Chapter 1: Save Me: Real-Life Journal

April 17th, 2012

My 16th Birthday

It's horrible that I'm so depressed on my birthday but lately that's the norm. I don't feel like I have many people to talk to. I feel as though my best friend is totally absorbed with her girlfriend, which I can understand I'd done the same with her when I'd gotten Daniel. But right now I need... and it's not as though I feel like I can't ask her to  help me or to listen to me. It's... she's changed and I don't know how much she'd really care.

I'm just so stressed with school, with home, with my friends.... my heart's a mess. The only good thing I have is Daniel and lately I can't see the good. I can't feel the love as much. I'm so numb. 

I'm not good enough, I'm not smart enough, or pretty enough so lately I find it extremely hard to even try... but I know I have to. 

I need a job, get good grades... keep my room clean but I can't bring myself to it. 

I feel like keeping my friends is too much effort and not even worth it. I feel like they don't even really care about  me.... I just want life to get better.... I want to be cared about.