Not another Fantasy Novel
“Oh, hello, I suppose I’m narrating this then. Ugh, do I really have to do this?” a voice with no body proclaims. “Nay, you promised!” yet another disembodied voice shouts out. “But no one cares about this stupid story” The first voice argues “Nay, stop breaking the fourth wall! You’re ruining the reader’s immersion” the second voice returns “What immersion? The book hasn’t even begun yet” the first voice questions “Yes it has! We’re already in the first chapter”. The voices argue for several minutes, but the first voice soon submits. “No fair, you’re not allowed to just use the book to control me” says the first voice. “Too bad it’s written now, you have to go along” the second voice returns “Fine. Spoilt brat” the first voice finishes.
This is the story of us, me, Nay Fairfax and the other one, Kenneth Clearwater, for some reason Kenneth has requested I narrate this story, I can only put it down to the fact that I’m so much more intelligent and amazing than him. We grew up as neighbours in south London. Kenneth has short straight blonde hair, blue eyes and was ALWAYS about 4 or 5 inches taller than me, he was always the one with a girlfriend, and he always got perfect results on every test he took. I have perfect brown hair and even more perfect brown eyes, and I am adorably short; oh one more thing and we are necromancers. Well not yet, well we ARE, we just don’t know it at this point. Kenneth was the first to discover his powers, he was 5, the show-off that he was, he accidentally brought his dead hamster back to life ‘Mr. Cuddles’ was somewhat less cuddly as his name suggested after that, mostly due to the bright yellow eyes, the flaps of lose skin on his constantly decomposing body and finally the awful smell he constantly produced, nevertheless Kenneth decided against killing. Killing? RE-killing? That was always something we could never decide on, if something is already dead, how can you kill it? In any case, he kept his zombie hamster. Some called him a child genius; however I think it’s a load of crap, and he’s just been sponging off of my perfect mind.
Me however, I believed that the reason I took longer is because my mind is naturally a perfectionist, besides, my feat was much more spectacular, I brought a dead cat back to life, a cat is much bigger than a measly hamster, unfortunately unlike him, I could not live with such a imperfect thing, so I decided, and no matter what he says it was MY decision, to relinquish control over the thing and I LET it go on a rampage killing birds in the neighbourhood, it was an experiment!
In any case, I suppose this all started on Kenneth’s 18th birthday, cliché, I know. I was only 17 however; he was exactly a month older than me, September 18th. Exactly when it’s not too hot and not too cold, my birthday was October 18th for those not very good at maths, it was always too cold to go outside, but it never once snowed near my birthday. So we were all sitting around Kenneth table gathered for his birthday, his family all there, chatting away looking like well, a family something I rarely experienced. My father left my mum when I was 4, no matter how much I asked, she never told me why, she’s always just say “Just be glad he’s gone, you’ll thank me when you’re older” but I still didn’t know what she meant, all I know is that what that did was make our family, well, much less of a family, we were more like co-workers, she’d still look after me and I’m sure she still loved me, but we’d only talk when it was necessary and she’d never hug or kiss me. My thought was interrupted by the lights turning off and a glow slowly entering through the doorway, his mother entered holding a spectacular cake, so big i thought she might topple over, I smile at the thought, the smell of melting wax fills my nose, I love that smell it reminds me I get to eat the cake when this is done. I receive a text; it’s from Kenneth, it says “Don’t forget to hide your essenceJ”
You see at this point, we were fairly adept at our skills, we had time to practice and since we were homeschooled we never had to worry about any other sort of social life, instead we both practiced raising the dead, placing wards, harnessing the energy of spirits around us, as necromancers we are in constant touch with the spirit world, we can always see and hear spirits and they constantly talk to us, sometimes it’s a battle just to stay sane, but usually we can just drown them out, there’s many things we can do with spirits, one is that we can lend them energy to help them manifest, this is how you come across ghosts and poltergeists, another things we can do is use them to channel energy from the spirit world, this allows us to have a near infinite pool of energy, energy that we can do hundreds of things with.
The reason Kenneth told me to hide my essence is that as we found out before; just the mere essence of a necromancer can snuff out small amounts of energy like a flame. I send him a text back “I know, I know!” he always takes me for an idiot, smug git. He goes in to blow out his candles, as I see the breath about to leave his lips, the house blew up.
© Copyright 2016 MrInsomniac. All rights reserved.
Book / Humor
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