What Ifs?

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

What Ifs of My Long Life.

What Ifs?:


What if My Family and I Never Moved to Farmington?

Grade school would’ve been Musson, the Van Hoosen MS, and Rochester Adams HS. Aunt Potti would’ve been stopping over at least weekly, and Piglet, Humphrey, and I would’ve been under a less strict school system. Auntie Winnie the Queen Pug wouldn’t have gotten the chance to babysit any of us three--no Winnie to watch over us=(!!! Church from very beginning would continue to be Saint Irenaeus instead of Fabian, no FB priest though.


What if Anything College had Never Been Required for Priesthood?

I still would have attempted college to try it out and possibly further my education. After struggling, I’d have talked about going to Blessed Sacrament Parish to sign up for becoming Fr. Jonathan for 50 or so years. King Tigger and Winnie would have started to develop more of a bond with crazy and good Wario Jr. with no RC around.


What if Uncle Backson Lived to be 100?

He’d have been mildly his aggressive self, but stop the pinching butt nonsense to me and Piglet. Winnie’s 2016 death would result in him seeing us at least a few more times for Holidays and Birthdays, alongside other playful cousins.


What if Piglet Never Got Full-Blown Autism?

On nearly every level, things would be 100% different. He’d go to normal schooling, be a more mature character in my parodies, likely be in my grade and middle school or even university classes, and would never EVER be deemed as cutest thing in our galaxy--no best friend here.


What if King Tigger Wed Original Crush?



What if Humphrey the Owl Never Married Gerardo?



What if “A Dickie?!” Daddles Lived at Least Several More Years?



What if I Never Became one of Ten XC Captains?



What if I Never Got Autism?



What if I Never Joined XC?



What if Humphrey the Owl Got PlayStation I or II, or Sega Dreamcast Instead of Nintendo 64?



What if I Never Discovered Anything with James Rolfe/ AVGN?



What if I Never Discovered Winnie’s Winnieness?



What if Woozle Queen Lived After 2005?



What if Pom Pom Didn’t Go Out with Johnny 2x4?



What if Piglet Never Got “Hercules” DVD?



What if My Family and I Moved to South Carolina in Summer 2003?



What if Piglet and I Never Went to Midland High School?



What if Padme Conner Started Dunckel in Sixth Grade?




Submitted: May 26, 2021

© Copyright 2021 JonathanSluty. All rights reserved.

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Guide / Non-Fiction

Script / Humor