Twin Flames, Spiritual Egotism, and Letting Go

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Religion and Spirituality  |  House: Booksie Classic

Twin flames have become so popular in our culture, we are beginning to miss out on the truth that all loving connections are equally valuable. That's why I'm writing this important post on the subject.

Recently, I had a conversation with a friend about twin flames, the spiritual egotism that surrounds them, and why the rules don't matter. We really agree on a lot of things! I think it's really important to write about this subject, because many people who have a twin soul experience get caught up in the rules and the "specialness" of it, and so I'd like to get some things clear for anyone who approaches these topics for the first time.

First of all, there's a lot of hype about twin flames, which I usually call twin souls, and I feel that this hype is overstated. It gives people an unrealistic view of what twin soul experiences are about. People often put twin souls on a pedestal, and feel that because they have a twin soul experience, they're somehow better than everyone else. In the same way, people who don't experience the twin soul experience may desperately chase after the search for their "twin flame" or "other half". These kinds of beliefs can actually take you farther away from yourself, your true spiritual path, and where you go in life.

The truth is that twin soul connections, while they are beautiful, divine, and truly loving, are not superior to other kinds of love that you experience in life. All spiritual connections of true love are equally valuable, whether they are friendship connections, family connections, or soulmate connections.

This is so important to know! People shouldn't feel they're missing out in life if they don't experience a twin soul connection, and they shouldn't feel that the connections they have with their soulmates are any less valuable. A twin soul connection is not the only way to experience true love, and anyone who puts twin souls on a pedestal may not fully understand that all spiritual connections are beautiful and meaningful in their own way.

Unfortunately, we now have an obsession with twin flames in our culture. It's interesting that just a few days ago, I read an excerpt that is archived of Cormael's website, where she used to share her experiences with her twin, Michael Hutchence. One of the most fascinating parts I saw were about how the new twin flame rules were beginning to infiltrate the internet; she was old enough to remember the time when they weren't there, and she warned people not to fall for misinformation about twin flame runners, signs and symptoms, the illusion of a perfect relationship, and so on.

The purpose for twin soul connections, in her view, was to help bring unconditional love to the earth and the hearts of other people, and raise the vibration of the planet. It looks beyond yourself to help benefit others in some way.

This is why it's so good to have a healthy skepticism of the mainstream info you see on twin flames or twin souls. A lot of the information out there is really misinformation, because it distracts you from your true path, and keeps you from connecting with your twin in an authentic way. It's important to question and only take what resonates for your situation and experience.

 

Spiritual Egotism - Soulmates Shouldn't Be Demoted

It's strange how things change. At one point in time, the soulmate was considered the pinnacle of love. Everyone was running and chasing for their soulmate, their perfect partner. Then twin flames came along, and suddenly soulmates got demoted. They were brushed off as "anybody can be a soulmate", and their status went down as twin flames went up.

When the big twin flame boom happened, I wasn't aware of it. I didn't know twin flames even existed until 2019, and didn't get reliable info until 2020, but the trend shows no signs of dying down. Unfortunately, we're seeing more and more people hop into the twin flame "industry" (it's hard to believe there's an industry at this point), selling stuff and making a business out of people's relationship troubles. Even if people sometimes have good intentions with these twin flame businesses, the fact is that you don't really need them on your spiritual journey. You can find your own way, read true spiritual experiences (and they don't just have to be about twin souls; near-death experiences are also fascinating), and most of all, appreciate any kind of love you experience in your life, whether it's a twin flame or a soulmate.

Soulmates have gradually disappeared from importance in a lot of spiritual communities, and to me this is very disappointing. Soulmate love and experiences are just as important as twin soul connections. In fact, you may experience a soulmate experience first before you connect with your twin soul. Even if you don't connect with your twin soul, you still can have beautiful love experiences with other souls, too.

Spiritual egotism is a tricky, tricky thing. I see a lot of twin flame communities that are all geared up about how "special" their experiences are. I agree that twin soul experiences can be among the most beautiful experiences you may ever have, but they aren't always easy, and they aren't superior to other love connections in your life.

Soulmates play an immensely important role in our spiritual growth. Many near-death experiences that I've read about show that we all connect with each other on a soulmate level, and certain souls may even become a part of our soul family. These souls have an important purpose; soulmates help us to learn, love, and grow, and they can be a calming and steadying influence in our lives. Soulmates are not inferior in any way, let's make that clear. A soulmate is a precious gift, a human being who loves you and cares for you. How can that be inferior?

Unfortunately, there is a harmful belief in many twin flame communities, at least in my opinion, that puts down soulmates and sets twin flames on a completely over the top pedestal. I guess everybody has those moments where they want to be on top, but to make it a habit means that you aren't growing in humility, or even basic empathy and understanding. Spiritual egotism - the idea that your spiritual experience or connection makes you more special and worthy than someone else - can be a toxic trap.

If people start putting themselves on a pedestal, make themselves feel more valuable, and tear others down just because they have a twin soul or twin flame, I would take that as a sign that they need to just take a step back and reflect a bit. It doesn't necessarily mean they're bad people; it just means that they may be falling into the trap of spiritual egotism. If you're on the spiritual path, you're bound to fall into a few traps along the way, but the important thing is to self-reflect, look into your heart, and see where you're coming from.

Spiritual egotism and "know-it-all" attitudes aren't really what twin soul connections are about. At least in my experience, I've found that sharing a twin soul connection with Jimi Hendrix is about much more than just us and the love we experience together. Even though that is a beautiful part of the experience, we've also grown a lot together, and there is a lot I've learned about my spiritual truth and about the afterlife. I've been able to share this with others and bring comfort to people who want to know what the afterlife is like, and that brings real joy to my heart.

If Jimi were a soulmate, I still would love him just as much. Do you think a label change would change how I feel? :) Of course not.

If I did find out Jimi was a soulmate rather than a twin soul, I wouldn't have a panic attack about it. I love him, and would continue to love him no matter what he is to me.

I feel we should love people for who they are, beyond the labels. Even though I believe the twin soul experience is a reality, and it is full of a very deep and beautiful love, it's not the "ultimate love" that no other love can ever measure up to. If I'd have to choose an ultimate love, it would be God's love, since there is nothing as powerful and deep as that.

 

Why the Rules Don't Matter

As I've written before, I don't believe that twin souls follow any particular sort of rule-book, because everyone's experience with the twin soul connection is unique. In my personal experience, trying to follow or fit into "the twin flame rules" only held me back from experiencing the connection I have with Jimi in a natural way.

In the years before I knew of twin souls, I simply saw our connection as a spiritual connection, and although the journey was kind of challenging because I didn't have a lot of knowledge, I also was able to experience the connection we share in a very natural way, which I feel was a true blessing in disguise. I've often seen people get too caught up in the "signs and symptoms" and the rules you're supposed to experience, which can be very draining and distracting.

It felt like a release when I finally let go of the twin soul rules, and realized that with spiritual connections, truly, anything is possible. There's a big difference between feeling the stress of fitting a certain rule-book, and simply flowing with the natural nature of whatever your spiritual experience is. And trust me, I know because I tried both ways!

I like to compare the natural way of experiencing the twin soul journey with the Tao in Taoism. People often give themselves so much unhappiness because they try to force their twin soul experience to fit certain rules, signs, and so on. This is similar to fighting the natural flow of your life experience. But when you let a twin soul journey unfold in the way it's meant to be, without you trying to force or control it, it's like being in harmony with Tao. Tao is simply the natural rhythm of the universe; it's not something you control, but rather, something you live in harmony with.

I feel it's possible for people to find love outside the twin soul connection, and even have happy love experiences on the earth. I think it's important to know that while twin souls certainly have a beautiful and divine connection of love, they are not superior to other kinds of love in this universe.

On the other hand, some twins feel more happy and at peace staying with their counterparts in spirit, in a spiritual marriage, because the bond is so deep, they don't really want to leave them. I think that's okay, too. Everyone's journey and experience is different. If you feel happy and at peace loving your twin soul in spirit, then you don't have to change yourself or try to force yourself to fit in with others in society.

It's not about comparisons, because we all have special gifts and experiences that are just right for us on our own personal journeys.

Jimi told me in spirit, "It's all an individual thing, and that's what a lot of people don't understand. They start making comparisons, and then they start getting jealous and thinking, 'Well, why don't I have what he has?' But it's not about comparisons; it's about living your life with God, and doing something groovy and, you know, meaningful while you're on the earth. When you get to the next world, all the petty stuff doesn't matter. It's all spiritual, it's all within... you know, it's all about God, it's all about love, and it's all about a purpose."

In the afterlife, spiritual titles and labels don't really matter that much. Spirits connect at heart levels, because spiritual worth is all that truly matters there. Everyone can have a purpose and a meaningful life, whether they have a twin soul or not. I personally believe that God has a beautiful soul-mate or spiritual partner for every person on the earth who wants to experience true, unconditional love, and if people don't find their spiritual partners while they are on the earth, they can surely find them in the afterlife.

Anyway, the rules don't really matter in a twin soul experience. No one has the right to say who's a "true twin flame" and who is not, unless you somehow have ultimate knowledge - and no one has ultimate knowledge while we are on the earth. Even in the afterlife, we still grow and learn as we go. And everyone's individual spiritual experience, including the twin soul experience, will be unique.

 
Appreciate the Love You Have, and Give Instead of Get

The best thing to do, in my opinion, is appreciate the love you have! Don't get too caught up in whether he's your twin flame or not. Give your brain a break from trying to figure it out. I know it's easier said than done, but it really does help to let go of basically nearly all of the mainstream twin flame info out there. I haven't found much of it helpful, and the sooner you let go of who's the runner and the chaser, and so on and so forth, the better you will start to feel.

The longer I've been on this journey, the more my view of twin souls has both expanded and simplified. I've expanded my views of twin souls to include twin soul friendships, mentor and student connections, creative partners, and so on. At the same time, I've simplified my view of twin souls to simply two souls who share the same spiritual essence and an unconditional love. It's really that simple. Even though parallel lives and similarities are a common trait of twin souls, twin souls don't have to fit into a rule book. Everyone's personal journey is unique.

I feel you save yourself a lot of pain when you don't obsess or try to search for your twin soul. Usually these experiences happen when the time is right, and your twin may be in spirit instead of being on the earth, so that's something you may have to accept, too. You really have to be mature enough and ready enough to handle this kind of experience. It's not just about falling in love and being happy forever; there's a lot of spiritual growth and learning involved, too, and as time goes on, you're generally led to a path where you want to give instead of get. You want to give back something that can benefit and help others. It's not all about "me, me, me."

This doesn't necessarily mean you have to share your twin soul story publicly; that's a personal choice which is up to you. But you can surely use the inspiration from your experience to help others, and let the twin soul experience lead you to becoming more spiritually mature, humble, and helpful.


Submitted: March 08, 2021

© Copyright 2021 Autumn Wells Wisdom. All rights reserved.

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LE. Berry

Thought filled piece Autumn...

Fri, March 12th, 2021 10:13pm

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Thank you very much! I really had a lot of thoughts about it, especially since the twin flame concept has become so popular in our culture. Thank you for commenting!

Sat, March 13th, 2021 9:27am

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