I'm Afraid

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic

A poem I wrote about how a wench becomes fond of one of her clients and contemplates in fear about what'll happen when he leaves her.

'Someday when you leave me, I bet these memories follow you around.'

- Taylor Swift, Wildest Dreams

 

A truly wretched woman

Filling her wretched pockets

off of people’s desperation

Damsels like me

are ten a penny

is what they dared to tell me.

 

I found someone nonetheless

my first patron

I was his one-month mistress.

 

Then another

and another

and another

Until one summer night

you held my hand tight

led me to the candlelight

All seemed alright.

 

You jested

You smiled

You slept

I slept

You told me about your

preceding heartbreaks

 

“I broke their hearts

and they broke my facade.”

Your words left me

disheartened

but not stunned.

 

You started arriving late

You stopped taking the bait

I gave you the benefit of doubt

But now, I’m afraid.

 

I’m afraid of what’ll happen

when your thirst has been quenched,

when you won’t need me anymore

when you won’t want me again.

Where will I go?

 

I’m afraid that you’ll

find a new plaything,

perhaps a more lustrous one.

But darling, that is hardly what

I envy

and if anything, ’tis

your audacity to shatter hearts like cheap glass

and move past so briskly.

 

I knew I couldn’t hang

on to you

It’s about “when”

and not “if”

You are like a leaf in a storm

destined to crumple and fly away

And it doesn’t matter if I’m afraid.

 

 


Submitted: May 31, 2021

© Copyright 2021 Deli. All rights reserved.

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