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Wonderfull first chapter... realy make me want to read the whole novel!!! you write REALY good... the way the chapter is written realy fits the scene. I hope that you get to the hights you realy can :D... btw... i just started writing, both ever and in booksie... i would realy like you to read and give me your opinion, be it as it may. I wish you ... Read More

Submitted on Mon, June 25th, 2012 1:07pm

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I can already see myself being sucked into a story like that!!! You do have some grammer problem, and a bit of misspellings, but you found yourself a REALY intresting looking start, so you can work the rest up!!! wish you luck in the rest of your (hopefully extended) writing career!!! -- Black N --

Submitted on Mon, June 25th, 2012 10:37am

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I agree with the former comment, but have something in addition to say. first of all, wonderfull story. realy touching. it does move too fast, but that can be worked on... hell, my (few) own works also does that sometimes. you need to work on your punctuation a bit... you dont break sentences when u often need to. all in all, a WONDERFULL work, wi... Read More

Submitted on Sun, June 24th, 2012 11:12am

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