Chapter 1: Welcome to Hell
It was a joyous looking, bright sunny day when tragedy struck me. Tears fell our of my jaded colored eyes until someone sat down on the bench at the park next to me. Long violet hair made its way to my face as soon as a breeze passed by. A red ribbon placed on her hair was tied into a bow. Her syrupy colored eyes stared deeply into mine after I looked up at her. Elizabeth came to see what was the matter with me today. She wasn't the nicest person in the world, but definitely not the worst either.
"Now what are you crying about?" she asked, annoyed. "I'm tired of having to come check up on you every time you start whining about something so small and stupid."
"Then don't come," I replied through sobs. "We both know that you don't want to see me and that you hate me."
"I never said that."
"But it's true, isn't it?"
"No," she answered quietly, getting up and walking away in the direction towards home. My pain, my hell. Elizabeth never liked hanging around me at all, so she upped and left a lot as soon as she finished speaking what few words she had to say. Frozen like glass from knowing what pain awaited me there, I only stayed behind.
Night had fallen and I couldn't stay out for a second longer. Being late back home I knew I would be punished and what kind of punishment I would receive from him, my step father.
I took one last step near the hell that awaited me. In front of me stood a tall, middle aged man with coconut colored hair matching his eyes. The color of his eyes reminded me of Elizabeth. Not very much similarities between those two. Just their eye color and taste in food.
"You're late, Jade. Do you know what time it is?" I stayed silent, expecting the answer to come from him. "Well do you!?"
Instead of staying silent another moment longer, I answered him. "Forgive me. I got lost in thought and forgot about the time. Please forgive me." As I said those words, my eyes of jades were directed to the ground. If I were to look into those brown eyes of his, I would feel as if I were choking, unable to breathe.
Very slowly I walked inside the mansion, following Augustus, my stepfather, from behind. On the outside the mansion may have seemed perfect; flawless with its beautiful pure white look and stain free huge glass windows, at least one in each room. There were a variety of flowers planted in the yards, both front and back. Bushes grew with them, all lined up horizontally.
On the inside-- Now that's a different story. On the inside the place still looks flawless. Spotless floors and walls because of the hired daily maid. Expensive jewelry were neatly placed in elegant boxes. Other expensive items hung around, the everyday used kind of items like forks and such.
There were a few flaws that were hidden deeply within. Augustus being the biggest flaw of all. People thought him a decent man. Handsome for a man of his age. Every word he spoke to someone was a word of eloquence. His words were lies, even when he talked to me. He said he loved me more than anything, but a step father wouldn't do that to his step daughter.
I stayed silent until we reached a door of oak brown wood. "Please don't punish me, Augustus. I promise to be a good child. I'll be good from now on and never break another rule again." Tears formed in my eyes, readying themselves to leak.
"You say that all the time, my sweet Jade. Never do you follow the rules. What makes you think I'll believe you again? Jade, you're mine and always will be mine."
The first time I broke a rule, being late for dinner, I was let off easy. Augustus only spoke kind words to me, saying that if I were to be late for dinner again, he wouldn't let me off again. Of course I thought he was trying to be nice-considerate since I was engrossed in reading-but it was only to deceive everyone around us. My step sister; my mother.
Anything I thought of to say, I knew wouldn't help me out of that situation. When it comes to Augustus, once he starts something he has to finish it. He opened the door, waved me inside, and followed me from behind to make sure I wouldn't do anything rash, such as run away from the silky red bed before my eyes. Tears from fear came out like a faucet turned on full blast. A sound of annoyance spilled out of Augustus's mouth as he pushed me with just enough force onto my bed.
“F-Forgive me!” I cried out, too loud for his liking.
“I give you a home, food, clothes, toys. And this is how you repay me? I've been very kind to you, but you take advantage of my kindness and continue breaking all the rules in this house. Your punishment will continue from where we ended last night.”
Right away he leaped into my bed, putting all of his weight on top of me to keep me from escaping that hell. I had to keep reminding myself that it was for my mother's happiness. She was never happy since Dad divorced her for her sister. My aunt Lila was the one my dad loved from day one. Not my mother. The tears that streaked down her cheeks broke my heart as soon as I saw them.
Augustus took off my clothes, but not his own, like always. I had to be the one naked. He would never strip himself. Sometimes he took pictures of my pain and tears. Sometimes he made videos of it. Other times he would make me do things to myself while he watched and laughed. My fear, my despair, was his power over me and I knew that. Even though I knew it, I still couldn't help but give him that power over me. How could I not? When being raped every night with no one noticing anything, I figured nothing could be done. I didn't want to destroy my mother's happiness, so I never told anyone.
How did it come to this? Why did he choose to be with me over my mother, the woman he married? Well...
I saw a man in a dark blue suit wearing a black necktie. He was looking in all sorts of directions as if he was a lost boy looking for his mommy. That day was the last of my normal days. Kindness being one of my flaws, I decided to cross the street, away from my mother's daycare, and ask him if he was lost.
“Sir, are you lost? Maybe I could help you since I know these streets very well and because I grew up here in America.” A gentle smile formed across my face as did his.
“Thank you, kind lady, but I don't think you can help me with this situation. I'm not lost but deeply in love instead. It must be love at first sight because she is the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes upon.”
I directed my eyes to where he was staring and saw my mother. “Ah, so you've fallen for my mother? That's nice. She needs someone to talk to her besides her daughter. She hasn't been the same ever since Dad left us. Mom tries to hide her feelings, but I can tell that she's still upset over the divorce.” I continued as I pushed him across the street: “Go on. Talk to her.”
“A-are you sure?” he stammered.
Little did I know that he wasn't looking at my mother. It was always me and my mother was a pawn to hide it. He knew he couldn't have me with such an age difference, so he took what he could get to be closer to me and he got that and more. I was only fifteen at the time and he was in his late thirties. Augustus didn't want anyone to know about his true intentions. But who would when you're an adult who's attracted to a child?
“Sure, I'm sure.” Another smile escaped. Such a fool I was.
A day later, Augustus invited us for dinner to the hotel he was staying at for awhile. We gladly accepted the kind offer, but after we got there everything changed.
Still in a depressed state and, yet, getting better, my mother had so much alcohol in her system that she couldn't stay awake for long. Augustus put her in the snow white bed he used. My mother's long flowing blonde hair was displaying her beautiful features. Slightly pale skin and a white dress that he bought her showed every perfect feature. If only I could look that beautiful, I thought.
Augustus noticed me looking at my mother and told me to eat the dessert he got for the three of us. It was dessert. How can anyone pass up a chance like that? Sweets were always welcomed in my stomach. All the cupcakes, cookies, pies, and more. Big! A big variety of desserts! Chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, and many other flavors. If only my stomach could take them all, then I would swallow every bit of it, leaving none untouched.
But that wasn't the dessert he was talking about. No, not the kind that you could chew and swallow and let digest in your stomach. Instead, I was the dessert; his dessert. Casually he walked up to me and placed one arm around me. He took a few strands of my hair and sniffed it as if it smelled like flowers or something. Then, out of nowhere, he presented pink roses to me. How did he do that? I thought.
He laughed, seeing the astonishment on my face. “I only took them from the vase sitting in the center of the table. Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl such as you.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“Please, call me Augustus now. Dad's fine, too, of course. Whichever you're more comfortable with. No need for formalities. We're a family now.”
“Ah, right... Thank you... Augustus.”
As if being taken over by the devil himself, Augustus suddenly turned into a demon. He pushed me down on the floor, hurting my head a little. Then a smirk crossed his face, full of malice. My pink dress was ripped and pieces of It were scattered about the floor when I looked down. How could he have done that so fast that I didn't notice it? The question couldn't be answered.
“My love,” he said as if in total belief that it was mutual love. Not unrequited on his part. “Jade, you have always been the one for me, the one I love most in this world. Not her. Not your mother.”
“Augustus, please stop joking! This isn't funny!” Tears made their way out of my emerald-colored eyes and down my cheeks.
“Joking? Who said this was a joke? I love you! Not her!”
“Don't!” I cried when he pulled down my underwear. “I'll tell my mother! Please! Stop it! Please!”
Knowing my weakness-probably from watching me all the time-he said, “Do you want to ruin your mother's happiness? Ever since I came along she's been smiling as if no other man is for her.”
I didn't reply. All I could do was let him take me and he did. With no regret, no guilt, he invited himself inside of me. My mother's happiness has always been the most important to me. But that man made everything change in that moment. The whole world seemed to leave me behind with just him as if no one cared about me; as if no one wanted to save me from his clutches.
Usually a woman would be happy to marry a man of such high power. I didn't care about power or anything like that. I just wanted to marry my boyfriend out of love. But, because of Augustus, our love drifted apart. Augustus made sure to keep me away from him since “I belong to him.” Being trapped and hidden behind walls, separated from society, my boyfriend thought I was getting bored of him and left me for another.
I tried to tell him, but the words refused to come out. There was no one I could talk to about it. Not my mother, my boyfriend... No one was there to help me. Augustus had all the power and everything one could wish for. Still, that wasn't enough for him. Until he had me he would feel as if he had nothing. Being handsome and rich and powerful, he could have any woman he wanted-all of the women even-but he chose only me and used my mother as a pawn.
I still can't figure out why he chose me over all the women in the world. Me, a teenage girl.
“I'm sorry. I'm sorry,” I stuttered through the tears. “I have a boyfriend. Please let me go. My boyfriend... My boyfriend is waiting for me at the diner. I have to go see him.”
“What time were you supposed to meet at the diner?” he asked as if he knew he already won the battle before it even started.
“Eight o' clock,” I answered honestly.
“How long would he wait for you? Surely not for two hours in this kind of weather.”
Looking outside one of the few windows, I noticed it was pouring. He was right. My boyfriend wouldn't have been able to stay up that long, since he had work at four in the morning, and wait for me in such weather. Looked as if the whole earth would soon be drenched in water and everyone would drown in it. Everyone would be cleansed with filth, although I already was as soon as I met Augustus for dinner.
It was the first time for me, and it hurt like hell. He gagged my mouth with an unused napkin lying flat on the table that was in reach. The thought of being his dessert every night poured fear into my heart. My love of people started to disappear. Only my love for my mother was there. No one else mattered. Hatred started to grow in me along with the fear. Never have I felt such emotions.
Augustus changed not only my life, but myself as well. Everything started to shatter to pieces like my dress. The rainstorm seemed never ending. Life looked dead. I wanted to be what life looked like to me while in that situation. I wanted to be dead. He wouldn't let me. He made sure of it. Augustus would stop me to the ends of the earth. Sometimes we'd both lose sleep. If he'd stopped raping me, then we could have probably been a happy family on the inside as well as on the outside.
All these thoughts... and none to help me decrease my hatred and need for vengeance. I needed it, but I knew it was impossible for me to do anything about it. How could I kill the man my mother loved; the man that makes her smile out of happiness everyday? There was no way out. Not with the power he had.
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