Chapter 2:

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Science Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

Reads: 106

Alfonso Demmel was upset, because he knew his God would punish him for all that he had done, all the people he had hurt. He did not pretend that everyone had survived his explosions and attacks. He was insane, and he knew it, and he did not pretend that he had let his God down by allowing himself to go insane. He did, however, pretend that he had had a happy childhood.

His mother, Lorena Demmel, had dreamed of being a school-teacher ever since she was a little girl. She loved taking care of children, which made sense, considering she had treated her own children so poorly. She had favored her first son, Junky Demmel, because he had the uncanny talent of being her first son. He had remained her favorite until his death at the hands of pneumonia, and by then she had focused her attention on her first daughter, Tricia Demmel, which meant that she had never bothered with taking care of Junky's twin brother, Alfonso Demmel. The reason that she did not favor Alfonso despite the fact that he was, and still is, identical to Junky in every way was this: He was not as intellegent as his sister, which wasn't saying much. Albert Einstein himself did not possess her book-smarts. Anyhow, any plans of teaching ended with her marriage, which was probably for the best, considering how poorly she had treated the classroom that was her home. She had been arrested and killed by the government when Alfonso was thirteen.

The reason Alfonso's family had been arrested and killed by the government when he was thirteen was this: They had confided in their neighbor that they were immigrants, and that neighbor had confided in the government that she was living next to immigrants.

His father, Goldblum Demmel, had been promiscuous in a manner that would impress Zeus himself up until his marriage. Like his wife, he had favored his first son over his completely identical second son. He had also replaced his son with a dog after his death, and had directed all his affection towards it. Contrary to Alfonso's beliefs, the dog was not killed by the government, and would in fact outlive Alfonso by three days. Unlike his wife, he still treated Alfonso decently, much like how you would treat a guest if you worked for a hotel. He had always held some sort of conspiracy theory about the nature of the government, because the alternative, that the powers that be were genuinely stupid and incompetent, was too terrifying for him to imagine. His father had been a farmer, and he promised himself that he would avoid becoming a farmer at all costs, even if it meant moving to The State. The first and only job he received when he moved to The State was a strawberry farmer. He had been arrested and killed by the government when Alfonso was thirteen.

The reason Alfonso survived while the rest of his family was arrested and killed by the government when he was thirteen was this: He had seen the police hovering towards his home, and rather than warn his family, he hid in the basement. He knew his God would punish him for this too. After arresting and sending his family to be killed by the government, the police's scanners had detected something in the basement. Acting quickly, Alfonso stripped himself of all his clothes and shouted, in his native tongue, "I am a sex slave."

His sister, Tricia Demmel, had been the laziest human being in all of existence. In her ten years of existence, she had done less work than anyone else who had ever lived and will ever live. The only thing she had done in her life was building a wheelchair that ran on her own excrement. She never had to do anything for herself, because her mother had never said "no" to her. In fact, she had only heard the word "no" once: When she had said "I don't want to be arrested and killed by the government".She had been arrested and killed by the government when Alfonso was thirteen.

It should be noted that this book has been written lousily on purpose, and is not in any way, shape, or form a reflection on my writing ability, or lack thereof.

Alfonso had then gone through what he pretended was the best year of his life. He was adopted by the government and made to work various manual labor jobs for no pay, until one day he reported sick. After extensive testing, his doctor had found out the problem: There was a cancerous growth in his stomach that would kill him at any second. This growth will not be the cause of Alfonso's death at the end of this story. These news led Alfonso to attempt to end his own life. Obviously, he had failed, but after many years and many attempts, his wish would finally come true, at the end of this story.

Alfonso sat on the roof ofPrecious Slut, which was a plastic surgery clinic, waiting for midnight, where he would not be seen or heard until it was too late. He thought of the charges he had rigged in the basement of the clinic, the nitroglycerine. He thought of all the people inside. Doctors helping people who were truly sick. Patients who desperately needed to be taken care of, unlike Alfonso and his pet cancerous growth.


The Smiley-Faced Bomber climbed down the fire escape of the clinic and went into the nearest building. He contemplated his appearance. He was much too thin and much too tall and much too pale. His suit was much too cheap and much too brown and much too brown. He was now at the top of the building and could the clinic perfectly. He contemplated his mask, his face. It was yellow and surrounded his entire face. The only part of the mask that was not yellow was the big gleaming smile in the lower portion of the front. He pressed the button that detonated the charges. He contemplated his diet, which was made up entirely of water, caffeine, barbiturates, stimulants, depressants, and window washer. He was not the only one who saw or heard the explosion, but he was the only who was high enough to see the message that his bombs had spelled out. His message to the world was this:


Dominic Dorshimer had had trouble sleeping for the past year. He had taken to staying up late at night finishing all his work, and had in fact asked for a bigger work load so that he could have something to do with his time. He had also taken to walking around his house as though he had never been there before. One night, he found Alfonso's bag, which contained all of his important things. In public, Dominic was never the sort of person who would go through someone's personal belongings. In private, he was always the sort of person who would. He had found water, caffeine, barbiturates, stimulants, depressants, and window washer, none of which interested him. The item that had interested him was a pack of cigarettes. He knew that cigarettes had been made illegal and could only be imported from The South, so naturally he assumed that Alfonso was some kind of black market merchant. He decided to try one of the cigarettes, but had failed miserably for the first three tries because he kept putting the orange end out and did not realize that he needed to light the cigarette on fire.

On the fourth try, he finally got it to work and decided that he would go to work smoking to see the reactions of his co-workers.

Submitted: April 24, 2012

© Copyright 2022 Durden Pitt. All rights reserved.


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