………… We all spent the night dancing and drinking and catching up. I walked over to the couches and sat down and put my feet up across Kerion’s lap as he talked with his Brother and Dan.
“So I have to ask you this because… well I love you and you’re my cousin” Xander sat next to me looking serious I looked at him with curiosity “He’s old enough to be your Dad well just about. What the hell are you doing?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Chad… You know Chad Kroeger” he nodded in the direction of where Chad was talking to his brother and Pete “We all saw the pictures in the magazine. Reba delighted in showing us all to include Dimitri… then tonight we all walk in here I look round to find you and you two are missing and are behind closed doors in the limo still”
“There’s nothing going on” I put my head on his shoulder “I swear to you Xander all Chad and I was doing was talking that’s it…. There is a lot of things going on right now to do with the tour and our careers”
“Chris, He had your lipstick on him and his shirt was inside out… remind me again of what you’re career choice is at the moment” I raised my eye brows at him
“We’re giving the press something and nothing that’s all… it’s fun and gives me some outlet for frustration” I looked at him “Xander on Jess’s life I swear that Chad and I are friends only” Xander leant back and looked at me.
“Okay but what about Dimi?” He asked
“For now I’m done Xander. I’ve spent the last 3 years in a controlling relationship that took so much out of me I can’t even begin to tell you how low I really did get” I got up “You want to go talk some where quieter?” he nodded, we both walked away from the noise of the club to the outdoor terrace. I sat on one of the outdoor couches only the dull thud of the bass and the chirp of crickets the only sounds out there in the stillness of the night.
“I can’t believe we’re in Spain” Xander smiled as he looked round over the edge of the terrace, he stepped back and came and sat next to me “So where were we?” I ran my finger down the side of the beer bottle I had wiping off the condensation
“We were talking about Dimitri” I sighed “I love him… I can’t help it he’s… I don’t know, he’s what I wanted in a guy till I realized he doesn’t like not being in control of things, in control of me, he’s so like his Mom” I chewed the inside of my cheek and took a drink “Why didn’t you call me and let me know about him and Reba?” I focused on Xander and watched his jaw line tighten
“Oh yeah what am I supposed to do, call you and say what ‘hey Chris guess what happened when we all went to the beach last night. Dimi and Reba got it on in the dunes and she screamed his name loud enough to drown out the ocean” Xander held out his arms, he was angry and hurt that his best friend could do it to me “How was I supposed to tell you that and break your heart?” I felt a heavy feeling in my chest “Believe me It took everything I had, Jackson had and hell Niko had for that matter not to beat the crap outta him, he wasn’t ever going to come clean to you that’s not Dimitri Carpov… I knew it was going to come down to one of us having to tell you and better that it’s me rather than someone else” he had a snap in his tone
“When?” my voice was a little shaky
“When what?” He groaned as he took a drink from his bottle
“Did he and Reba hook up?” I heard a groan
“Do we have to go there?” He looked away from me and sank his beer
“The day that he got back from seeing you in Wisconsin” He braced his elbows on his knees and turned his head to look at me “I’m sorry”
“You’re kidding” my heart was in my throat and I felt like I wanted to be sick “After everything he did and said when he came up there… after he told me he wouldn’t hurt me” I got up and paced “After he told me how much he loved me and after… after…” Xander got up quickly and wrapped his arms round me. I was gasping for air my entire body trembled.
“And you wonder why I didn’t tell you?” he sighed he held my face in his hands “Chris calm down” Xander sat me down on the couch and knelt on the floor “I’m sorry no one told you but look at what you’re doing with your life look at what you have now. It has to hurt you I get it but you are better than this”
“Am I such a bad person that I can’t find a guy that is good” I wiped the tears “What did I do that was so wrong?”
“Hey you guys okay?” Jackson walked over to us he put his drink down on the table
“I just told her about Dimitri” Xander said not taking his eyes from me.
“Oh” Jackson sat next to me “Chris I’m sorry he’s such a douche right now”
“I need a drink” I got up and walked away from them. I pulled open the door and went back into the noise of the club and walked over to the table and poured a shot of Jack from the bottle on the table.
“Hey” Kerion touched my arm “you’ve been crying”
“Yep” I knocked back the drink and poured another “I hope to good you guys are good with me getting drunk off my ass tonight because that’s the plan right now” I sniffed knocking back the shot. “I need to talk to Chad”
I picked up the bottle and walked past Kerion. I felt empty right now Dimitri had taken it all from me right now the trust I had in him was a joke. All I had was the band and my little sister and I had to hold onto that as much as possible right now to stop me from going totally insane.
“Hey You” Chad smiled moving up in the seat he was in for me to sit down “How’s it seeing your family?”
“Right now it sucks” I poured a drink Ryan looked at Chad
“Yeah you find out stuff that hurts like a bitch” I knocked the drink back and reached for the bottle Mike took it from me “Hey” I glared at him
“Chris what’s going on?” Ryan moved forward in his seat
“I’m getting drunk” I looked at the glass in my hands
“Well we can see that” Mike said taking the glass from me. I took a deep breath my head swam a little and I looked at all of them as Dan came over.
“If Kerion, Alfie and Pete agree will you take us on” I slurred the effects of the Jack starting to hit me
“What do you mean?” Chad leant forward and narrowed his eyes
“Whoa what happened?” Dan looked like I’d slapped him with a wet fish
“Remember what I said about feeling like a puppet” Chad nodded “well I’m a puppet that’s being made to look like an idiot” I ground my teeth together tears threatened but didn’t dare spill over again “I’m not going to be pushed by someone just because I’m supposed to be the right person for her son… what did you call me before”
I looked at Chad “His fucking meal ticket”
“Okay honey you’re drunk” Chad put his hand over mine “Yes we’re willing to become your managers we’ve spoken about it a lot, but we can talk about this tomorrow when we’ve all had a lot less to drink”
“Fine” I suddenly felt exhausted “I’m going to back to the hotel”
“You want me to take you?” Chad got up with me
“Right now I don’t know what I want other than Elena and the Carpov’s outta my life” I felt the tears prick my eyes again, I took a deep breath “I’m sorry” I composed myself as much as I could “You took a risk with us and I’m a damn basket case” I grabbed my purse and turned on my heel and headed for the exit, Xander caught up to me.
“Chirs” he tugged me round to face him
“Xander right now don’t okay…” I held up my finger to him as I swayed a little “I’m hurt, I’m drunk and I’ll say something that will upset both of us” I shrugged Kerion came over.
“I’ll take you back” he looked atXander “I got her” Kerion put his arm around my waist and we headed out of the club. Why the hell was this happening? I wanted to go to bed and wake up and for the whole Dimitri thing to have gone away………………….
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