Chapter 1: With Hope in Pure Darkness

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic

Reads: 537
Comments: 11

~~This is just basically an intro to the story.  I think this is going to turn out really well.  At least I hope so.  I am really really excited to write this, and I really hope you guys enjoy it too!  :)  Thank you for being the wonderful fans you are!  I'm sorry for it being short.  It's only short because it is an intro, and I was hoping I would catch your guys attention.  Criticism is always welcome.  Thanks again everyone :)~~

I sat there quietly hugging my knees to my chest.  Thirteen years old, and I was still here.  I could hear the footsteps walking around the small house.  
It was only one story, but it was enclosed by trees so no one could hear, and we didn’t have neighbors that lived close to us.  It was only my dad and I because my mom had left when I was just a baby.  
The footsteps were loud, and I couldn’t tell where they were going.  I prayed that they wouldn’t come to my room.  At least if you could call it a room.  
I had grown to like having my own little space even though it was beyond small.  I can stand without hitting my head, but I can not lay down unless I am curled into a ball.  I do have a tiny bathroom attached though.  It had a toilet and a sink, so I could do my business, get a sponge bath, and wash my hair in the sink.  The only bad thing was I didn’t have the privilege of hot water.  I did have the privilege of having a shelf where I could put some of my clothes and my school things on.  That, I was thankful for.
Thump, thump, thump.  
I heard the steps getting closer.  Maybe he was just going to watch T.V.  He might forget me tonight.  The steps got closer until I could see his shadow underneath my door.  I held my breath and sat there very still.  I didn’t want to make any noise to attract his attention.  Slowly though, his shadow faded and the footsteps weren’t so loud anymore.  I heard the click of the remote button as he turned it on.  I instantly breathed a sigh of relief, and hoped that the T.V. would keep him preoccupied for some time.  
“Another child was taken out of an unfit home last night when a seven year old girl made a frantic 911 call.  Her abusive father had left her alone just long enough for her to make the phone call, and give her address.  Listen to this brave, young girl’s story next, and stay tuned as we interview her at seven pm tonight.”  I really wished that could have been me, but I was happy for the little girl.  One less abused child was a very large miracle.  
“Stupid girl deserved it.  Kids don’t know how to behave these days.”  I heard my father say in an angry tone as he clicked off the T.V.  The couch groaned in its own note of thanks as my father stood up.  
“Oh please, please leave me alone tonight.” I said to myself.  I felt the tears start to build in my eyes, and then overflow as his footsteps got closer.  
“Emily, you know how to behave don’t you?”  He spoke in a firm voice, and kept walking closer to the door.  Too soon, I could see the shadow of his feet outside the door.  
“Yes sir.”  I spoke in a soft voice so he wouldn’t think I was raising my voice at him.  I despised the word sir so much.  Sir was used in a respect to someone, and my father did not deserve any respect from anyone.  Especially not me, but if I wanted to go without bruises tonight, I would have to talk the way he wanted me to.  
I heard the click of the lock on my door, and I quickly stood, wiping the tears from my eyes.  I would not show him my fear tonight.  Tonight, I would stand up and not give in to the terror that enclosed my heart every time it beat.  
Just as I got myself together, the door opened.  I was ready.

Submitted: June 27, 2010

© Copyright 2020 DearDiaryWriter. All rights reserved.


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Add Your Comments:



Nice intro. Just continue writing I know that there are people out there who wants to read your stories?

Sun, June 27th, 2010 10:28pm


Ok Thank you :)

Sun, June 27th, 2010 4:03pm


Even if no one were to comment, you should continue writing. I write things for myself all the time. It just makes you a better writer.

It's an intriguing start. I'll be waiting for the next chapter. :D (Update me please!)

Sun, June 27th, 2010 11:03pm


Oh I know. I would have continued to write it in my own time, but I wouldn't have posted until later when I would get it revised enough. This is kind of a rough start. Personally when I read this over I see so many things wrong with it, like to me it doesn't flow very well. So I wasn't sure if you would like it. But I am really glad that you do :) Thanks so much! I will definitely update you :)

Sun, June 27th, 2010 4:08pm


Ok, just to sort this out, since I'm always confusing lol. Most likely from lack of sleep. It's 2:14 am right now... I was too excited to sleep haha. Even if I didn't get comments I would have still wrote this, and maybe even still posted it and everything. But I wasn't sure if you guys would enjoy this that much, because to me it is really rough. Lol. I'm going to try and revise better next chapter. Thanks you guys! And by the way since you guys are amazing fans I am going to continue to post it on here. :) I am sooo excited! (and also, I could never EVER stop writing. I would DIE. lol! But seriously. Writing is a big part of my life, and it gets me through life. Writing is basically how I handle everything that is thrown at me, and I hope you guys understand that every time I read another comment I smile because you guys seriously MAKE MY DAY! I love you :) Thanks again!

Sun, June 27th, 2010 11:16pm


(: I like it a lot so far. Please continue,

Mon, June 28th, 2010 6:07am


I will. Thank you :)

Mon, June 28th, 2010 12:21am

sweet angel

LOVE IT! update me?

Mon, June 28th, 2010 7:49am


I definitely will! Thank you soooo much :) I'm really glad that you like it!

Mon, June 28th, 2010 1:00am


Well I like it^^ Please continue

Mon, June 28th, 2010 5:47pm


I definitely will. I will be posting tomorrow. Sorry, today was kind of a hectic day! I'll make up for it though! Thanks for commenting! :)

Mon, June 28th, 2010 12:46pm


I think it's off to a good start and I will apreciate it if you would tell me when you update

Tue, June 29th, 2010 4:49pm


I definitely will tell you! :) And thank you. I am working really hard on the next chapter so it is pretty good when I post it. I really want everyone to enjoy this novel. :) Thank you for taking the time to comment. It really means a lot to me! :)

Tue, June 29th, 2010 9:52am


a great intro! this is what i ment whn i said i wanted to imagine it! i like hearing the narrators thots and what shes feeling as the moment happens rather than how she tells it later. let me no when its updated plz! and if ur willing i hope you can read my story as well. i have 2 chaptrs up bt sinc ther havin troubl with postin, u can only read chptr 1. :\ if u want to try ur luck at getting to chaptr two tho, click the contents link at the top of the page in the box my summary is in. mayb ur comp will like u more than it likes me. lol! cant wait to read more of your stuff!

Thu, July 1st, 2010 6:58pm


Thanks :) I thought you would like this novel better than the diary. I am also having trouble posting because I've had chapter 2 written for a while now, but it is not loading when I try to save it (like when it would go to would you like to publish?) I'd never get to that page, it just comes up blank. I will update you though :) And I will also check out your novel! Thanks again!

Fri, July 2nd, 2010 12:44am

Tyler Gohde

This is pretty good. A couple grammatical slip-ups, and at a couple points it seems like you go from present- to past-tense, and then back. But this is still good. I think it has potential to become a great story. Congrats.

Mon, July 5th, 2010 8:26pm


Thank you :) And I know... I'm not the best with grammar so I just kind of get confused and put what sounds right to me down. Sorry about that. Thanks for reading! :)

Mon, July 5th, 2010 1:48pm


I like it! it could use some more detail, but other than that, it's great! :D

Tue, July 6th, 2010 8:18am


Thank you :)

Tue, July 6th, 2010 9:05am


you set the mood really stomach dropped a few times....i want more!! :D ...please update me

Wed, July 7th, 2010 9:56am


I will! Thank you soooo much :)

Wed, July 7th, 2010 10:35pm

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