*My Suicide Note (Hypothetical)*

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic

I HAVE NOT COMMITTED SUICIDE THIS IS A HYPOTHETICAL SUICIDE LETTER SO I AM STILL ALIVE AND WILL KEEP WRIGHTING...I actually shed a tear while writing this...I wrote this when I was in a really dark place and the reason I wrote it is because I didn't know if I was going to have to use it or not...sad I know...THX GOTHIKAH666 T_T



I'm sorry but if your reading this you've clearly found me...sorry about the mess, just another thing I fucked up during my life...but thats clearly over now. Please don't mourn over my pathetic death I just couldn't do it anymore. To my dads girlfriend also known as my "stepmom" I want you to know your a sadistic bitch and it should be you with a bullet through your head NOT ME...I HATE YOU and I forever will. So what I'm trying to say is its partially your fault...you've made my life a living hell and I hope you cant live with yourself after this. I've written so many poems on suicide and my unhappiness you should read sometime just go on Booksie.com...I probably didn't log out so you can check them out. Wow...I cant believe I actually did it...well if there is even a heaven I hope "GOD" can accept me for what I've done...HA! Who am I kidding I'm probably sitting next to Satan as we speak...I'll tell him hi for you. Again I apologize for the inconvenience of having to deal with my carcass...I wonder if I look any better with my head blown off. Oh by the way I would also like to blame some of this on the cruel world and sick society we live in...all you people who have treated me like shit, all of you who have outcasted me, I hope your happy that I'm gone because I sure the hell am...but in all honesty you can just fuck off. I don't want people freaking out about my death...you probably wouldn't anyway...I was a nobody...if you passed me on the street you probably wouldn't even notice me...but then you look at the Earth and see these selfish, crude, unapologetic, apathetic scums of humans walk the streets and I wonder where they get there sense of entitlement...those people judge life and don't deserve it...they are not worthy of walking, but yet they do. They say "GOD" sees us equal...but to me it seems like he is picking favorites. I cant blame this all on other people, I hated myself...I couldn't look at myself in a mirror yet alone sleep at night. I stopped caring long ago okay? Which all lead to the aftermath of the 9 mil to my head...I got it from my dad, he says it was my grandpa's gun...my grandpa is dead now, but he was a great man and soldier and he practically raised me...but hes dead...so is my grandma...my aunt...my stepdad...and other people I don't need to mention...and now apparently me. As you may see I've left some of my things on my bed...distribute them to my family accordingly please I'd greatly appreciate it...and tell my family and whatever friends I have that I'm sorry and that I love them...and if you get the chance, tell my "stepmom" to just go fuck herself and she cant come to the funeral...and if your a girl reading this could you slap the shit out of her, really hard, thanks...Okay my dad just left for work so I'm going to go get the 9...See you up there grandpa,grandma,aunt,etc...and I will see you soon...hopefully...I'm so sorry...bye I love you alt


Submitted: May 01, 2011

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Add Your Comments:


Kurlz Basheld

Oh gosh, that was so sad! I seriously am tearing up... :,(

Sun, May 1st, 2011 4:46am


Good or bad?

Sun, May 1st, 2011 2:42pm

Jenna Masonn

This has all crossed my mind. The world is fucked up. That's not changing. I saw one of the tags was "emo"

I hate that word so much. Please don't use it.

Sun, May 1st, 2011 4:52am


My bad sorry...and yeah the world is fucked up...Welcome Aboard

Sun, May 1st, 2011 2:49pm


oh my gosh.....im in tears... no one deserves to go through stuff like that

Sun, May 1st, 2011 7:28am


But thats just it I am "no one" ...so Good or Bad

Sun, May 1st, 2011 2:48pm


it's sad :(

Sun, May 1st, 2011 10:11am


I know...Good or Bad?

Sun, May 1st, 2011 2:46pm

Nocturnal Writer

WOW, this is deep. you have amazing talent.

Sun, May 1st, 2011 9:39pm


Yeah it was hard...writing a suicide note when your not going to kill yourself is difficult...you kind of have to get into a mindset of this is the end Im really going to do it, and literally pour your heart out into the page...or post in this case...but yeah thank you

Sun, May 1st, 2011 2:44pm

Raining Skittles

This is so sad! Please don't ever commit suicide! You have all Odis here on booksie! And everyone would be sad even if they outcast you, they would realize what they were missing in their lives! Keep writing boy, because you have serious talent!

Mon, August 15th, 2011 2:02pm


Thank you...I appreciate it alot

Wed, August 17th, 2011 1:48am

The moon & stars

First off Gideon you sound like an arrogant bastard. Shut up. Second this note both made me cry and and laugh. Laugh because of the whole stepmom thing. Cry well obviously this isn't supposed to be a good thing. But I feel very strongly about people who commit suicide. I have lost people who didn't choose to die. My friend didn't get to go to highschool because of a drunk driver and I still cry for her. I will admit though that I have often thought what it would be like if I were gone. The pain everyone would go through. But I'm not willing to put them through that. You show your true strength when you push past all the bullshit of life and survive.

Wed, August 17th, 2011 7:58am


I agree Gideon your sounding like a total jackass...I dont need your help when there are people like these here who love me for who I am...THANK YOU so much for the comment Im so appreciative there are people like you who accept people like me

Wed, August 17th, 2011 1:36am


This is so sad. Im tearing up. No one should feel this way. And your not a nobody people care. I almost lost 2 close friends to suicide and I've thought about it and they felt the same way in that letter but I care if they died other of our friends care if they die. I know it's hypothetical but never try to kill yourself people care trust me! Sorry for a bit of a rant. I just hate how many teens kill themselves these days and I'm sick of it. Some people could have been saved but weren't and I don't want that to happen to anyone else. Srry again for the rant explaining my rant. P.s. Gideon sounds like a pompous asshole.

Wed, August 17th, 2011 9:11am


Yes I agree Gideon is a dick and actually at the time I was writing this I wasnt really sure it was hypothetical or not...but then it became hypothetical when I thought about it...Also dont apologize I lost my aunt to suicide and it always made me think "It cant be that simple...it just cant"...again I must say Gideon your an ass

Wed, August 17th, 2011 2:16am


OMG This is so sad, i actually started to have tear build up in my eyes reading this. I hope you NEVER EVER commit suicide you can write all about it but NEVER NEVER NEVER DO IT!!!

Fri, August 19th, 2011 6:33pm


I wont...my fans and people like you with these simply AMAZING comments keep me going...it makes me think I might actually be able to do something with my life

Fri, August 19th, 2011 3:48pm


I'd notice you're gone

I rely on your poems so much i check in every few days to see if you've written something new

Thu, September 22nd, 2011 2:58am


Really? Im so glad I have fans like you. Its truly amazing to me how much you people care THX GOTHIKAH666 T_T

Wed, September 21st, 2011 8:01pm


Aw :( this is really sad, i love your writing. But im sure your not a screw up, im highly sure your a great guy. Dont let assholes get you down, they only do it cuz they think its making them look good when really its not. So fuck them all and be yourself your amazing :D

Fri, October 14th, 2011 11:36pm

Amethyst Rose

I say I love it and I don't mean it in the "Wow i love that you wanna die!" Because thats not true at all! i've attempted suicide at least 3 times and each time I wrote a letter like this and I kept it safe when all three times have failed. So I can relate to this. My step-mom can fuck herself too ;) that's the cause of all my pain and hopefully you can get through it too. :)

Wed, November 9th, 2011 4:04pm


I like the way you describe the people as selfish and crude..thats the real fact..I agree God is just a silent person who picks favorites..you must be feeling very bad when you wrote this..and why are all people bothering about grammer in a suicide note..thats funny..you have written your emotions and please people, see what the writer has actually written..i.e. what the writer has in mind when he wrote..feel that..and not how he writes--the style and grammer..take care..

Tue, November 22nd, 2011 3:32am


Thank you very much, I tried to edit it as much as I could but like you said its my emotions...Someone who is writing a suicide note isn't going to worry about grammar so yeah...THX GOTHIKAH666 T_T

Mon, November 21st, 2011 7:34pm

The Jester of Punishment

I much rather enjoy the darkness of this. For this is bitter-sweetness when it comes to our death. Or as I see it. And in a way I know how you feel. It my step dad's falter that I am as I am now. That and my other family members. I've been ridding the train of my sanity never wanting to be free. I keep a journal of every poem, short story, letter of my darkness. You have inspired me to maybe post my dark dark stuff on my profile. Thanks. Again I love this letter. You'll have to read my letter to my blade if I get it up.


Thu, December 1st, 2011 2:27pm


Sounds great...Thank you so much Im glad you liked it

Thu, December 1st, 2011 7:13pm

Violet dusk justice finn darrot

I nearly cried-trust me, that's some compliment. I'm not in your exact position but near enough. I've written a million of those, nearly fulfilled tne promise, but somehow have always been brought around. I'm treated like shit because I'm short and goth/emo/whateverelsetheyfuckingthinkof all the time. I get you totally. I really liked it, and I loved the stepmom thing! God, if only I could say a few things to her... I'm babbling, but, loved it!=^)>~

Mon, December 12th, 2011 10:59pm


You probably don't care what I think but i'll tell ya anyway, your real good and to me reading your novels, short stories and poetry I gather a little piece of what it would be like to walk in your shoes and your way of thinking. In my eyes what you write is a reflection of your thoughts and helps people get to know you. fucked up no, everyone good goes through something tragic. loves

Wed, May 2nd, 2012 8:47pm


Hey, don't ever change anything about yourself. That's what makes you, you. And this poem is what I'm talkin about. Good work.

Wed, June 27th, 2012 2:26am

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