Somedays

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Song Lyrics  |  House: Booksie Classic

Somedays...

I look back on everything, like a distant
memory, a beautiful surface song.

I look back on everything, like a distant

memory, a beautiful surface song. That

when you get older you finally understand 

that it was a cry for help. That it was a

loud realization that we tried to learn, but

too lost in the moment to understand. Too

lost in the pictures, I was too lost in the 

the movies. I was too stuck on the

surface. It was the whispers in the back 

of my head that I finally understand, and 

when I look back. I was closer to leaving

than I realize.

 

I may be stronger than I was yesterday, but

if I’m being honest somedays I didn’t wanna

wake up. Somedays, I just wanted to walk 

away from me and find someone else. Just

walk away from my beautiful surface and see

if people can truly understand my song.

I may be stronger than I was yesterday, but 

right now if I’m being honest right now is

the moment when I’m getting more set in

to talk about it all. Finally able to say that

I was closer to the edgy than I realize.

 

I look back on everything, like a beautiful

picture. I used to pretend that it was always

here, used to pretend that it just came 

into existence. I now see that pain

and faith went into every stroke. Thoughts

of leaving it all behind is all behind on the 

otherside of the surface. I look at my life

now like that picture when I was young.

I used to think that all my blessings were 

just here, but now I see that all the faith

and pain that came into play. That behind the 

surface I was so damn close to the edge

and falling. 

 

I may be stronger than I was yesterday, but

if I’m being honest it was hard for me to 

get some good rest. Somedays, I just wanted

to ask myself to just walk away from me.

Just so that I wouldn’t get me, get me 

thinking about all the pain I wanted to just

sweep under the rug. All the light hugs

never meant a damn thing, but the harsh

brushes to my heart made me think about

the truth I didn’t think I could have. 

 

Would I go back? Hell no, because I’m 

starting to be grateful for all the beautiful 

surfaces. All the times I was on the edge,

and I had to pull myself back up. I’m now

starting to realize that I was a different person

than I was yesterday. I got past the surface 

and really knew what the hell I was and 

wanted to be. Somedays, like today I get

up and just think back to all the days I 

didn’t wanna get up and walk away. Today

I’m just glad I never did. 

 

The beautiful songs I wrote, the endless 

poetry that left my heart and poured from

my hands onto paper was just a cry for

help as I realize that I was on the edge. 

I’m just beginning to realize that I was close

to falling. The songs I used to sing, was 

just a hint of all the shortcomings I was 

dealing with. Somedays, if I’m being honest

I asked myself how I survived it all? How

did I not jump off the edge? What stopped

that one last bullet from piercing into me?

What stopped it from piercing and shattering

my whole existence?

 

Somedays...

 


Submitted: January 03, 2021

© Copyright 2021 Deon Durr. All rights reserved.

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