“Can you drive any faster?” Jennifer asked as she laughed about something her friends said. I just ignored her and put some music on.
“So Max why are you gay?”
“Because I like to be.” I said.
“Why would you ruin Natalie’s life like that?”
“Look not to be mean but Natalie was already like this and how about you three little bitches shut the hell up.” I said through gritted teeth.
“You don’t really know, Natalie dated guys before you.”
“Yea and from what I’ve heard she dated girls too.”
“Oh did you hear about James and her?” One of the friends said to the other.
“Oh yea I heard that he took her virginity in the back of a car, he said she looked so pathetic and cried a lot.”
“Oh poor girl that’s probably why she…” Jennifer began to say when I suddenly came to a stop making them fall against the seat. I took the keys out and got out the truck and began to walk to the house. We weren’t really that far just like thirty minutes which walking would be one hour. However lucky for me the day Robert gave me the horse I trained him a little bit. After whistling to the song Moments by Emerson Drive my horse kept on walking to me, so I trained him into coming when he heard the whistle and well for now I whistled.
“What the hell are you doing?” My sister screamed at me as she and her friends walked towards me. Once every one of them was out I locked the truck.
“I’m tired of you and your friends. I don’t understand why y’all have to be talking shit, Jennifer you used to be nice and supporting of me and loved me. You understood the difficulty I had in accepting myself. You saw the pain I went through the times I hurt because of my shame and now you stand here insulting me knowing how that hurts me.”
“Well if you were normal then I wouldn’t be the way I am!”
“So now it’s my fault that you no longer accept me for who I am?”
“Yes you’re gay and that’s not good.”
“Yea well you’re my sister and I thought that you loved me but clearly I was wrong.”
“I do love you I just…”
“Save it Jennifer I don’t want to hear anymore. Just don’t worry about it anymore, I’ll talk to the lady and ask for a change of location.” I said as I saw my horse coming, I climbed on and rode off. They could walk all the way home and think about who they were.
“Hey Robert.” I called out as I walked in.
“Hey baby girl, how was your day?”
“Ehh, it was okay.”
“Well you know I got the tattoo and then Natalie kissed me.” I said as I blushed when he looked at me with his mouth open and his hip out.
“Omg how was it?”
“It was amazing.” I said knowing that I had a dreamy voice and a lost look.
“So do you have a date?”
“Yea but at her house with her parents and ex girlfriend.”
“Yea her mom saw the ex and invited her over Friday planning to hook them up again but now she knows that Natalie and I are going out as girlfriends and well she invited me to join them.”
“I totally wish I could be there to see the face on all of your faces.”
“Yea it’s going to be very awkward.”’
“Yea and Jennifer and her friend’s started taking about Natalie and you know, why was she gay and then they tried to talk bad about her and me so I stopped the truck and got out. When they all came out I locked the truck and then rode off with the horse.”
“So Jennifer is still acting bad?”
“Yea, but there’s not much I can do now.”
“I’m sorry, and haven’t you named your horse?”
“No not really.”
“You should pick a name.”
“How about Black Storm?”
“Why would you name him that?”
“What you mean?”
“I mean is there a reason for that name?”
“Yea he’s black and quick like lightning and can be pretty wild when he is upset.”
“Okay so Black Storm is a good name then.”
“Yea.” I said.
“So when are the girls getting here?”
“I don’t know probably in forty five minutes.”
“Ha-ha damn don’t you feel sorry.”
“Yea I do but I’m not going back for them.” I said as I stood up and went to get a water bottle.
“You want to eat, I made hot wings?”
“Yea totally.” I said as I hot a plate and served myself, I waited for Robert to get his plate and food before starting to eat.
“This is really good and spicy.” I said as I drank all my water before getting another one.
“Yea, you want to know what really helps though?” Robert asked as he took deep breaths.
“You have any?”
“Ha-ha no.” Robert said as he drank his water. We had just finished cleaning when the girls finally arrived and the girls looked pissed.
“Hey girls you…” Robert began to say but Jennifer cut him off.
“Max I need to talk to you.” Jennifer said as she took a hold of my hand and pulled me to the living room.
“What the fuck were you thinking?”
“You heard me, what was that you leaving us behind?”
“That was me, being tired of you.”
“Yea well I get tired of you too but you don’t see me abandoning you.”
“That’s where you are wrong Jennifer you already abandoned me, but not only did you abandoned me you left me with a broken heart. You made me feel so fucked up that I went and just about drowned myself and I didn’t even give a shit, why because the only family I had had shunned me. You were all I cared for and you have been neglecting me. You have been making me feel so bad that I have gotten to the point of wanting to die. If it wasn’t for Robert and Natalie I probably would have taken my life by now!”
“Well it’s not like I’m holding a knife to your veins or a gun to your brain. Don’t blame me for how messed up you are in the brain. Its not like I haven’t tried to tell you that what you are doing is wrong. I‘ve tried to help you out but all you keep doing is refusing to love me, to support me like you used to do. I remember when you used to care for me and not judge me!”
“Yea well you used to not judge me too but now with your stupid friends you…”
“They are not stupid they have helped me see the truth.”
“Well the truth they have been teaching you is jacked up because you aren’t the sweet open minded girl I knew. You aren’t the sister who came to me when our parents were dead and our uncle didn’t give a shit and helped me see that I wasn’t going to hell. You aren’t that sister that helped me when she found me lying on the floor with my wrists bleeding. You aren’t the sister who helped me and never judged me. If you want to blame me for being more mean blame yourself. If you hadn’t changed so drastically then maybe I wouldn’t have changed and we could be the same twins who always had each other’s back!” I screamed noticing that tears were rushing form my eyes as well from Jennifer’s.
“You keep blaming everything on me but it isn’t just my fault you could be normal.”
“You know what Jennifer I don’t even want to continue this fight I told you I’m leaving okay, just give me a few more days and I’m out of your life.” I said as I turned around and began to walk away.
“You keep making me the bad guy, so how about I show you how bad I really am.” I heard Jennifer say before I felt a sharp pain on my back.
I don’t really remember much but I do remember how I slowly fell on my knees and then on my face. It was all so slow, I saw the carpet meeting me halfway, at least that’s how it seemed. I saw blood dropping one by one on the ground almost as if the were splashing like tears. For all I know I could have been crying blood from all the pain I felt inside. I didn’t really know what happened then because all I could see is feet running to me I didn’t know what was happening my vision got blurry. Maybe they were going to hurt me even more; maybe they were going to help, I really didn’t know. All I knew was that my vision turned dark and all I could hear was the pounding of my heart before that too disappeared.
© Copyright 2016 dlaura69. All rights reserved.
Poem / Poetry
Poem / Poetry
Poem / Poetry
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