Time and Time Again

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: The House of Imagination

Featured Review on this writing by Lorraine Carey

This is a speculative fiction about our purpose in life, the rebirth of the soul, the possibility of an afterlife, and past life memories.

Searing pain squeezed my chest as I struggled to breathe. Please let it be over fast! I begged silently. I'm so tired.

As if my plea was answered, suddenly I was floating over my withered, old body. The pain was gone, and I was finally free. My earthly feelings of jealousy, hate, pity, and vanity peeled off and left only acceptance, serenity, and love in my soul.

The tranquil feeling enveloped me as if I was wrapped in a comforting blanket. Basking in the bright, colorless light, I floated up in a wide tunnel. My memories slowly surfaced and by the time I reached the end of the tunnel and floated into the beautiful gathering place, I remembered every single lifetime I lived.

"Welcome home Tiana," the familiar, soft voice in my head greeted me with the first name that was given to me so long ago. A large group of souls surrounded and greeted me with a loving embrace. Their gentle touch gave me pure joy. I saw my parents of many lifetimes along with my children, relatives, and friends.

"Finally, you’re home," came the thought of my soulmate from the crowd. The souls parted to make way for him. "I’ve been waiting for you."

"I missed you so much, Joland," I projected my thoughts. "I couldn’t find you in my last lifetime, and I was so lonely without you."

"My last physical life was too short, only twelve earthly years," he sent me his loving thoughts and longing vibes. "I love you so much! Come, I have so many memories to share with you."

We floated toward our beautiful, comfortable home where we always spent our resting periods while waiting to be reborn again.

Finally, after spending a long life without him, we had a chance again to embrace in the purest form of lovemaking. We held each other in silence, floating in the warm light and enjoying our reunion.

"How was your life, my love? Would you show me?" Joland asked.

"It was too long," I showed him a mental picture of my last life.

My short childhood years were uneventful, so I started with my wedding day that was a sad occasion. My parents forced me into an arranged marriage. My husband was a stranger to me, and I didn’t love him, but I learned to respect him over the years. We struggled and he worked very hard to provide for our growing family. He died in the war, and I was left alone to raise ten children. Sadly, after all that struggle and hard times, I outlived them all. I died alone in a nursing home.

"Sorry, love. My last, short life wasn't happy either," Joland replied sadly.

He showed me a mental picture of a young boy who was abused by his brother from the time he turned six. On his twelfth birthday, he gathered enough courage and strength to resist, but his brother was close to overpowering him, again. In the struggle to defend himself, he grabbed his brother’s hunting knife and stabbed him to death. His father was heartbroken over the death of his favorite firstborn and shot Joland in the heart, killing him.

We recalled happier lives for a while and then a group of souls we've connected with through so many lifetimes and resting periods, came over to visit us.

"How have you been since I’ve last seen you in Egypt?" I contrived my question to Kira, who was a cook in King Tut's court where I was a dressmaker, and Joland had been in charge of the servant quarters. 

Kira replied, "We keep missing each other, don't we? Let me tell you about my last lifetime. Although I was born to a rich family and had a chance to travel a lot and study, I kept bumping into brick walls in the men's world. I found out a lot about how the human body works and learned herbal medicine from healers. But I was not allowed to enter medical school because I was a woman." She showed us a mental picture of her travels in many European countries when she visited healers, shamans, and medicine women. Then she continued with a bitter tone of her voice, "I became a midwife but when the doctors who believed in bloodletting as the only form of medicine, found out that I've been using herbs to heal people, they declared me incompetent and locked me up in a mental asylum. I died there, years later."

"So sorry, Kira," I tried to console my friend.

“It’s okay but under different circumstances, I could have earned my permanent stay here. Well, maybe next time. Oh, I hope you don’t mind me inviting Sandor,” she pointed toward soul floating alone by the window.

“Of course, I don’t mind. Who’s he?”

“He’s been a permanent since the 1840s, but he’s kind of a loner and doesn’t make friends easily. You see, in all his lifetimes, that happened to be wartimes every time, he was destined to be the sickly, weak underdog. He couldn’t fight, but in his last lifetime, he wrote a poem that moved an entire nation and led them to victory.”

“Wow! I never knew writing a poem would be enough to earn permanent stay,” I mused and then spotted my dear friend in the crowd. “Have you met Gertrude?” I asked Kira.

“No, but I see she’s a permanent. How did she earn it?”

“She invented the first vaccine that protects people from developing autoimmune conditions. I wish I could achieve something similar in my next life.”

“Yes, me too,” Kira projected her words.

We mingled, socialized, enjoyed each other’s company, and learned from each other’s earthly experiences. Later we played our favorite games, listened to music, and went to see a play. Although we don't measure time in our resting periods, this time Joland and I had a longer than usual time together. We spent the time enjoying the pure happiness that only soulmates have a chance to experience.

"I hope in our next earthly lives we could be together and do something that’d earn our permanent stay." he wished.

"Me too,” I agreed. “I hope we will be born at least on the same continent so we could have a chance to meet,” I replied. “But let's not waste time worrying. Let's enjoy what we have."

We did enjoy the tranquility and pure happiness for a long time, but then the familiar voice sounded in our minds, "Tiana, Joland, it's time for both of you to go."

"Can we stay for just a little bit longer?" I begged.

"No, you know the rule," the stern voice replied in my mind. "Both of you must go back until you do something worthy in one of your lifetimes. Then you can reunite and stay together for eternity."

I embraced Joland, and I felt his thoughts and feelings of pure love. "Until we meet again," were his last words.

***

They were dragged by a force they couldn't fight. Tiana found herself in a familiar, comfortable place floating in warm liquid. She heard muffled, reassuring rhythmical thumping sounds that lulled her into a long, blissful sleep.

Woken from her sweet slumber, suddenly, Tiana found herself struggling to push her way through a dark, narrow, and very tight tunnel. Please, let us both find our purpose in life this time. She thought, picturing Joland’s lovely face in her mind, as she wiggled her small body free and fought to take her first, painful breath. She tried to hold onto her memories, but slowly, everything faded away.

© Erika M Szabo, 2021


Submitted: October 03, 2021

© Copyright 2021 Erika M Szabo. All rights reserved.

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Comments

Lorraine Carey

This was a very moving piece. I truly do believe in past lives and we keep returning to this earth until we have earned the right to move to the higher realm. First thing I read this morning. Looking forward to more pieces like this one.

Sun, October 3rd, 2021 10:58am

Erika M Szabo

I've been a skeptic for a long time, but I've sat by too many dying patients throughout my nursing career, and I've seen things that made me a believer, Lorraine

Sun, October 3rd, 2021 2:59pm

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