The Year of Dilemmas!

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

Its a sundry of thoughts that visited my mind in 2013, during the final year of my Engineering Graduation and roughly deals with the insecurities and dilemmas that a final year Indian Engineering Graduate from a private engineering college goes through. Needless to mention, its my personal opinion.

People say adolescence is a difficult place to be, try the final year of an engineering degree.

It’s a year of dilemmas, where all our plans and dreams are at stake. All our learning is under scrutiny and our lives are about to get triggered. The pickup depends on the nature of the effort we send to our brain, and its efficiency of execution. It’s not easy to emerge terrific from the amount of assistance we are greeted with, but then friends, life itself aint easy. All we need is a little of additional effort, a bit of extended patience and now or some time in near future, even we will be in condition well-established, and a workplace much lucrative…Touchwood!

It’s the final year of engineering where we realize that the world is not a very pleasant place to be in. Albeit there is no visible compulsion on us to prove ourselves extraordinary, but still that inbuilt self-esteem and that inexorable human tendency to feel bad when we are left behind doesn’t let it be an easier time to pass by. We are here, all the time, muddled with our career plans, our potential and our circumstances, blah….there are so many!

It’s here when we realize that the party is about to get over, and there isn’t really any time for the hangover either. We need to adapt at a pace we are not used to as in a matter of a few months there is a rigorous transition demanded which we either have to fetch or we will be left behind in this race called life.

There are two words, ‘optimism’ and ‘repudiation’ which if we examine, are very closely associated with an engineering graduate in his final year, especially if he is not tagged with one of those brand names of IIT, NIT etc.

An entire ‘tenure of engineering’ corresponds to our very life-cycle itself in a peculiar fashion.

In the first year, we are ignorant and eager like a child, in the second, development starts and we start exploring, like a teenager do, different things of course, in the pre-final year, realization and self-estimation starts striking our minds, like an emerging youngster in his early 20s exploring the possibilities of this immense universe, and then we enter the grand one, final year, quite overrated though, where we have to face the harsh realities and yet have to find the remedy, like a responsible human being with all the liabilities out there, waiting for their execution.

Now coming back to ‘Optimism’ part of where we belong to currently, it’s a handy virtue, but the deficit with it lies in the fact that it is somewhat like those typical theorems of science involving several assumptions and thus rarely applicable in the real world. We need to understand that optimism can only console us in our adverse times; it doesn’t possess the competence of rescuing us from hardship. We have to be smart enough to judge the tone of the changing patterns of excellence and the amendments required to remain in the race. Being hopeful is good, but being hopeful and sitting idle is a crime, which we often commit, riding on the support of banal excuses, supplemented by the useless thought that fate played its part, quite prominently,  in deciding our destiny.

One thing is certain, luck does play its part, but its efficiency increases rapidly if the end results are our downfall, beware! 

The second term which I mentioned, ‘Repudiation’, it’s a fancy term for running away or being ignorant towards the obvious repercussions of the activities we are currently involved in, on our future. There is a direct relationship in what we do and what we get, within the limits of deviations based on fortune, so there hardly exists any room for being unaware and presenting it as an excuse for the fiasco. All we need to do is to make an honest effort, and thereafter, let the 'deviating constant' play its role, and I guess the result on the Right Hand Side of that equation would, perhaps, be favorable. Negligence arises from the realization that the things have gone beyond our control and this is a stage where hopelessness flourishes, a sure-shot thing to avoid.

So, it’s a better option to face our complications, ponder and analyze them, and arrive at a solution rather than simply being ignorant towards them, as these are neither transferrable, nor have an expiry, they will hang around until we deal with them, no other alternate indeed! 

Now that it has been said, let’s come to the realistic part of the notion, i.e. real-life execution. It’s not like I have inscribed anything out of the box or utterly firsthand, neither it is that I am the only person with this frustration building inside each and every day, and yes all of us, on our levels are trying to create our own vibes, but the thing is that, these two practices mentioned beforehand, belong to one of those ‘easier said than done’ category and their honest implementation is the tedious part.

Superiority-Complex is an intrinsic tendency of homo-sapiens, we just can’t deny it. We may play jolly and we may play blatant, we might even convince others of our sheer casual and inert attitude, but at the end of the day, it’s a true fact, that humiliation hurts us all, disrespect depresses one and all, and criticism for a moment does bring a dismal appearance on our faces. In such a well-defined and pre-programmed thought process, it is but natural to feel inferior when we see our contemporaries reaching great heights in these high times when we are striving even for a mediocre opportunity. 

In addition to that, what kills is that never expressed yet utterly manifested expectations of so many faces! It’s our life, but at this point of time, we come to realize that the picture is much bigger, it’s not just our life and our business, we owe so much to so many, and it’s the payback time! Of course, people don’t demand straightaway on our faces, but then there's this thing called sense of responsibility which is expected to develop in oneself, as we advance in our lifespan. Even if our parents spare us from this peer pressure, it’s our so-called well-wishers in a long queue out there waiting for us to deliver, needn’t to say, in a fascinating manner!

We are in a place where even the guidance of professionals is of little help, as in this ever-changing scenario, what was trendy yesterday, gets obsolete today.

In such a set-up, all we are left with is our intellect, experience and ‘destiny’ to pave the flyover of our career. We are hazy about which career choice to opt for, indeed even at this stage, obscure in recognizing our true interest, as we want ‘power, paisa and peace’ all at the same time.

Adjusting in such a landscape and properly balancing our potential with our plans is what is required ideally, seldom achieved though!

The understanding part keeps on diminishing. Let it be your partner, your friends, relatives, parents, or eventually your own inner self, everyone is asking the same question, “What If?” I hope this ‘what if’ doesn’t turn into reality in any of our lives, and I am pretty sure that if not outstanding at least a satisfactory stature can be achieved by the way we are progressing, a bit of optimism here too! 

Courtesy: the hardcore attitude of my peers, classmates and friends, the vigor and self-reliance in me is still alive that “If anyone can, why can’t we?” Life is all about failing, learning and improving. Now that the first two parts have already been exercised in enormous amounts, we are left with no other option but to improve, and that is precisely the need of the hour.

For the time being, all we need to do is to carry on the good work, for I have been here for the three odd years and in that time what I have witnessed is a collection of several mind-boggling personas, undoubtedly victims of misfortune to be not in a condition better than that prevailing.

College makes us realize how people turn into well-determined individuals, how a teenager transits into a responsible citizen and believe me, I have been in touch with many of the so-called superior brains, they are not pole-apart from us. All they were better at was playing smart on those critical stages and delivered, it’s our time now.

Gratefulness to almighty for rendering me the company of such associates which are brimmed of self-belief propelling healthy competition of growth and endeavors.

All that we can is attempt, so let’s organize it with full intensity and thereafter, leave the rest to the creator, for in that case, even if our results are underrated, at least that feeling of self-satisfaction will keep us alive that we did try honestly, and that's important, as it will not let that self-reliance to leave our attitude and we will prosper today, tomorrow or perhaps later, but for sure! 


Submitted: September 26, 2021

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