Storage-Sheds and Stuff

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

This story started out to be about storage sheds, where it went from there is suspiciously vexing.

It is just a Wooden Shed, eight feet wide and ten feet long.

Some people use them for children's play houses, others use them as a place to keep gardening equipment or household tools, or both.

But not this Empty Nest-er Family, no, as soon as the kids were up, out, and established we sold the big house and bought a smaller home.

Our former home had an extra wide garage so I built shelves along the walls to store extra stuff. Unfortunately, the smaller house's garage has no such room on one side, and only about half the room on the other side; ah, say-la-vie.

You see, at the time we moved into this house my wife and I were still working and my wife just happened to be a grade-school teacher.

And after we moved into the new place my wife took inventory of her storage needs, and in doing so she decided that we needed a good solid wooden shed with an extra wide door. "You know," she said, "a shed that will last."

Whenever my wife was assigned to teach a different grade, other than what she had been teaching, well, that required moving to another classroom.

Changing from teaching one grade to another, which happened every two or three years, was always a hassle. Out came the stuff she needed for the new grade and stored away went the stuff she didn't need any longer.

I have to admit, her teacher stuff only took up about half of the interior space of the new shed. But then there was the Christmas decorations, the fold-up tree, boxes of assorted lights, and household furnishings that didn't fit in the new place, but things she couldn't part with because we might need them again, someday.

 

Anyway, I was thinking that when we bought this shed I could put some garden things in there; like the lawn mower, the wheelbarrow, and some trimming tools.

But when all was said and done, I was left with enough room to stack plastic tubes holding tax papers and photo albums, that's all.

Well, being the handy and resourceful person that I am, I built a open-sided Lean-To on the back of the shed, and that is where the garden stuff found shelter from the rain.

The Lean-To also provided an unintended nesting place for a few bird each spring; why they don't use the trees that are all around us, I have no clue.

 

Alas, years have passed and my wife has retired from that noble but often thankless profession. And in due time she has managed to rid herself of all her teaching stuff.

Yet, a curious thing has taken place. The shed is just as full as it was before the teaching stuff went away; in fact, there may be more stuff in there than there was before (?).

My wife is really good about getting rid of what she's not using, well, you know, if it's not stuff that she uses in her hobbies. And with every new hobby she takes classes so she knows what she's doing.

My wife is a long time quilter, and she was into plaster figurines for awhile. More recently she has taken up water colors and oil painting, along with class instructions, of course.

These hobbies require goodly amounts of stuff to do the job, and she must have those things on hand and at the ready, you know, should inspiration strike.

So, you see, I suspect that her Hobby Stuff has taken the place of her Teacher Stuff, and that is why the Shed is still full of more Stuff.

 

As for me, I've done more than my part in eliminating my kind of Stuff after I retired.

For instance, when the drought hit California I had an artificial lawn put in. So not only does that cut our water usage in half, it did away with the need for the lawn mower and lawn trimming devices that I needed to use every week.

After the new lawn was installed I noticed that there was so little left to care for, so I tossed out my other gardening tools and I hired a gardener to come in twice a month, you know, just to keep the rest tidy.

Well, after that was done I was a free man; no more shed storage problems for me. And as far as the Lean-To was concerned, except for one wheelbarrow and the temporary bird's nests each spring, it was empty.

 

All good thing come to and end, or so they say. So when a couple of years had passed, I was greeted with a big surprise.

First, the Lean-To developed a rotting wood problem and I had to make repairs, it was either that or tear the Lean-to down.

Well, repairing the Lean-To was the simplest thing to do, so that's what I did. And I estimated that the repair would take one day.

It would also require a five foot long 2'X 2', which I already had on hand and it was stored in the rafters of our garage.

I needed some screws, too, but I had lots of them squirreled away at my work bench; surly I would have the right sizes.

Three days later and two trips to the hardware store, the Lean-To was all fixed; it should be good for another few years.

 

Now, today, my wife has told me that the door to the shed won't close without her wrestling with it, and at her age wrestling with doors is something she shouldn't be doing.

She knows me pretty good, she knows that if the Tax Papers and Photo Albums weren't in there, well, I'd just tell her to leave the door a-jar and not to worry about it; but I didn't.

I took a closer look at the Shed and I must admit that I can see maintenance problems that have been left unattended.

And as far as the door closing, I'll bet those cheep galvanized hinges are the problem. I mean, after all, the shed's only 20 years old and steel hinges should last forever. --- Right?

 

The Shed could use a fresh coat of paint, maybe even some patching, hear and there, you know, before the painting begins.

With all the classes my wife has taken regarding the use of plasters and paints, and with all the plaster, paints, and brushes she has stored away, I'm sure she won't have any problem taking care of the problems that the shed has.

And once she unloads all the plasters, paints, brushes, and other artsy stuff from the Shed, maybe the door will close again. --- I'm just say-in.

 

 

D. Thurmond / JEF

05-28-2021

 


Submitted: May 29, 2021

© Copyright 2021 D. Thurmond aka JEF. All rights reserved.

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Comments

Vance Currie

It's always a pleasure to read your stories, DT. Who else could make such an entertaining story out of a shed?

Sat, May 29th, 2021 10:35pm

Author
Reply

Thanks Vance. ... The whole idea started while I was thinking about a Shed as the stage for a murder mystery; --- It was a foggy night when Henry looked out his back doorway at the muted green light that was seen in the window of the Garden Shed. "Who's in the Shed?" he wondered as the light changed from pale green to a florescent blue.
I was thinking, "Madness in the Garden Shed?" as a title.
But I was pressed for time, I'm trying to rehang the door on my own shed, so this little ditty came about.

Sun, May 30th, 2021 3:15pm

Ann Sepino

A very fun and relatable story! The wife reminds me of a certain relative of mine who keeps stuff in our backyard 'just in case.' One time, I found a sack of old, rusty doorknobs out there. You can probably guess what their response was when I asked if I could dispose of the stuff. XD

Sun, May 30th, 2021 1:57pm

Author
Reply

Thanks Ann. --- I can guess what they said about tossing out the rusty door knobs, "What, Toss out "Antique Hardware?" to the right person they are worth their weight in silver! And someday I'll find that "Right Person." LOL

Sun, May 30th, 2021 2:53pm

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