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Thankfully Sophia and I got far enough away from the scene that we were not bother by the cops and managed to get to my truck and escape.

Unfortunately for my dad my idiot brother was not so lucky and was arrested along with a lot of others that didn’t manage to escape in time.

Dad had gone down to the police station to bail him out and was in one hell of a mood when he got back.

Pointing an angry finger at the kitchen table he ordered Dean to sit down “what the hell were you thinking, illegal racing.”

Dean dropped his head and sighed “I’m sorry dad but I have my reason for doing what I did.”

Dad dropped down into a seat opposite to him while I leant against the counter “well let’s hear the great reason for breaking the law” Dean shook his head “I can’t tell you why I did it dad but what about Heath she was there and even punched me so why aren’t you reading her the riot act.”

Dad looked over to me with a look that said we will talk later before turning back to Dean “your sister was not racing and she did not need me to bail out of jail and I am guessing she punched you when she realized what you were doing.”

Dad ran his hand through his hair and looked anguished “I have no choice but to pull you from the rest of the racing season since you would have been banned anyway however you will be working your ass of around here helping to keep Heath’s car going any other work that needs doing now please go to your room we will talk again in the morning.”

Dean stood up and started to storm towards the door muttering to himself about how unfair dad was being when Jessie wouldn’t be getting the riot act like he was “wait” I cried.

Dean turned around to fix me with his angry eyes “what?” I curled my hands together and looked at him pleadingly “what happened to Jess?”

He shrugged then started to turn away “his brother bailed him out so I am guessing he went home with him.”

Maybe I should have been grateful that he wasn’t still sitting in a jail cell but somehow I think he would have been better of there rather then at his home facing his brother even if he had won the race against Dean.

Dad was still sitting at the table looking worried himself, I hesitantly walked over and sat down beside him and took his hand in mine making him look at me.

Taking a deep breath I got right to what I had on my mind “daddy you know that Jess is getting hurt all the time and isn’t safe where he is so I was thinking we have room here and maybe we could offer for him to live here with us.”

Dad patted my hand and shook his head “as much as I would love to help Jess honey we both know that he wouldn’t except it and after he got Dean into illegal racing I am having second thoughts about him even being around you guys.”

Tears stung my eyes and I cursed my weakness “daddy please he needs us” he shook his head then pushed his way to his feet “honey unless Jess comes to me asking for help then there is nothing I can do, I’m sorry.”

That night sleep did not come easy when I was so worried about Jessie and what he might be going through.

The next morning I had to force myself out of bed then to get ready for school, dad and Dean were already up and about but neither of them was talking to each other leaving breakfast an uncomfortable affair that I was only too happy to escape from.

Sophia was waiting anxiously by locker when I got into school, I walked over and leant back against my locker “hey” I muttered.

She gave me a concerned look “is everything okay?” I shook my head “Dean was an idiot and now he and dad are not talking to each other making it very uncomfortable at home.”

Sophia squeezed my arm so hard that I wince and shot her a what the hell look “sorry, is Dean alright, is he in a lot of trouble?” I shook my head “the police basically slapped him on the wrist since it was his first offence however dad had no choice but to pull him from the rest of the racing season.”

Sophia gave a sad sigh “poor Dean” I shot her a look of outrage “poor Dean, may I remind you that he was the one there racing illegally and was stupid enough to get caught so poor Dean my ass, because of him we have a race car sitting in the shed with no one to race it.”

Sophia shook my a look of reproach “yes and I am sure that he feels bad about that but it cannot be easy for him always having to work so hard to be as nearly as good as you on the race track.”

Shaking my head I gave a harsh laugh “if he wanted to be as good as me then he would work harder but instead he does everything he possibly can to get out of it, so I am sorry Sop but my brother has brought everything on himself and if I was at that police station last night then I would have made sure he got more then just a warning.”

Sophia looked hurt by the lack of concern I had for my brother but what did she expect when Dean was always doing things to piss me off and ruin things for dad “sometimes Heath you can be a real bitch” she muttered before moving of down the hall towards where Dean and Jessie was standing talking to others.

Laying my head against my locker I closed my eyes and wondered why I didn’t just stay home in bed.

Someone brushing my hair away from the side of my face had me opening my eyes and turning my head to find Jessie leaning against the locker beside mine “are you okay?” I nodded then started to turn away “I’m sorry about getting your brother in trouble with the law.”

Swinging my eyes back towards him I glared at him “you are the reason my brother was there, why would you drag him into something like that?” Jessie looked away and gave a heavy sigh “it’s complicated and I am sorry that he got into trouble.”

When he would have walked away I grabbed his arm but quickly dropped it when he gave a wince “are you alright?” He looked at me sadly then shook his head “I don’t want you worrying about me anymore Heath, I will catch you later.”

He walked back down the hall and said something to Dean and their friends before disappearing around the corner.

Giving a sigh I grabbed my books from my locker then slowly made my way towards my first class.

Sophia was in the same class as me but this time when she entered the room she avoided sitting anywhere near me choosing instead to sit near the cheerleaders that liked to give me such a hard time.

Looking at her sadly I felt tears sting my eyes, why was she so angry with me over Dean when he was the one that messed up.

Looking away before her or anyone else could see my tears I looked out the window sadly while waiting for class to begin and it was like someone wanted to complete my misery when I saw Jessie and the girl Gabriella heading towards the school sheds.

Damn it hurt feeling like he was betraying me even though I had made it clear that I wasn’t willing to have anything with him, I certainly did expect him to start bumping uglies with other girls quit so quickly.

Feeling sick to my stomach as I watched him push the girl against the side of shed I jumped to my feet and rushed from the room with Sophia’s eyes following me.

Heading straight to the nurse’s office I was able to convince her that I was sick enough to warrant going home so I made my escape as quick as possible.

It wasn’t like I lied to the school nurse because after seeing Jessie with that girl I was feeling ill but that also may have had something to do with not getting enough sleep last night.

When I got home dad was just leaving the house heading towards the shed, he paused when he saw me giving me a confused look “hey honey what are you doing home already?” I shrugged looking at him sadly “I wasn’t feeling well so the school nurse sent me home.”

He searched my face and I was obviously looking sick enough to convince him since he nodded “alright you head up your room I will check on you in a little while.”

Grateful that he wasn’t asking questions I rushed into the house and up to my room slipping on my sleep clothes before sliding between my nice cold sheets and closing my eyes.

Voices speaking outside my door penetrated my sleep but I just laid there with my eyes closed listening to my dad and Dean whispering about me.

Dad: “what the hell was he thinking doing something like that when he had made us all believe that Heath was what he wanted?”

Dean: “dad we all know that jess is going through a lot of shit at the moment so he is trying to cope the best he can.”

Dad sighed “yeah well I am glad that he is doing okay I just wish your sister didn’t get her heart broken in the process.”

Dean: “yeah me too, I know I was weird about them being together but it would have been kind of great seeing my best friend happy with my sister.”


As their voices drifted away I fell back to sleep with tears wetting my cheeks and ache in my heart that I didn’t think would ever go away.

Dad came in at dinner time carrying a tray that had me feeling like hurling at the thought of eating it but not wanting to disappoint my dad when he had gone to so much trouble to make all my favourites I forced every last bit past my tight throat while praying that it would stay down.

Dad sat silently watching me and when I finished he took the tray pressing a kiss to my head “get some more sleep honey and will see how you are feeling in the morning.”

Laying back down I gave him a weak smile “thanks daddy” he nodded then headed towards the door pausing to look back at me sadly before going out and closing the door quietly behind him.

Laying on my back I stared up at the roof and told myself that I was finished feeling sorry for myself, that I had pushed Jessie away so I had to accept that he was seeing other girls, racing was all that mattered now and nothing else.

Jessie wasn’t my problem anymore, he could do what he wanted and see who he wanted and I would just continue on with my own life and forget all about him.

That is what I told myself as I again fell into a restless sleep but telling yourself and being able to do it proved to be harder then I ever thought especially when Jessie started becoming a permanent fixture in our lives.












Submitted: September 01, 2012

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