A Collection of Brief Essays on Various Social and Moral Topics

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Chapter 9 (v.1) - A Message to Teenaged Girls Who are Insecure About Their Bodies

Submitted: December 13, 2011

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Submitted: December 13, 2011



A Message to Teenaged Girls Who are Insecure About Their Bodies

First of all, I do not believe in helping people to delude themselves into thinking that they are more awesome than they really are. The human male has evolved to perceive as beautiful certain physical traits which, in a human female, are indicators of physical health and of reproductive fertility. These are the characteristics which physically enable women to fulfill their primary responsibility to the human species, which is to say the act of giving birth to the next generation of people. Therefore, I do believe that physical beauty in women ought to be valued, not because it is beautiful, but rather, because it indicates good health. Likewise, a lack of physical beauty in women ought to be regretted, not because it unbeautiful, but rather, because it indicates poor health. For instance, morbid obesity is a bad thing not because it looks bad, but because it carries a great many health risks (diabetes, joint problems, poor circulation, and a wide variety of coronary diseases). The fact that obesity LOOKS bad is nothing more than an evolutionary adaptation to the fact that it would be a bad thing ANYWAY, regardless of whether it looked bad or not. I therefore believe that to tell someone that they are beautiful when they are actually not, both is unwise and may likely do them a disservice. After all, I do not think that telling someone that they are beautiful when they are not is very likely to amend the underlying health issues which prevent them from appearing beautiful. It is more likely that they will continue to suffer from the exact same health problems, regardless of whether they feel beautiful or not:


In contrast, when someone who is fat is made aware that they are fat and is ashamed of it, I believe that although that shame may feel bad at the moment, it often benefits such a person greatly in time, by motivating them to take better care of their bodies. Without the aforementioned shame, I expect that a great many more people in the developed world would allow themselves to grow very fat, and would therefore suffer from all of the various illnesses which coincide with being especially fat. Thus, although we are often told that we need to constantly feel good about ourselves no-matter what, nonetheless, it is entirely possible to grow very fat, being fat is inherently self-destructive, and I believe that a certain amount of the aforementioned shame is necessary in order to compel certain people to take better care of themselves:


The above image is a prime example of someone who clearly needs to take better care of herself, and who ought to be most ashamed of what she has allowed herself to become. Thus, you see that obesity is a very real problem in the world, and one which certainly needs to be dealt with. However, all of the above having been said, I have found that only a very small handful of girls are actually fat. Some girls actually are hideously and grotesquely fat, but only a small fraction of them. The number of girls who THINK that they are fat but who are ACTUALLY very beautiful, is much greater. For instance, look at the girls in the following class photograph from an American university:


Those girls may be a lot of things, (conceited, self-glorifying, undisciplined, lascivious, and probably drunk ...) yet whatever else they may be, none of them is fat. They're all perfectly beautiful. (They're beautiful on the outside, I mean. I doubt if any of them is nearly so beautiful on the inside …) Despite this, I believe that most girls have a deeply rooted and largely instinctive fear of being fat, of being ugly, or of being otherwise unattractive to boys. I believe that this is also deeply rooted in human evolution. As guys evolved to be more attracted to girls with certain physical characteristics which were indicators of good health, it was only natural that girls would evolve to want to make themselves more attractive to guys, so that it would be easier for them to find better guys to provide for them. I believe that it is, overall, a beneficial system. As I said before, I am certain that the fear of being fat does motivate a great many people who would otherwise let their bodies go to waste, to take much better care of themselves than they would otherwise do. Unfortunately, I believe that girls' natural fears of being fat are quite often inflated by certain aspects of society. For instance, the media is filled with images which glorify, much more so than is befitting, the beauty of only a small handful of very popular female celebrities, while giving little to no thought to all of the other women in the world. Perhaps even more significant than the media are the many young women, spread throughout every corner of society, who not only are outwardly beautiful, but also are convinced that outward beauty is the only thing which matters in life, and who therefore think that they must constantly show everyone how beautiful they are. (Think of the girls in the above photograph.) What such girls don't realize, (or perhaps they do realize it but just don't care) is that although everything in the physical world exists in fixed measures and quantities, (a three-story building is still a three-story building, regardless of whether the building beside it is one-story or thirty-stories.) nonetheless in the human mind, the value of everything is relative to the value of everything else which is connected therewith. (A three-story building would look very large if it was seen from up-close and there were no other buildings near to it, yet the same three-story building would look very small if it was seen from far away and was surrounded by massive skyscrapers.) In like manner, I expect that when girls who happen to be very beautiful also choose to advertise their beauty to everyone, it causes other girls who may be very beautiful in their own right but who have the humility not to prance about showing everyone how beautiful they are, to perceive themselves as being less beautiful by comparison.

(OK, I looked for a photograph to link to here, of some teenage girls who were attractive but nonetheless polite and modest, but I couldn't find any. When I searched for "teenage girls" on Google Images, I mostly found countless pictures of girls dressed provocatively and showing themselves off, and also a lot of porn, thus proving what I just said … : ( )

It also doesn't help matters that saying "ur fat!", "ur ugly!", "u stink!", or something similar thereto, appears to be the universal insult that girls always use to insult one-another whenever they can't think of anything intelligent to say ... : ( Thus, the unfortunate result is that although many people in the world truly are fat or even obese, many girls who are perfectly gorgeous and beautiful are nonetheless led to believe that they are grotesque, hideous and repulsive, such that they are woefully ashamed of nonexistent faults, and thus loath themselves without just cause. I have written this essay because Booksie appears to be a common hangout for depressed, self-hating young women. To my knowledge, I have never actually seen any of the depressed, self-hating young women who frequent this website. Therefore for all I know, some of you may very well be grotesquely fat and obese. However, it is statistically much more likely that you are actually very beautiful and merely don't realize it. Just remember the following truth:


What is more, if you are truly concerned about your physical appearance, self-destructive behaviors such as gorging yourself, starving yourself, cutting yourself, or other similar things, are not in any way beneficial. If you truly care about how you appear in the eyes of the boys, rather than fretting about your appearance, you need only to take care of your physical health. Once again, most all of the physical traits which human males have evolved to perceive as attractive in human females are traits which naturally result from good health. Therefore, if you simply take good care of your body, there should be no need for you to worry a great deal about your appearance. So long as you keep your body healthy, it should naturally appear beautiful to the males regardless of how much or how little you do in order to make it appear beautiful to them.

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