th, 2020 3:04pm

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