I woke up in the morning all alone in bed. Valentines day. Great, the day I dreaded a bit. I looked around the room as Key was gone. I slid out and took a shower and then got dressed and walked downstairs to meet the rest. Key was still not there as we ate breakfast. Jenny smiled a little. "So where do you think she ran off to?" she asked playfully. I shrugged a little. "Don't know," I said. She shrugged. We walked out to lay in the sun an hour later and Key stood there waiting for me. She smiled a little. "Morning sweetie," she said and took my hand and pulled me in and kissed me. The others continued to the pool. She bit her lip and pulled me towards another building. "Eh, Key, we were," I started but she made a move with her hand that suggested I shouldn't say anything. We came to the desk where the woman behind it smiled. "Ah, yes, it's ready," she said and escorted us down the corridor and in to a changing room where there were massage tables. "Spa day, well for a bit," she said. I blushed and bit my lip and wondered if I should tell her that I don't like strangers hands over me. I didn't have the heart to so I just did what she did and lay down. Soon two ladies came in and we just lay there.
"Why did you want to do this?" I asked carefully. "So that you would relax and as I said before, I wanted us to do things together," she said. I stared down at the floor as it felt strange to have someone else massage me. "Oh, and after this I want you to be ready to go out with me," Key said then. I sighed. "Yeah, sure," I said. "But I have to text Jenny," I said. "No, I've already done that," she said. I frowned. I guess she has planed this out then. I thought she hated valentines. We got pedicures and manicures as well. It's not really my thing but I let her decide those kind of things. Then she pulled me with her towards a mall and I just had to say something. "Key, I.." I started. "Nope, shut up, today I just want to show you some things, it's not going to be painful...unless you want it to be," she said. I blushed. Was that a sex reference?
We walked into a clothing store as she pulled me towards the guys section and looked around a bit. "What are we doing?" I asked carefully. She smirked as she grabbed a shirt and a pair of jeans and then pushed me into a changing room and handed them to me. "Put these on," she said. I sighed and changed to them as I felt a little scared of what she was doing. I looked at myself as I did look more like myself, more so than I've been lately. She opened the curtain and looked at me. "Yes, that will do," she said and closed again. "Bring 'em," she said as she walked away. I changed back to mine and then brought them out as she was standing by the cashier. She grabbed them and paid them along with something else. I didn't see since it was already in the bag. She took my hand and we walked out. "You do know I should pay for my own clothes," I said as I've never had anyone pay for my things before, well besides my parents and Jenny whenever I've fucked up. I mean, I have a huge trust fund and inheritance but I never touch that money unless it's emergasy like when I bought my apartment.
Key shrugged. "No, not when I'm the one forcing you to get them. Trust me," she said as she then pulled me into a bathroom and handed me the bag and pushed me into a stall so that I was alone. "Get dressed," she ordered. God, she's so bossy today. She's never been that way with me before. As I took out the clothes I realised what she'd actually bought. Boxers and a tighter bra. How did she even know my sizes. "Key, can I ask you something?" I asked as I started undressing. "Yeah?" she answered carefully. "How do you even know what size I am," I asked as I just pulled on the boxers and felt a little weird putting on the new bra as it made my chest almost completely flat. I do have size b on my cups so that meant it was really tight but it said b on it. Key chuckled a little. "First of all, I've undressed you once or twice so I kind of have seen the insides of your clothes and also I'm good at measuring by looks," she said. When I was completely dressed I looked at myself as I looked boyish but still a girl as my face and my hair gave me away. Why does she want me to look like a boy.
"Are you okay in there?" she asked then as I'd been quiet for a while. I didn't know how to answer. It made me feel good as this is what I'd like to wear but I always feel like someone would judge me and before Key this is what I'd buy if I'd not tried to hard to be in between, mostly because I didn't want to come out of the closet but also because I didn't know any guy or girl (if she's a lesbian) that would want me if I dressed like a guy. Whenever I saw a girl dressed as a boy it felt strange like it was someone trying to be a dyke too much. How can she want me to dress in this?
Key opened the stall door and looked at me as I was almost crying. "Oh, hey, what's wrong?" she asked carefully as she took my hand and whipped away the tear that escaped. I looked into her eyes as I wasn't sure what was wrong or what was right. "Why?" I asked as I felt how my heart hurt a little. She looked sad but like she felt for me. "Because I know this is what you'd want to wear, I know by the way you look at clothes, that you don't feel confident in some clothes. Am I right?" she asked carefully. I swallowed hardly and nodded a little. "But I look like a dyke," I whispered and looked down as I wasn't sure what she'd say. "No, you're cute. I wouldn't let you wear flannel or leather like that. You look like a really cute girl but you also look like a small cute boy," she whispered. I bit my lip. "Yeh, but do you really like that?" I asked as I didn't know how to deal with it. What if she was more interested in guys. She looked at me and sighed. "Faith, I like you as you are. I've told you I'm more interested in women before and I don't mind guys but I still like you more than any of that. If you want to wear a soft t-shirt and skinny jeans, that's fine I think you look hot and comfortable in your own skin. If you want to wear a dress and keep being normal but uncomfortable to yourself because you think that will be better, I still think you're hot. To me either is fine. I love you and all of you and I want you to know that. I want you to be happy," she said softly. I felt like crying but instead I kissed her deeply as I wrapped my arms around her.
We stood there in the bathroom kissing for a long time. "By the way, now your underwear matches mine," she whispered. I blushed a bit as I pulled out her pants to take a look. She had blue lace hipsters in the same colour as my boxers. Then she pulled out her shirt as well so that I could see some of her bra as it was the same colour. I knew she'd made my bra and my underwear the same shades and everything. It was a little cute. "It's cute and I love it but please don't make us in to Seth and Bella," I whispered. She grinned. "Never, that's just creepy. I just think if we want to take photos later on I'd like us to match," she whispered. I nodded and kissed her as we then put everything in a bag and walked out.
She laced her fingers with mine as we walked towards the ocean where the docs where. I was kind of wondering where we were going but she wouldn't answer even if I tried so I just leaned my head on her shoulder a little as we walked. Then she walked up to a huge white boat. "What is that?" I asked as she just stepped on board but turned to help me. She raised an eyebrow. "The sunseeker, it's a yacht," she said. I took her hand and followed her as I felt a little shocked. She smirked as she walked in under it and I did as well. It felt huge inside as it had living room, kitchen bathroom and two bedrooms. What was more shocking was probably that there was rose pedals on the bed and a bit of every where and champagne and whine and other liquors as well as fruit and food, already stocked in. Key turned to me and smiled. "Do you like it?" she asked. I swallowed. This is a time when I can't tell her I'm scared of drowning or being on a boat. "Yeah, it's great," I said. She grinned and pulled me with her upstairs as she then removed some ropes and then got up and started the boat and we drove out. "How do you even know how to drive one of these?" I asked shocked. She smirked and shook her head a little. "I don't live with Heather because I can't afford any place it's more or less because it's hard to get one that I like. My parents have one of these that I usually used as a party boat," she explained. I felt stunned but nodded a little.
She then turned around as she remembered something and she took up a Rose and gave it to me. I looked stunned at her as she smiled softly. "God, you lied. You said you didn't do valentine," I said as I felt slightly betrayed. She smirked. "Of course I said that. You looked so stressed about it and besides today I want to court you. Next year's your turn," she said and winked. I blushed and looked at the Rose. She really meant it. I felt it warm up inside me. "So what time are we returning this?" I asked. She shook her head. "I rented it for the entire weekend. Today it's just you and me and then tomorrow we'll have the rest with us," she said.
She parked in the middle of the blue sea and then took my hand as she led me downstairs again and she gave me a glass of wine. I bit my lip as we sat down for a bit. "Should you drink if you have to drive the boat back?" I asked. She smirked. "It's fine. We're not going back until the morning," she said then. I nodded even if that scared me a little. I know I haven't had sex with her a whole lot and I feel like I have to be so great at it and focus on what I'm doing when we're actually doing it, so how am I supposed to do this when everything's moving? I drank some wine while we talked about normal things. Eventually we drank something stronger and she started playing music as we started dancing together. I had my camera so I took a few photos. She'd grab my camera and turn it to me. I would blush and try to get it back but still stand still and do as she asked. It was just a lot of fun to play around with her.
When we then walked into the bedroom I felt nervous again. She looked back at me as we got closer to the bed. She pulled me in and kissed me as she breathed out a little. "Did I do okay?" She asked in a whisper. At first I didn't know what she was talking about, but then realised she meant about the entire day. "Yes," I answered and kissed her neck a little. She moved her hands over my body a little as she then started removing my shirt. I felt myself tremble a little but swallowed it and removed her shirt and then pushed her on to the bed and kissed her stomach and up as I let my hands feel her body. She was breathing slightly unevenly and trembling a little bit. I looked up at her as I felt unfocused but just looking into her eyes I got all the focus I needed.
We made out and played around in there as well. We took photos and she was right taking a photo of our legs and out panties did look great when we had matching underwear. She'd still take photos of both of us as I tried to figure out a good motive. I put down my camera after a while and kissed her deeply as I slid my hands over her body a little as I admired it a little. I wish I was as fit as her. Not only just for her but so that I'd be more even to her.
"I still can't believe how beautiful you are," I whispered. She smiled a little. "No, believe me it takes effort," she whispered. I nodded a little. "How do you do it?" I asked softly as I still let my hands flow over her body and her pants a little. "I train every day, I have to think about what I eat and it's hell really," she whispered. I frowned a little as I looked at her. "Why, why do you do it if it doesn't make you happy?" I asked carefully. She breathed out a little and turned her head to the side. "Because, like you, I feel insecure and most people do. I figured if I was ever going to get anyone to fall in love with me I'd have to look good and not have handles," she whispered. I frowned and kissed her softly.
"I wouldn't mind that. But hey, if we ever get married you are allowed to let yourself go," I whispered and kissed her cheek. She blushed and shook her head a little. "Oh, really only then?" she asked. I smirked a little. "Yes, because you probably want to look great on your wedding," I whispered as I felt that I was being ridicules. She giggled a little. "You're so full of shit right now," she said and pushed me over so that she was on top of me. I looked up at her. Then she looked a little seriously at me. "Do you honestly feel that way?" she asked. I got up on my elbows. "I will always love you no matter what," I answered and looked seriously at her.
She sighed and smiled a little. "I kind of hate you right now," she said as she looked up at the roof. I raised one eyebrow. "Why?" I asked. She looked down at me as she was blushing. "Because I want you so much and you keep making me fall for you and you don't even realise the magnitude of your words to me. It seems so easy for you to say that," she whispered. I laid a hand on her cheek. "Maybe because I mean it and because it's true," I answered. She bit her lip. "No, because your heart isn't broken. Yes you've been through pain but not from trusting the wrong person," she said. I nodded a little as it made me worried. She kissed me lightly. "But what you're saying is that because your hearts damaged you don't want to hear it and that why you don't like it," I said as it made me feel a little bad. She sighed and looked down a little as she was positioning herself between my legs. "I guess. No I don't guess. I know I'm scared," she whispered.
I sighed and looked up a little as I felt her lips touch my stomach a little. "Key, stop," I whispered. She looked up at me a bit worried. I sat up so that we both sat closely. "I don't want to if you feel insecure. I might not have gotten my heart broken before and I don't want to either, but mostly I don't want to hurt you at all," I said. She searched my face a little. She seemed to deliberate on what to say. She sighed and moved a strain of hair back from my face. "Faith, I'm not really insecure but it's...it's hard to explain why I'm scared of this," she whispered. I sighed and looked down a little. I felt her cheek and her breath against the side of my face.
"Could you at least try?" I asked carefully as I was starting to feel really worried. She nodded as she looked like she was deliberating again. "When I broke up with my ex, I swore I wouldn't let myself fall so fast for someone else. When I saw you, you completely ruined all of that. A part of me thought I shouldn't but then you spoke and I noticed how shy and withdrawn you were, that's why I started flirting with you. You didn't go for it, I mean I knew you noticed but you didn't seem to want to notice it. That's how you protect yourself. So once I got you to admit to feeling the same and once I got you...," she stopped and then tried to find other words. "In bed," I said as I thought she might say something terrible. She sighed and nodded. "You were just so completely open to me and I was still just trying to be close to you. I didn't think you would sleep with me and yet you did and seemed eager to. That took a lot from me. I love you and I can feel that you love me too but from that first day I met you until now I never imagined you'd be this open about your feelings. It's a lot. I'm more scared of hurting you than you hurting me and that's really the crazy part," she said. I felt a lump in my throat and nodded a little.
She slid her hand down my arm a little and bit her lip. "Could you do something for me?" she asked then. I looked at her waiting for her request. "Could you pretend that this is just a random shag, that you'd just act on your desires and not your feelings?" she asked. I felt a little stunned. "You want me to shut off my feelings?" I asked to make sure I understood her right. She nodded a little. "Yes for now," she said. I felt how that made me really sad and hurt but as I felt that I shut it off fast. I didn't want to feel hurt or sad right now. It doesn't matter if I love her or how much I love her. This is what she asked for. I closed my eyes and prepared myself and then I just pushed her over as I kissed her body a bit as I slid down and removed her pants and panties at the same time. She gasped in shock but I didn't care. If sex is what she wants that's what she's going to get. I don't even want to think about any of these things.
I just ravished her to the point where she'd cum so much she could barely control any part of her body and dose off fast afterwards. I kissed her shoulder lightly and then got up and dressed and walked up on deck as I sat down and looked at the night sky. I felt a bit empty inside. What just happened? Why would she do this to me? I kept trying to get off the twitching feeling in my body as I felt the anxiety coming on. God, I'm in the middle of the sea and I don't even have my pills! I walked around, bent over double to get it to stop but it didn't so I just kept breathing for hours. I was actually glad she was sleeping even if it made me feel terrible somehow.
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