JUST OVER A YEAR LATER.....
Are you sure doctor, I said
Yes I’m sorry Mrs Mauzon, it has spread.
So how long have I got then, I said wiping my eyes.
Can’t say for sure, but hopefully a year or more, the doctor said compassionately.
A year, is that it? And I have so much planned, what a bugger I said.
Mrs Mauzon, have you spoke to anyone else about this, the doctor asked.
No doctor, I haven’t told anyone else, I said knowing I would have to get things in to order soon.
It might be time to tell them, he replied.
Yeah maybe when I come back from Mexico, I am going out there for a month, maybe the last time I go there, so I want to enjoy it without this hanging over my head, I told him.
Well we can make sure you are comfortable, and not in pain, the doctor said.
Well to be honest doc, I don’t fancy waiting to die, I will do what I need to do, while I still can, then I am off to Switzerland. I said knowing what I wanted.
Do you mean Dignitas, he replied?
Yep, can you get the paper work for me, I asked him
If that’s what you want Mrs Mauzon, the doctor said.
Doctor, I have more money then, I can spend, but not one penny of it will kill this cancer, will it.
I am afraid not he said.
Well then, I want to die with dignity then, I said, realising this was for real.
Ok Mrs Mauzon, I will get the forms ready, he said.
I got up and shook his hand, and told him thanks for all he had done for me.
He wished me well, and I walked out of his office.
I was numb, but there was nothing more I could do.
My time was nearly up.
I only discovered I had skin cancer a few months back when I went into a private hospital for, a boob job, and tummy tuck.
I decided to treat myself, seeing I had the money to do so.
I had no idea a mole on my back, had gone bad, and it was only the surgeon doing my boob job who spotted it.
I still had the operations, but the tests came back it was stage four melanoma, so I went back into hospital to have the mole and a few lymph nodes removed.
But today I was told the news it had spread and before long, other organs in my body would be riddled with cancer and not long after death would come.
But I was not going to wait to die, I wanted out when the time was right.
I must of been walking around with it for ages, apart from my depression, I had no other symptoms.
But I or anyone else, would never of known.
Just one of those things.
Me, and Emilio and the kids were off to Mexico for a month, for a holiday.
Which would now be my last.
Emilio did not know I was ill, I told him my hospital appointments were to do with my surgery.
Even with the mole cut of my back, I told him, they needed to take some skin from my back, in case it was needed elsewhere.
If he believed me or not I don’t know, but he never questioned it.
I so wanted to tell someone my problem, but after the years of relying on others, when I was down, or depressed I hopped I would fight it and never have to tell them.
But I was not going to win this, and would eventually have to tell them all.
I got back home, and Emilio was running about all over the house getting stuff ready.
Poppy, came running up to see me.
Hello girl, I said patting her head.
She would be leaving us for the last time today, to stay permanently, on the farm.
I would miss her but it was not fair on her here as we were away, or out a lot, and we did not have time for her.
She loved it on the farm, and I could go and see her when I was home in bath.
I bent down and gave her a hug.
She had been my companion when I was on my own and had next to nothing.
But I knew she would be going to good people who loved her like I did.
I called for everyone to come say good bye to her.
Sam and Joseph, came and hugged her, Sam started crying.
Poppy licked her face.
Think of it like she is going on a holiday like us, I said to the twins, but inside I was welling up.
Then Emilio came to say good bye to poppy.
He looked at me and could see I was upset.
But for other reasons as well, that he did not know of.
Are you ok he asked?
Yeah, I said.
Everything ok at the hospital, he said bending down to hug poppy.
Yeah I said, as a tear fell from my eye.
He got back up, and looked at me.
I went to get poppy’s lead and her things.
Right I am off, I said, I won’t be long.
I put poppy’s lead on her, and took her to the car.
In the short drive to the farm, I told poppy of my cancer and told her I would miss her and sorry she was going.
If she understood me or not who knows, but when I got to the farm, I didn’t stay long.
She came here often but now this would be her permanent home.
I gave her a hug and a kiss and watched her run off to be with the other dogs,
I handed her stuff over to the farmer, then got into the car and drove off, back home.
I pulled in before I got home and sobbed my heart out.
For me, and for poppy.
When I got home again, Emilio had got all the cases packed, and they were by the front door.
The mini bus will be here in an hour he told me.
He was still running about the house getting it into order.
I was dreading the long journey; we had to get to London first then the long flight to Mexico.
But we had a share in a plane, coast us a few million but was worth it.
We could go anywhere in the world when we needed.
Seeing Emilio was back to singing.
We had a house keeper, who would watch the house while we were away.
But we still liked to leave it clean, before we left.
I kept the pain relief the doctor had given me, in my handbag, when we got to the airport, I would have to declare it but I would say it was for my recent plastic surgery, for the pain of that.
Emilio was chatting to the twins while I made myself a cup of tea.
But all three of them kept looking over at me.
What were they up to I wondered.
Everything ok, I shouted out.
Oh yes, love Emilio replied.
Yes mum the twins said.
I drank my tea, and went to get changed.
I had a quick shower.
I loved my new boobs, and tummy.
Just a shame I would not be able to enjoy them for long.
Emilio said he liked me how I was, but was happy with what I wanted to do with my body.
So for my birthday, I booked to have the surgery.
It bloody hurt afterwards, but I was so happy with the results, I wasn’t getting any younger, so why not.
I just wished, I had discovered the mole earlier and maybe I would of had more time, now I was living on borrowed time.
I got dressed, and Emilio shouted up to say it was nearly time.
I came down and they were all waiting for me.
I looked at them all.
My beautiful family.
Samantha and Joseph started giggling.
They would soon be fifteen, but I would not see their sixteenth birthday.
The mini bus was here.
Right lets go Emilio said opening the door.
It was like he was on a mission.
He had organised this holiday.
But it was like he was planning something, else as well.
When we go to the airport the kids, were all excited.
What’s up with them I asked Emilio.
I don’t know, he said also acting all suspicious.
Then I saw them.
Walking towards us with their cases, were James, ruby, Nicole, Gilb, Harvey, Kate, Michael and his wife, a few of his opera colleges, and my parents.
What’s going on I said.
Emilio, smiling, told me we were all off to Mexico so we could re new our wedding vows.
I was in shock.
Emilio took a small box out of his coat pocket.
And, got down on one knee.
Everyone stood around to hear what he had to say.
Liz, me and you have had our ups and downs, with have had good times and bad times.
But we have got through it all.
And it is obvious we are, meant to be together.
So I was wondering if you will marry me all over again.
I looked at everyone, and they were all waiting with baited breath.
Then I looked back down at Emilio.
I started to well up.
Of course I will, I said as tears rolled down my check.
He got up and kissed me.
I hugged him tight.
Then he took hold of my wedding finger and slipped the new ring on.
It sat on top of the wedding and engagement ring he had gave me all those years ago.
I felt so loved.
And was happy, that our close friends and family would be there to share it with us.
But was shocked to see my parents.
How did Emilio convinced them to come?
When we arrived in Mexico, hours later, some of our party were staying in a hotel not far from our villa.
So our private couch dropped those off, while me Emilio , the twins, my parents, James, ruby, Nicole, Gilb and Harvey went to our villa.
Emilio had arranged a party at the villa, and when we got in people were there cooking food, and organising, the house, for our guests.
We are to have a joint hen and stag party tonight, he told me.
I was so excited.
You organised all this I said.
Well I had to get in a little bit of help but yes I did most of the planning, he said, so happy with himself.
Tomorrow we would renew our vows on the beach not from our villa.
I did wonder if he found out about my cancer, and this is why he had decided to do all this.
When everyone arrived we all had a good time.
We had a mariachi band, and Emilio could not help himself but join in with them.
And even James sang a few songs.
I was so happy.
The twins were even spending time with my parents.
Me, and dad had a chat.
Surprised to see you out here dad.
Well he said trying to play the big man, Emilio insisted we come.
Seeing as I never came to your first wedding.
I said nothing.
And to be honest, I have missed you.
That shocked me, and I looked at mum who smiled.
I have missed you too dad, I said.
Maybe I have not agreed with all you have done, but you’re a grown woman and you make your own choices in life now.
Emilio really loves you, money or no money, dad carried on, and you seem to be good together.
Yes we are dad, I said.
Well that’s good enough for me, he said.
I hugged him.
And he hugged me.
After all these years, of not liking each other, and not speaking my dad, who I had craved love from, told me he was happy for me.
I reached over and hugged mum.
I was so blessed that my parents could be with me, before I left this planet.
All of us had a great night.
We all drank and danced the night away.
I was so excited for the wedding tomorrow.
I woke up to an empty bed.
I had hardly slept, as it was so hot.
I just lay in Emilio’s arms, all night.
The men had got up and gone to the hotel down the road to get ready.
I don’t know what time it was, but somewhere in the villa, I could hear voices, then loud music.
The marriage of Figaro by Mozart started playing.
It made me smile, and I got up out of bed.
Put my dressing gown on, and walked into the lounge to see Samantha, and Nicole, being made up.
Two stylists were doing their hair and makeup.
Mum and Kate were already dressed ready, for the wedding.
Michael’s wife and his opera friends wives were also dressed and ready.
Nicole looked over.
Emilio rang to see if everything was going ok, and I said you were still asleep, so he told me to play this music very loud.
I love this music I said all excited.
Then a Mexican woman called Betty came up to me,
Ahh Mrs Mauzon, i am here to dress you.
She was carrying a wedding dress.
Mr Mauzon hopes you like it she said holding it up for me to see.
I looked at mum, with my mouth wide open.
Then I looked back at the dress.
It was beautiful.
I hoped it fit me.
Mrs Mauzon, I can also a just this dress if need be, so if you want to try it on now, and then I can see if anything needs fixing.
She came with me into my bedroom.
I needed a shower, but put the dress on looked in the full length mirror in my bedroom.
The dress fitted just right.
No alterations would be needed.
You look lovely the lady said.
And he picked this dress, I asked while still staring at it in the mirror.
Yes Mr Mauzon, organised everything, you are lucky to have him, I wish my husband was as organised, she said laughing.
I got back out of the dress, and thanked her.
I told her I would have a shower, get my hair and makeup sorted then could she help me back in the dress.
She told me that is what she was here for.
I went and got a cup of tea, and some toast.
I had to take my medication, without out anyone noticing.
I had to take twelve pills a day now, and was surprised I had hid it from everyone for this long.
Then Sam came up to me, her hair and makeup all done.
Mum the flowers have arrived.
Ahh good, I said.
Thank god, I had took the pills before she came in or she would of asked questions.
Mum I have organised a surprise for dad.
Oh really honey what’s that.
Well of course I could not tell you before but, I got in contact, with Aunty Joanna, and she is out here as well, and coming to the wedding, Sam said all happy.
Oh Sam that’s great, I am sure dad will be over the moon.
Emilio did not see his family much.
A bit like me I, suppose.
Samantha you look beautiful I said to her.
I need to get my dress on, she said, running back into the lounge.
Nicole and Sam were going to be my bridesmaids, like when I first married Emilio.
I made sure I hid my medication and then went to get a shower.
When I got out everyone was dressed and ready, and were waiting for me, to get my hair and makeup done.
Nicole and Samantha were wearing long dark blue bridesmaid dresses, that matched my wedding dress.
Samantha looked so grown up.
I cried tears of joy.
Mum stepped forward and hugged me.
Come on love let’s get you ready, she said.
Half hour later, I was ready.
I stepped out of my bedroom, and felt a hundred million dollars.
I thanked the stylists and Betty, who helped dress me Nicole and Samantha.
Everyone said how nice I looked.
Emilio did a good job I said.
He did, everyone said
Right let’s get this show on the road I said picking up my bouquet of blue and white flowers.
I could not wait to see Emilio.
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