Chapter 2: Lifted up.

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Thrillers  |  House: Booksie Classic

Reads: 167

Have you ever felt alive? Well that’s a silly question, isn’t it? But for me it means far more than that.

The first thing I remember is darkness. Don’t know for how long, but it’s like I was always conscious of it, but I didn’t feel, I didn’t know.

I couldn’t move, it felt like I was strapped to a table. Now that I think about it, it felt like one of those horror movies I saw with Kelly. She sneaked to her father’s room and took a movie from it and we watched it. When her parents came back, she automatically went crying to her mother apologizing that she will never do it again. I was still at the sofa watching them hug and letting her know everything was to be ok.

Well in that movie that we watched, a man was strapped into a table in darkness, waiting for the inevitable moment that a man would come to cut him in pieces. The worst part, was that the man knew it was coming, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Now that I think about, I don’t want to be never be strapped somewhere and wait in despair. But at that moment I didn’t feel. Now that I do, if that were to happen again, I would snap. Not knowing when you are going to get out, what’s going to happen, how long have you been there, being driven to a point that you are just blank, completely empty like a vessel without a soul, or just driven plain old insane. Maybe this happen to me before, I just don’t remember.

I didn’t feel, I didn’t think. I just existed, without even knowing that I existed, I was just… there.

Don’t know how much time passed, don’t know when it happened, I just know that one day I finally felt something. I was, moving. Something had a hold of wherever in I was and took me. I could finally hear. My first sound was a loud bump into my cage. If you think about it, t felt like a gigantic monster picking your house up, and you are still inside. We got to a moment that I finally stopped moving. Couple of minutes later, I felt pressure around whatever hold me in. Like I was envelope on something.

For the first, I finally felt something.






I was again left to wait in darkness, until I could hear noises coming from outside. Different melodies and voices from what to me seemed like beasts. I didn’t know what was outside, and when they picked me up, I swear I almost moved on my own.

Then light, so bright that it blinded me for a little moment. My cage was opened and I was taken out from it. Believe me I was frightened, that until I was hold close to something. My vision starting to return and I could see a face. A being holding me up. I didn’t know what she was doing to me, but I didn’t fear anymore.

She was spinning me around. I was finally moving, not in my own, but I as free.


I could see,

I could hear,

I could feel,


I could…




Around me I saw others like hair, long haired, tall, small; other carried by what seemed taller version of the one that was carrying me. I understood they intended to me no harm.

She held me close, pushed me right into her chest and said this words

I love him!

Those words for some reason, made me feel something different. No longer inside a place, no longer trapped, but free, and this one showing me joy. I was happy.

Kelly, that’s how they were calling her. Kelly, it seemed to be what they called her. And those big brown eyes of her were the first thing I saw. And the way she looked was like she stared deep at meI felt good, like a warm feeling inside.

I wanted to jump in joy, I wanted to understand why I felt this way, but as happiness came into me, fear again came.

I couldn’t move. I was just a vessel, a puppet that needed someone to pull his strings. It was the same that I was in the box, I felt sad. I was not able to be. I looked and I saw them moving, jumping, playing.

And I…




Kelly then moved fast, shoved me around until we got into a room. And she turned me to her again. The same short person, with short brown hair and brown eyes wearing a pink jacket and jeans, But she was with me so, how could she be there as well.


  • That’s me, and that’s you  - she said.


Somehow I understood, she was actually not there, it was like a place were you could see yourself, and for the first time since I existed, I finally sw myself.


A white bunny toy, wearing a blue jacket, with deep black eyes. I did not have fingers, just nubs. I didn’t see it then but I had a white puffy tail behind me.

She was doing what I know now as smiling, she was showing me, me. She showed me that I was someone.

  • Do you like your present – said someone beside her.
  • I love him!
  • Are you going to name him


Name? That’s right, I didn’t have one.

Many of them were shouting names, some with can be called silly to an adult. But she had already picked one.

She lifted me up and said.

  • I already have a name for you, isn’t that right, Mare?


Mare. That was… my name. She smiled when she gave me my name, and ask me if I liked it


If I were like them, I would be crying, of happiness. I wished I could smile and let her know how much it meant to me.

All the fear,

All the sadness

Were washed away by this little girl, that didn’t just picked me up. She made me realize something, it didn’t matter that I couldn’t move, that I was just a toy. Nothing of that mattered anymore.

She made me feel alive. That I existed, that I was someone.


I had name, Mare.

I could see, and feel.

For this time, in whole life,



I was alive.

Submitted: July 23, 2015

© Copyright 2022 Arai. All rights reserved.


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