Unsocial Media (Let's Write A Country Song!)

Unsocial Media

Verse

Drinking beer after beer at my favorite bar

Watching everyone stare at their phones

 The only connections here are out in cyber space

We all might as well have stayed at home

CHORUS

 I’d like to connect, but not elec-tronica-lly

Got to be a better way to meet a lady

Seems like true love should come n-a-t-u-r-a-l-l-y

It’s enough to drive a redneck crazy

Can’t help but smile and think about bullfrogs

When I hear someone say the word Redditt

Rather sit on the porch with my old hound dogs

Millennial’s, ‘like you know’, will never get it

Verse 2

Shouldn’t have to scroll to the left or the right

For a woman to make this boy feel sappy

Meet her at a bar or at a church so - cial

The way my dear departed Ma met my Pappy

Think I found an app to take a crack at tonight

Hope it makes me finally feel happy

Here I go, I’m gonna swipe to the right

Give me a reason to shave and dress snappy

CHORUS

 I’d like to connect, but not elec-tronica-lly

Got to be a better way to meet a lady

Seems like true love should come n-a-t-u-r-a-l-l-y

It’s enough to drive a poor redneck crazy

Can’t help but smile and think about bullfrogs

When I hear someone say the word Redditt

Rather sit on the porch with my old hound dogs

Millennial’s, ‘like you know’, will never get it

Verse 3

Talked to a lady on my old PC

Then we met at a bar that weekend

Seems her profile was a bit untruthful

Turns out she was the missing LinkedIn

(Where’s Charles Darwin when you need him?)

Got a rotary phone hanging on my kitchen wall

Tired of searching on my old flip phone

Hoping and praying an old flame might call

Finally throw this lonely redneck a bone

Fade out with…

Can’t help but smile and think about bullfrogs

When I hear someone say the word Redditt

Rather just sit on the porch with my old hound dogs

Millennial’s, ‘like you know’, will never get it

Platforms?  My last girl friend wore platforms to work!

Does that count?!?

(Like a frog croaking) Redditt, Redditt…sounds like a frog…ha ha