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This is one of the best poems i've read. It was very emotional, and well written, i felt my heart just drop, and my chest pained. I love the hope in the last passage. This is just exceptional. Great job!

Submitted on Thu, March 31st, 2016 12:25am

Personally, I would have put more detail into her appearance (not all that important) and events lead up to the main event. such as more on her thoughts when he pinned her down, or even how he looked at her ect. Now, you didn't say if he was a beggar like her, or a well off person, either way, it would be more realistic that she would have struggl... Read More

Submitted on Wed, March 30th, 2016 8:07pm

This was fantastic!! The imagery was ahh-mazing!! I wish there was a lil more detail to Erin and her brother. BUt anyway, this was fantastically written and a great back story. As EverAfterDarling said I too can see it becoming a great intersting Novel. Geeat work!!

Submitted on Mon, February 23rd, 2015 2:33pm

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