My name is Jessica Grace, Jesse for short and I promised myself long ago never to fall for a guy, never to give into his plays no matter how well he acted them out. I knew how guys were, but once I got a little older and a little more mature I couldn’t help myself, I played my part well of course, as well as I could without revealing my true self, my betrayal of feelings. I acted like one of the guys to keep them close yet at arm’s length. Never crossing over that line, you know the one I am talking about, right? That line that splits two sides of the relationship on one side you stay friends never going past second base and on the other side everything happens. The side most girls would love to be on and of course all guys dreamt about being on. Except for me I never thought about crossing that line… Until one night it hit me and my dreams were overrun with what I believed I could avoid forever.
My reasons were just, I knew what happened when you feel in love, I admit to a fault that you may be happy at first, but after time passes you just fall and you keep on falling. I’ve seen enough of it to have it stay with me, alright… I mean it’s everywhere; there is really little else to see. Don’t get me wrong I know people stay in love but in my opinion it’s mostly an act, people wanting to be in love needing it to survive. They just act their parts well enough to get by, letting people see what they want them to see, and after a while of course they fall for the lies them self and then what? You live the rest of your life in a state of mind that you believe there is nothing better than what you have now? Like how in this world would it ever be better? I can see it in their souls, it shows faintly on anyone’s face and I…I just don’t want to be another one of those people that just fall for the lies of it all, if I had the choice I would choose differently for everyone else, I would force myself to be able to see what is real and what is a lie, I would choose to know the truth between a real love and a dream one… Nevertheless, how is it that I will truly know what the differences are to start with…? How would I know if the truth is not a lie, or the lie not really the truth? This I believe is one of the real reasons for believing that I was fine living my life as I guess some would call me… a loner, though it does seem a little like a letdown label when I think about it, which I tend to overdo at the best of times… I will think of course of a better term to describe my life after I tell you some of my story, “The View I have about Love”, or something to that nature.
© Copyright 2017 EganP. All rights reserved.
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