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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Horror  |  House: Booksie Classic

Elana has a couple of "friends" in her new Psych Ward: Lu, DD and Henry. She loves Henry and doesn't want him to go anywhere. Sheila, her therapist, tries to help her as much as she can. Elana doesn't know anything about her past or why she was here in the first place. Sheila tells her these horrible things, like: how her sister died, how she was there when her sister died. But she doesn't believe them. She couldn't believe those things. She didn't even have a sister, she thought. Elana doesn't want to lose Henry (and sometimes even Lu and DD) but Sheila tells her that that there isn't anything to lose. That she just made it all up. Elana knew Henry was real. She has seen him many times when she is asleep. Henry liked her. And she liked Henry.

Chapter 1 (v.1) - Henry

Submitted: October 06, 2013

Reads: 256

A A A | A A A

Submitted: October 06, 2013



Chapter 1: Fall


"Don't listen to her," Lu said, "she only wants you to believe you're fine.” Lu went on as Shelia continued to talk. Lu did not like Sheila that much and I dunno why. All Sheila wanted to do is help me and make sure I was doing well. That is why she brings me into this room every day for an hour; she makes sure I am still doing well. I’ve tried to tell that to Lu but he is so stubborn, I dunno how to handle him.

"Stop lying to yourself!" Lu yelled, "You know deep down all she wants to do is laugh at your failure."

"Yes! It's true, Elana. You are not important to her. She wishes you would leave just like your family did. You thought your family wanted you? Ha. Why do you think they sent you here? It wasn’t because they thought you were crazy. They wanted to get rid of such an awful child. They could not even stand to be in the same house as you, Elana." DD sprang in.

"Elana, sweetie? Are you paying any attention? Oh honey, are the voices back? Just ignore them and listen to my voice only okay?" Shelia spoke to me as she reached out to touch my arm. I didn't understand it, though. Why she was calling me sweetie or honey when she tries to get me to say all kinds of harsh things that are in my head. She once told me I needed to tell her that what I remembered about my sister dying. I think she is crazy because I don’t have a sister and I never did. It was just mum, dad and I, no sister or a brother. We didn’t even have family over really.

 She tells me that I've had a hard and troubling life but I don't know any of it; therefore, she tells me I need to think about those bad things. How can I think about those bad things when I don't remember any bad thing that happened to me? I don’t even remember when my birthday is. Everything to me was just hazy and slow moving for the past couple of weeks. Like I was dreaming and everything was only a faze.

I wanted to listen to her but was she really being honest to me? Henry told me that she was just lying to make me feel better. He said that she just wanted me to tell her everything about me so she could take it all away. What if she thought I was stupid? What if she didn't like me? Henry tells me these things in my sleep. Out of the three of them, Henry is really my only friend. He likes me and I like him.

I never told Shelia or anyone about Henry. I’ve told them about Lu and DD. Shelia told me that the voices were just thoughts that I had and that I couldn’t name them. When I talked about them she made me call them the voice, Lu, and voice two, DD. She said they wouldn’t be there anymore soon; she was going to give me candies to make them go away. I was happy about that because they were so mean to me. I don’t know how she said they could just be my thoughts when they were such mean things about me. Lu wasn’t as bad as DD but Lu was very aggressive. Lu and DD were nothing like Henry. Henry had a very smooth voice and I knew he wasn’t a thought because I see him all the time. He is there when I’m sleeping and I know it; however, Shelia said that I do not sleep much. I didn’t understand that, though. I do sleep, all the time and Henry tells me all kinds of things and crazy stories. The only reason I didn’t tell Shelia about Henry is because Henry said he was scared that Shelia would take him away from me. I didn’t want to lose him so I just kept it to myself.


* * * * * * * *

After I receive the two little pieces of white candy that Sheila gave me, she leads me into the lunch room. I haven't been able to go to the lunch room since I got here. Other people like Sheila would leave a tray at my door every day, three times a day. I never ate them most of the time, just play with the brick they called rolls. It tasted old and harden bread and always made me puke. I was a little afraid to go into the lunch room and see all the people that were going to be in there. I didn’t like people. Hopefully Henry will come and talk to me. I doubt that he will, though. He was really the only one I wanted to talk to. I didn't want to talk to Sheila because I didn't want to disappoint her. I would never remember what she wanted me to remember and I knew it hurt her every time.

The long white tables were all spaced apart: two near the windows and the other three across the middle of the room. None of them were less than 3 feet close together. Henry told me that was because some people did not do well when they were crowded together. The walls were a dull kind of white, nothing like the floors were. The floors were as squeaky as a new bath tub. If you stared at it long enough you would probably go blind. There were only a few people dressed like me in there and couple people dressed like Sheila. I didn't know why we were all dressed like this, so plain and not in our own style. Henry said it was to make sure no one gets treated differently and so people remain sane but I am not sure if I believe that. Wouldn't the people want us to all be different and to dress like ourselves? Be who we wanted to be? I dunno.

The outfits we had to wear when we arrived here were bright-yellow shirts-that read a number in the top right corner-and white, long pants. The pants were way too long for my scrawny, short legs. Everywhere I went you could hear them dragging across the floor. Swish. Swosh. Swish. Swosh.  When I arrived they told me they didn’t have any size smaller, but I didn’t mind it. I liked the feel of them.

Everyone here was wearing these white, strange looking sneakers as well. They didn't have shoelaces in them or anything else. They were just like a block. Henry told me it's so neither I nor anyone else will use them to do harmful things. I asked him what harmful things people could do with shoelaces-I didn’t think shoelaces could be harm to anyone-but he never answered me.

The numbers on our shirts were so the doctors knew what candy and what teacher - like Sheila - we belonged too. Sheila said that it was harder for them to remember by names, so they just gave us numbers. My number is 24.38. All of the numbers either end in a 38, 20, 45, or 44. Henry said that 38 was the best number out of them all. He said that number would allow me to do a lot more things than the other numbers.

"Elana you can sit where ever you like at this table. Just not any other table because it's your first time here. Are you hungry dear?" Shelia asked as she walked me to one of the tables near the windows. There wasn't anyone sitting here but a person that looked like Sheila at the end of the table.

"I guess," I said in a small voice as I took a seat. The seat sent a cold shiver up my spine and down my arms and legs. It was starting to get cold; fall and winter were coming soon and I couldn't wait. I looked up from the table to the window to catch a glimpse of a brownish - orange leaf falling. It was falling from a perfectly healthy tree. Only a few colorful leaves and the rest were a bright, healthy green color. I wish it was that easy and simple. To just let go when you were down and not well. To just fall down when you know everyone around you was still better and you were not.

"You know what you could do El. To just let go all you got to do is let me do my job," Lu came in, "just find me something I can use and I can take all of your pain away, Elana dear." Lu was like a creeping chill that grew from the back of my mind. He wasn't easy to get along with like Henry was. He always got his way or no way at all. That was until I got here. Now Lu only shows up a few times. Never as much as he used to; a couple of days a week.

"No you can't, I don't know why you keep saying that," I retorted. I brought my knees to my chest and leaned back against the cold window. It felt relaxing and calming against my burning skin. I didn't realize how warm it was in here until I felt the beam of sweat triple down my forehead.

"Ahh are you sure my love? You know how much joy it would bring you," he said. I knew I wasn't supposed to talk to him. Sheila said it would take me farther back in my process. She wasn't around though so I didn't really care. I wasn’t just going to let him win anymore. I had to stand up to him.

"Yes I'm sure! Just go away and let Henry be here!" I said to him with frustration. Henry was never like Lu. Henry is only here when I sleep though; I blame Lu and DD for that. I wish he was here as much as Lu was and talked to me as much as Lu did.

“Oh Henry doesn’t want to see you. He wants to watch you suffer and not get better, just like us all,” he hissed. I felt as if I could feel him clawing inside of my brain, trying to get me to let him back in again. I didn’t know why I wanted to help him in; I wanted him to go away not stay, right? Sheila told me a lot of things would be foggy until they eased up on the amount little candies I had to take. So I just decided to ignore the feeling that wanted him to stay.

“Henry wants to see me. He just doesn’t like people like you!” I spoke to him as I brought my hand up to wipe my forehead. It was really scorching in here.

“Better stop talking, dear. You know what Sheila will do,” Lu echoed through my head as I saw Shelia walking over from the corner of my eye; a tray full of food I didn’t want to eat in her hands. I didn’t want to have my privilege’s taken away before I even got the time to enjoy them. I just whispered to him before Sheila came to sit down,

“I didn’t want to talk to you anyways so just stop.” Sheila put the small tray of huge amounts of food on it in front of me as she sat down. There was enough food here to feed a whole apartment. One of the solid-rock-rolls, a huge mush of mashed potatoes, a ham sandwich that was smaller than the mashed potatoes and a milk carton on the side that was so cold if you shook it, you could hear the ice in it. There was no way I could even eat half of this but I knew I needed to look like I was doing well so I won’t go back in my progress. Shelia said I would be watched closely for the first couple of weeks, until I got used to being out of my room. I dunno if I liked being out of my room or not yet. It was defiantly scary and nerve racking but I think I kind of liked it.

“Thank you for the food, Mrs. Shelia,” I said to her as I reached for the spoon on the side. I took a small bite of the mashed potatoes, forcing myself to ignore their stale taste. I wasn’t even sure you could call this food. It was a huge pile of crap.

“Of course Elana. You have to experience what a real meal is on your first day in here,” she said with a smile, her full on teeth smile. When she smiled with her teeth, it wasn’t the prettiest sight. Her teeth were all crooked and the top left tooth overlapped the one next to it. So when she smiled with her teeth, you knew she was extremely happy. I’ve only seen her smiled while showing teeth two times: today and when she walked out of my room with Dr. Tompkins.

“When you finish I might even get 34.38 to tour you around the sites you are allowed to visit now. His name is Connor,” she said to me as she glanced around the room as if she were looking for someone. I didn’t want to walk around with anyone. I didn’t like people and people usually didn’t like me. I felt my stomach twist and turn and my hands tremble.

“Do I have to? I don’t know anyone and I don’t want to bother someone, Mrs. Shelia. You could just show me around right?” I said putting my spoon down, hoping she wouldn’t notice how much of the food I didn’t eat.

“Sweetie you need to make some friends here. You are progressing very well and you will be able to do more things soon. Wouldn’t you like to have people to do those things with?” She asked as patted my shoulder. She would always pat my shoulder or my thigh to console me but I didn’t find it very consoling.

“The person won’t like me though. He will hurt me, Shelia!” I said with a squeak in my voice, my breathing speeding up. I couldn’t function with the thought of being with another person, let alone a boy. I knew Sheila was going to find a way to convince me to go, she always does, so I had to think fast. Could I just say I wanted more food? I don’t know if I could eat another bite of it, though. Could I tell her I felt sick and wanted to sleep? No, she would make me go to Doctor and I would get in trouble for lying. Could I cause a big commotion and scream? Hmm.

“Elana no one is going to hurt you here. You are safe here; everyone here is to make sure you’re safe. Now let’s go introduce you to Connor, shall we?” She spoke in a level voice as she picked up my tray and went to throw it away. I was panicking and didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t do it; I just couldn’t go with someone that would hate me.

I knew this would probably put me back down in my room for a week and take away all my new privileges, but maybe that is what I wanted. Maybe I wasn’t ready to be out here with everyone else and communicate with everyone. I stood up on my two shaking legs and with a loud, screeching voice, I screamed.

“NOO! STOP IT! SHUT UP LU! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! I AM FINE WITHOUT YOU HERE! GET AWAY FROM ME!” I threw my hands in the air, swinging them around mindlessly and hitting myself multiple times. My eyes were closed and from the footsteps coming toward me I could tell my plan worked. I went to run toward the door-my eyes still closed because I couldn’t stand to see the look on everyone’s face- but my shin caught with the side of the table and I felt myself going down onto the table. This wasn’t supposed to happen. My head met with the seat connected with the table and I felt my body go still. I wasn’t nervous, I wasn’t scared, and I wasn’t burning hot anymore. I was cold and still.

© Copyright 2020 ashleynjb. All rights reserved.


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