Rolling Hills

Reads: 1129  | Likes: 2  | Shelves: 1  | Comments: 6

Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

It was obnoxious the way hills rolled


You hated the way hills rolled, like a babbling baby’s tummy.

It was so obnoxious of them, how they just kept going and going and going, a never-ending spillage of grass and dirt and rocks.

They couldn’t just end, could they?

Maybe, down in one of the valleys, they would look like a towering mass of absolute waste. That’s really what these were, rolling hills of waste. They served no purpose except looking pretty, and they couldn’t even do that without being arrogant.

There really was no point to you still sitting up here, surrounded by these disagreeable rocks. You should just leave and return to the campsite.

Except he’s not back.

What if one of the mounds of dirt had captured him?  What if they were dragging him deep into their depths and smothering him in layers of silt to prepare him for a sacrifice?

They would do that; you could tell just by looking at them they would do that. It was how the hills peaked tremendously, then dragged down, falling deeper into the shadows that sat in the valleys. A sliver of a chill was creeping around, and vehemently you shook it off.

The hills were not going to be satisfied today. Maybe if you went down there, bravely accepted the challenge to defy all odds; he’d be there. Defiantly you rise.

“Hey?”

The sudden noise makes you start.

He’s here. He’s back.

“I thought you’d be at the campsite,” he says. “It’s getting dark.”

He hasn’t been made into a sacrifice for the rolling hills.

“I was just, looking at the view.”

He smiles. “The hills are pretty aren’t they?”

Maybe he actually had been turned into a sacrifice and regurgitated. Or maybe you were just worried.

“Kind of.”

Either way, the hills were still obnoxious.

 



Submitted: July 23, 2021

© Copyright 2023 Archia. All rights reserved.

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Comments

ratwood2

I like the image of the hills and the tie into the story, but thought the story would be more powerful if written in first person.

Mon, July 26th, 2021 2:38pm

Author
Reply

I haven't written first person in a very long time, but I may tweak it a little and see how it goes. Thanks very much for your feedback

Mon, July 26th, 2021 3:37pm

DiyaSL

Great story Archia =)
As ratwood said, the image of the hills is well described. A little creepy though. The thoughts of the person in the story, waiting for him was heart touching. The relationship is shown in a nice way with her thoughts.
-Good luck with the future writings :)

Sun, September 5th, 2021 3:13am

Author
Reply

Thanks so much for reading. I'm glad you liked the imagery, and it was a little creepy.

Sat, September 4th, 2021 9:17pm

FD6K

I like the light touch, Archia. Understated. Much to enjoy in your writing.

Fri, October 8th, 2021 10:07pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much.

Fri, October 8th, 2021 6:25pm

CM.N

When I finished reading, I was like...did you have something against the hills? Did they harmed you somehow? I was so into it, I thought they were really alive, like a monster, waiting for you to trip yourself. I really enjoyed reading it. It was fun to look at the hills from your perspectives. It was true though. Hills can be dangerous at time. They are beautiful but dangerous. Very well written Archia. I was pulled into the story.

Tue, October 19th, 2021 4:40am

Author
Reply

Thank you so much. I did want to make the hills seem alive so I'm so glad you saw it that way.

Tue, October 19th, 2021 4:24pm

Damon Nomad

Clever simple piece, turning the scenery into action.

Mon, March 28th, 2022 11:24pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much.

Fri, April 15th, 2022 5:01pm

charlamaye

Beautiful

Thu, March 31st, 2022 2:17am

Author
Reply

Thank you very much.

Fri, April 15th, 2022 5:02pm

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