“We aren’t going to make it!” I screamed as I accidently punched Jennifer on the arm making the car swerve around.
“Dammit Natalie you need to stop!” Jennifer screamed at me.
“You need to hurry up!” I screamed as I looked at my watch noticing that we had less than forty-five minutes for the wedding and we were still an hour away.
“Fine hold on.” Jennifer said as she sped up. It wasn’t like till five minutes later that a cop stopped us.
“Fuck!” I screamed as I began to hit the car as the cop got out. I was still hitting the car when I saw the policeman outside the window. Jennifer just smiled at the officer and gave him her license.
“Ma'am, is your friend okay?”
“Yes well you see we’re trying to stop a wedding and we have less than forty minutes but sadly we are wasting time right now.”
“Look miss I understand that you…” I heard the cop begin to say before I lost my patience and got out the car.
“Look buddy I don’t have time for this! I can’t let her get married so how about you let me go before…before I hurt you.”
“Um ma’am I’m going to ask you nicely to calm down and get back in the car.”
“Calm down, how the hell do you want me to calm down!” I said as I began to walk to the policeman intending to slap him but instead Jennifer ended up slapping me real good. I stood there amazed at her actions.
“Natalie for fucks sake calm the fuck down.”
“Oh my… I’m terribly sorry sir I just… I just can’t lose her you have to understand I can’t lose her.” I said as I began to sob.
“Please you have to let us go.”
“I can’t so that?”
“I can’t let you go…you won’t get there in time.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I was in love once ma’am and I let him go…I didn’t go after him and I lost him because of it. I can see there’s a fight in you and I know that you won’t give up so how about you two ladies get in the squad car and prepare for a ride that y’all will never forget.”
“Thank you!” I screamed as I hugged him and got in the car. Jennifer just smiled at the man and they both came and got in the car. Jennifer gave him the address and we began to drive… no wait we raced against the speed of time. At some point I looked over at him and noticed that he looked like a young version of Santa. He had a beard and longish hair as well as a bit of a belly. I didn’t know who he really was but I was thankful for him.
We finally got there after speeding and almost crashing, but we got there just in time. I thanked Nicholas, isn’t that funny Nicholas...Saint Nick, and he thanked me too before driving away while Jennifer and I barged in. I basically flew up the stairs until I found the chapel and just as I burst in I hit something and ended up on top of it.
Honestly I thought I had hit a brick wall or something but as I looked down I saw a very bulky man. I stood up and looked around, I saw Nicolai but I didn’t see her…Max was gone.
She never called… she never looked back; I had lost her so I had no point in living. I waited and waited for a single word from her but she never took time for it. Each day I went and asked Nicolai but always it was the same answer. I began to get lost in drugs and alcohol. I would wake up in strange places alone and lost.
Then I heard the news… she was getting married. I didn’t know what to do, so I did the only logical thing…I got even more lost. The day of her wedding I had planned in visiting but I didn’t I made my own wedding. I went to a bar and asked someone to marry me, ha I didn’t care who I just wanted someone to make me… ugh I didn’t know what I wanted.
It didn’t matter though I found someone and I planned on marrying her. Nicolai was there, he was going to be the witness but Jennifer had gone off to be with Natalie. Yes Natalie the one who had stolen my heart now had my sister’s support. Did it matter that I helped Jennifer get on her feet; nay she left to be with her.
I was ready you know, I was ready to say yes but Nicolai stopped me.
“You can not marry this person angel.”
“And why not?”
“She does not mean anything to you.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“But it does angel.”
“What do you want Nicolai, she left me!”
“But she didn’t.” Nicolai whispered so silently that I could barely hear him.
“What?” I asked as I walked towards him.
“She didn’t forget about you angel.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I lied.” Nicolai said as he looked down.
“I wanted to protect you from her, she had hurt you badly and I hurt seeing you that way so I thought it be best if you two separated… forever.”
“I only wanted the best for you.”
“The best! You enjoyed seeing me suffer night by night, you enjoyed seeing me become lonely and afraid, is that what you thought was best?!” I screamed at Nicolai confused and feeling like I had been cheated
“No I expected you to move on, to be happy with someone else who was sure about being gay.”
“Nicolai I trusted you.”
“I know and you still can.”
“How the hell am I going to do that when just now you prove to me that you destroyed my happiness?”
“You are young angel, you have…”
“No! Do not tell me that I have no idea what love is because I do! What I feel for her is what you felt for my mother!” I screamed and saw the surprise in his eyes.
“I knew since that day you told me Nicolai, the pieces came together, you were always there, watching, but you were always sad and lonely. I could see the look in your eyes, you wanted my mother but she loved my father and you never stopped loving her. Even now after having have died you still cannot let go. Nicolai that is love, that is how I feel.”
“I don’t… I wanted to protect you angel, never did I plan to cause you pain. I told your mother I would keep you safe but you are right I hurt you even more, I ruined your happiness.”
“I cannot say that I am happy and that I forgive you Nicolai but I love you for trying… I can’t be here. I know it is too late, she’s…she’s married by now and I can’t…won’t mess with her love life. I cannot be here Nicolai I must go.”
“I was wrong angel, I too will be gone but I will always be there when you need me…I know that you will not forgive me easily but I… I… I love you too angel.” Nicolai said as I saw his tears. I have never seen him cry not even in my mother’s grave. I gave him a hug but I couldn’t say anything else, I apologized to the woman and her friend before leaving.
“Nicolai where is she?” Jennifer asked as she ran to him. I just ran up too him and before he could respond I punches him.
“I know I deserve that and much more Natalie but please hear me.”
“Natalie shut the hell up and let him talk.”
“Nicolai did she marry?”
“No she didn’t.”
“Where is she?”
“I don’t know she said she needed to go.”
“She didn’t say.”
“Why didn’t she marry?” I finally asked after having calmed down.
“I told her the truth about what I did.”
“I saw that I had done wrong and I couldn’t let her marry.”
“I hate you Nicolai but I thank you for being honest in the end.” I finally said.
“Don’t worry angel many people hate me at the moment.”
“Nicolai you really don’t know where she is?” I asked anxious about where she could have gone too.
“I do.” Jennifer said. Nicolai and me turned around to look at her and found that she had a horrifying look on her face.
“No, we have to go now.”
“You don’t understand Natalie, I know where Max is.”
“Where the hell is she then?”
“My parent’s grave.” Jennifer said and I saw as Nicolai’s face turned white and he looked sick.”
“What’s wrong with her being there?”
“Max said she would never return to their grave until she herself was ready to join them.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Natalie, Max plans on killing herself.” Jennifer said and it all dawned on me. I looked at Jennifer and we ran. We got in a taxi just as someone was getting out. I really didn’t know how much we paid but the taxi driver stepped on it all right and again we were racing on the streets. I really didn’t want to lose Max like this, I always knew there was a reason I hated Romeo and Juliet as well as Twilight, suicidal endings and attempts were so cliché, I thought as I prayed that she wouldn’t end like Romeo. I really loved Maxine Thompson and I couldn’t let her leave me without knowing that I chose her, that I love her, I couldn’t let her leave me again.
© Copyright 2016 dlaura69. All rights reserved.
Poem / Poetry
Poem / Poetry
Poem / Poetry
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