The next couple weeks I just caught up with my parents and went to the doctor that Dr. Blake suggested to see. I got another ultrasound and put it in my book. Mom cooed over the book as she went through the pages smiling at them. I caught up on the sleep I’ve missed since I’ve missed out on since I’ve become pregnant. My bed is just so comfortable. The doctor is saying that I’m going to be having the baby early as my iron is getting worse and worse. My little girl is even developing faster so I’ll be able to have her ready to pop out next month. I’ve been sleeping more as I’ve been feeling weaker. My mom had even taken off to take care of me as the doctor said I shouldn’t really be left alone. I’m having more fainting spells which is making the doctor very nervous. “Morning Sweetheart.” My mom smiled as I came down the stairs pulling my hair into a ponytail.
“Morning.” I smiled as I sat down.
“You look pale. Did you take your pill?” I nodded taking a sip from my tea she handed me.
“We need to go shopping for things for the baby.” I yawned. My mom picked up her purse. “She’ll be here in a week. I need to be ready. I’ll have to look at houses and-” Mom cut me off with a look.
“You shut up. Right now let’s just worry about getting this little girl here. You both are welcome to stay here as long as you need. This is my first grandbaby and I want to spoil her.” I smiled as we went to leave. It’s getting really cold here now as it’s winter. I pulled my hoodie closer to me as I shivered.
“I do have to look for a house though, I can’t live with you forever Mom.” I said pulling on my seatbelt as she started the car.
“Shush. You are not well. Until then you aren’t leaving till I know you are better.” I sighed I knew I’m sick, I have to take a nap like a baby during the day or I faint. The first time it happened I scared the crap out of my Dad and he called 911. I woke up in the hospital with everyone around me. Scared me too.
“You’re going to be there, right?” She looked at me. “When I have her. You’ll hold my hand right? So I’m not alone.” She smiled patting my hand.
“Of course I’ll be there for you sweetheart. Both me and your father will be there.” I smiled out the window as we pulled up to the local Target. I’m trying to save money and hell I love to shop at Target. They just have the cutest things. We were able to get the main things for right now, it was a collection of things that I had to get. We were going to have to come back as I couldn’t shop anymore. I was falling around as I am exhausted. I barely made it up stairs before falling asleep. I felt bad for leaving Mom to take everything in from what we bought. But I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore…….
I woke up to the feel of someone pulling the blanket over me. My eyes opened as I felt someone stroking my hair. I couldn’t see much as it’s dark out now and the lights are off but those copper eyes shined through the darkness. “Kellan?” I asked rubbing my eyes sitting up.
“Hey.” He whispered tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.
“What are you doing here?” I asked putting my hand over my mouth. “What happened to your face?” I asked putting my hand gently on the bruised skin of his cheek.
“Which time?” He asked closing his eyes.
“All of them?” He opened his eyes to look at me.
“Well my sister punched me when she found your letter.” He rubbed his jaw. “Then Will knocked me out about a day before I came here.” He smiled at me rubbing at the crease between my eyebrows. “It’s okay, I deserved it. Then when I knocked on the door before, your Dad gave me a shiner.” He nodded to the ice pack on my nightstand.
“How long have you been here?” I asked rubbing my eyes.
“Not too long, I was just watching you sleep.” I gave him a look. “Not in a creepy way you know. You look like you needed it.” I nodded sitting up putting my hand on my belly.
“I guess you’re right. But why are you here, Kellan?” He sighed.
“I missed you. I fucked up. I fucked up big time. It wasn’t that I just screwed up once; I did it so many times. Let me explain.” I watched as he sighed. “I don’t even know where to start.”
“I guess you should start from the beginning.” I sighed.
“That night I wasn’t even drunk.” My eyebrow shot up as I stared at him. “I didn’t want to get drunk, so I was drinking soda, not beer. I just wanted to be with you, it’s why I was with you the whole time. Your outfit,” he shook his head, “Damn it had me going all night.” He took my hand. “But I didn’t want to see you with anyone. I wanted you all to myself.”
“Why?” I asked him confused.
“Because I was always jealous when I saw you with another guy. I’ve always been jealous. When I was younger I used to think it was just me being a big brother type of thing, till I realized something.” I looked at him.
“Realized what?” I asked him quietly.
“I realized I had such a burning jealously. I realized,” He closed his eyes sighing, “that I was in love with you.” I blinked at him. “I was always there. I just didn’t want you to know. I’d give you more respect than my girlfriends. That really pissed them off. When I slept with them, all I could think of was you.”
“Then...why?” I asked surprised.
“I am a little boy on the inside. I was scared what would happen if I told you. What would you say? What would I say? What if things went bad, how would we act?” He shook his head. “So I didn’t do anything…” He shook his head. “I loved you enough to feel my jealously more than to hurt you.” I heard a knock at my closed door before my mom popped her head in.
“Sorry to interrupt but Lottie, you need to take your pills.” The light from the hallway bathed my room in light. All the blood in Kellan’s face drained.
“What’s wrong? What happened?” He put his hand to my cheek stroking the skin. “You’re so pale. You’re eyes are sunken in. You look so sick.” Mom walked over handing me my pill and a cup of juice.
“Dinner is cooking.” She pulled a blanket out of the closet and put it over my lower body. She kissed my head taking the glass from me and pointing to the water bottle on the nightstand. “Drink it.” I nodded at as she glared at me, pointed, and left the room.
“Should I get you anything?” He asked running his fingers over my face.
“No, I’m fine.” I said sighing picking up my water.
“You better be drinking that water before that baby comes sooner that she already is!” My mom called up the stairs as I took a sip of the water.
“What does she mean? Charlotte?” I sighed.
“I’m sick. The doctor is inducing me next week to have her.” The color still isn’t in his face.
“My iron level, they can’t bring it up. I’m having a bunch of fainting spells and it’s just, not good.” Kellan took my hand in his pressing his lips to it. “The only way to bring it up is to get the baby out. Dr. Holden told me that if I would have stayed home I could have fainted and….” I trailed off.
“And what?” I shook my head as the tears formed in my eyes.
“I wouldn’t wake up.” I felt the bed move as Kellan came and pulled me to him.
“I won’t let that happen.” He whispered kissing my head.
“What changed your mind?” I asked him snuggling into his body.
“After dinner.” He sighed holding me close putting his hand on my bump as our daughter kicked. I never thought I’d think that, our daughter.
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