Simply upon looking into your eyes,

My knees quiver,...

Breathless

By Kayla Mariah Christiansen

"Simply upon looking into your eyes,

My knees quiver,

My cheeks turn flushed,

You leave me breathless.

Your sweet voice,

Your gentle touch,

Your loving eyes,

Your strong embrace,

All leave me breathless.

Time is unpredictable,

So hold me,

Love me,

Caress me,
Cherish me,

Be with me,

Before we both really are,

Breathless."


Submitted: March 12, 2013

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Comments

milmax

very good rythmic style thank you

Tue, March 12th, 2013 1:46pm

Author
Reply

Thank you.:)

Tue, March 12th, 2013 7:25am

RaeBlair

Read it like a soft, beautiful country song. Very nice :)

Tue, March 12th, 2013 7:05pm

Author
Reply

I'm glad someone got that. Thank you so much! :)

Tue, March 12th, 2013 3:30pm

Lindsey Renea

Written very well. :)

Thu, March 14th, 2013 1:29pm

Author
Reply

Thank you. :)

Thu, March 14th, 2013 7:22am

Lisa Ayers

Romantic and beautiful! Love the last line.

Fri, March 15th, 2013 7:10pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much! I had some inspiration. :)

Fri, March 15th, 2013 12:27pm

ashi17

Romantic.... Loved it :))

Fri, May 31st, 2013 1:29pm

Author
Reply

Oh wow thank you so much. :)

Fri, May 31st, 2013 7:24am

LittleMizOz

Oh this is so wonderful! Quite beautiful! I've been reading very good poetry this morning :D good way to start of the morning! It was beautiful and very well put together! If you have any other works you want me to read, please update me!
Yours,
Oz

Thu, June 27th, 2013 3:26pm

Author
Reply

Oh wow. Thank you so much, Oz! I need all
of the support that I can get. :)

Thu, June 27th, 2013 9:27am

Revel Blackry

I don't really 'do' poetry, I am here on your request. I like the end of this, it is beautiful. I'm sorry I can't be more useful, Poetry isn't something I'm good at or enjoy.

Thu, June 27th, 2013 7:36pm

Author
Reply

Poetry is definitely an acquired taste. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my work and leave your opinion. I really appreciate your support. :)

Thu, June 27th, 2013 1:02pm

Criss Sole

I thought this was very beautiful. You were able to capture how powerful love can really be for two people. Well done.

Thu, June 27th, 2013 7:53pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very much for taking the time to read my work and even commenting. Your time is very much appreciated!

Thu, June 27th, 2013 1:04pm

Sarahh365

This was beautiful. I picked up a rhythm right off the bat and it was a really powerful description of love. Great work!

Thu, June 27th, 2013 8:08pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very, very much for your support! :)

Thu, June 27th, 2013 1:09pm

Freebird Writer

This is yet another great little poem. And it is so true, you should get all the love you can out of the people you love because one day, as you have said, they/you will be breathless. I loved this poem, so touching and moving, and just amazing.

Thu, June 27th, 2013 9:54pm

Author
Reply

Oh wow, thank you so much! :)

Thu, June 27th, 2013 3:03pm

M K Brown

this was a sweet one and I can understand the feelings behind it. But i am not very good at feeding back on poetry so sorry i couldnt be more appreciative lol

Thu, June 27th, 2013 10:18pm

Author
Reply

Awww well thank you so much for even taking the time to support me. :) I really do appreciate it!

Thu, June 27th, 2013 3:33pm

tiger76rt

That is simply beautiful. And its been a while since i read anything that touched me as much. It was very well written i agree.

Thu, June 27th, 2013 10:45pm

Author
Reply

Oh, my! Thank you very, very much. :)

Thu, June 27th, 2013 3:55pm

Liam Strong

The ending relayed a sense of belonging to the other character, before their time runs short...your heart speaks in this poem, and its what should be speaking for all your writing...Nice work ^_^

Fri, June 28th, 2013 2:09am

Author
Reply

Thank you very much! I do try my hardest to put my heart into every piece of mine. Every poem I write has always been inspired by what I am currently going through and feeling at that time. :)

Thu, June 27th, 2013 7:15pm

sparrow01

I'm not the greatest with poetry, but I did enjoy this. I sensed that the feeling was mutual between both of the people in the couple. You chose beautiful words for this poem. Awesome job!

Fri, June 28th, 2013 4:45pm

Author
Reply

Wow thank you so much for taking the time to
support me!

Fri, June 28th, 2013 11:13am

peacemaker06

Nice! all the trappings of love right there and "yes" time is unpredictable, so make the most of it until we are breathless! great stuff! breathless as in death but also with loves kiss, great use of words ")

Fri, June 28th, 2013 6:15pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much! :)

Fri, June 28th, 2013 11:17am

melinda sue henry

It's beautiful! I like flow and how you used short, simple lines, and yet they portrayed so much emotion into them!
-melinda XD

Fri, June 28th, 2013 6:57pm

Author
Reply

Wow thank you so much for your support! :)

Fri, June 28th, 2013 12:09pm

Coralie

This was really sweet and simple. I'm pretty sure everyone has felt this way at least once before. Perfect poem, and easily relatable. Great job!

Sat, June 29th, 2013 12:25am

Author
Reply

Thank you so much!

Fri, June 28th, 2013 5:27pm

Km2

I agree with my friends, Mrs. Bradbury, Criss, AirLionHeart, Rebecca, MK Brown and Dino, lol, on this one. This one also was beautiful and powerful in its simplicity. Very well done. I agree this one almost reads like a song, perhaps country, hehe. I also agree that this one was touching, moving, sweet and full of feelings. And lastly as Dino has said, yes time is unpredictable. So we really have to make the most of what we can, while we can. Thanks again, for yet another really great poem. Do keep up the good work and always keep writing. Take care, madam. :o)

Sat, June 29th, 2013 12:38am

Author
Reply

Thank you so, so much!

Fri, June 28th, 2013 5:48pm

DreamALittleDreamOfMe

This is truly beautiful! Well done!

Sat, June 29th, 2013 4:24am

Author
Reply

Wow thank you so much!

Fri, June 28th, 2013 9:42pm

DragonSlippers

Ah, that was so lovely! Toward the end it really picked up pace and then ended so elegantly, leaving me feeling 'breathless' with that last line. Beautiful work. I loved it. :D

Sun, June 30th, 2013 10:18am

Author
Reply

Oh wow thank you very, very much! :) Seeing
your comments really does make my
mornings!

Sun, June 30th, 2013 8:29am

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