The Wingman

Reads: 249  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 1

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic

Chapter 1 (v.1) - The Chapter in Which the Story Begins

Submitted: June 17, 2010

Reads: 159

Comments: 1

A A A | A A A

Submitted: June 17, 2010



April 22nd, 2009. It was a day like many others. It started out especially normal for one person in particular- young child genius Stephen McElwen. He woke up, not particularly feeling like P. Diddy that morning, brushed his teeth, changed his clothes, and did the many other redundant tasks that lined his morning. He then got onto the bus to go to Jonas Salk High School, and looked out the window. He saw something out the window. He saw a large sign reading "Come To Buddy's Gasoline And Flammable Items Warehouse! 430 South South Street!"

It was after seeing this sign that Stephen made the decision that would change his life forever (Or at least for a couple months)... He was going to get a girlfriend. Please note that this had nothing to do with the Flammable Items Warehouse. It just happened to come to him at that point.

Now, I would like to take this moment to point out that third sentence in the first paragraph. Specifically the phrase "Young child genius Stephen McElwen." For this phrase strictly implys that Steve, along with being young, is what we non-genius people would call a "Nerd." Nerds, are typically not sought after by members of the opposite gender, especially during the adolescent stage. This means that if Steve came up to you and, knowing only that which we know about him now, claimed "By the end of this week I am going to get a girlfriend!" we would either: a) Throw him in a dumpster, or b) Cast off his ramblings as complete bullshit... and THEN throw him in a dumpster.

This, minus the dumpster part, is the reaction that Steve's friends had when he had told them of his plans. "Dude, you're not going to get any girls..." said Frank, the video-game-guy/best-friend (Because all "Nerdy Guy Gets The Girls High School Romance" stories have one), as he sat back playing on his handheld gaming system with dual-screens that was most definately NOT a DS (Don't sue me, Nintendo).

"F-Bomb's right..." said Pete, usually the optimist of the group, "The chances of you getting with any girl who lives in the surrounding area are about four-hundred-seven-fifty-two to one..."

Steve sat with his back to the rest of the cafeteria, for they were sitting in the back corner. He sighed, seeing that his friends weren't going to be any help to him. "First off, you made up those statistics. And secondly, I feel that I could get any girl that I wanted to, I just need to plan out the situation thouroughly beforehand, allowing me to appear calm in the face of danger, and giving me plenty of opportunity to think of something 'Funny' to say..."

"Dude," Frank said, "You wouldn't know funny if it bit you on the ass..."

Pete stood up and slammed his hands on the table, glaring at Frank seriously. "Don't even JOKE about something like that! I was mauled by funny just the other day on the way home from school! It bit me in places where you wouldn't believe! The ass would be the least of his worries in a funny-attack!"

"Sorry..." Frank said, apologetically, "No disrespect."

"It's alright..." Pete sat back down, "I'll be fine... But funny-attacks are serious business. I may never be able to bear children now." There was a moment of silence as Frank and Pete looked down at the table solemnly.

After a second, it seemed like the whole room had died down. Suddenly, Steve broke forth from the silence, "OH! I get it now! He was responding to your musing about funny 'Biting me on the ass' byimplying that in fact funny HAD bitten him on the ass, and then went on to attack the groin area! Thus making it humorous!"

Frank just stared at him for a moment. He seemed to be tearing up. "You're a lost cause, Kid..." He went back to eating his mashed potatoes for a minute. He spun the fork around in them, looking up occasionally at Steve. "Alright, listen. I dare you to ask someone of my choosing out right now. You think you can pull it off?"

"I sure can!" Steve said proudly, "Just point the lucky girl out!"

"Alright...." Frank said, looking around the lunchroom. He looked through all the 'Zones' of high-school popularity. There was the sporty zone, which comprised of jocks and their girlfriends. There was the zone that was made up of the LMFAO party-people who all had really long hair. There was the zone of the 'Normal' people who didn't fall into the other zones. And of course, there was their nerd-zone. "That one..." Frank eventually decided, pointing to a girl from the LMFAO zone.

"Fine!" Steve said, looking at her for a second as the gears in his head spun around, hatching an idea of how to approach her. After a second, he turned back to Frank. "What should I ask her?"

Frank sighed. "Ten seconds and you're already lost for what to do... It doesn't matter what you ask her to, she's not going to accept. Just go over there and say something to her so that I know you're serious about this and are not just fucking with us."

"Alright, gosh..." Steve said, standing up and pushing in his chair neatly. He walked away from the safety of his own zone and ventured out into a land of fear and apprehension. A land between this land and the land we think. Between our reality and the cruel lie that is life. Into... The Twilight Zone. Okay, not really, but I couldn't resist the urge to make a reference. After what seemed like hours (It was actually, like, 23 seconds. The cafeteria wasn't that big.) he arrived that the girl's table. "Um...H-Hello..." he stuttered.

She didn't hear. That's what happens wihen you mumble, kiddies. (This aside has been sponsored by Concerned Parents Against Teenage Mumbling.)

"Hello," he said again, louder this time.

The girl turned to face him. "Oh, hello," she said kindly, "CanI help you?" Steve had a glimmer of hope when she hadn't said something along the lines of "What do YOU want, you OUTSIDER of the ZONE..." or anything else with unnecessary CAPS added to every other word. He felt he might actually have a chance and that Frank would have to put his money where his foot is, or however the phrase goes.

"H-Hello, I'm Stephen..." he said, reaching out his hand to shake. The other people at the girl's table (There was a considerable amount more of them than two...) stopped what they were doing and looked at him. "W-What's your name?"

"Hey there, Stephen." the girl said, shaking his hand, "I'm Cindi."

"I-I-I was wondering..." Steve continued, moving his arm up and down slowly and robotically, "If... You could... Go somewhere... With me... Sometime... Maybe..."

Cindi let go of his arm and looked at him. "Really?" she said, looking up at him, surprised that someone was asking her out like this with no prior warning. Despite what you might believe from watching those shows on TV and whatnot, not all high school girls get asked out every ten seconds. "Well, I'm flattered," she said, "But I'm going to have to decline. I'm sorry." Never before had Steve seen someone turn someone down so kindly.

He half-smiled kindly, "It's... Okay, I guess." he said, "Umm... Do you think we could talk sometime though? Like, just to get to know eachother?" Steve felt that he did want to get to know this girl more, seeing as how she was so polite to him. Please note that this is not in any way going to be important later on in the story. It's not. Seriously.

"Sure." Cindi smiled.

"Well, bye..." Steve said, waving and walking away. He felt so awkward.

The following is a description of what happened to both Steve and Cindi after that incident: Their friends laughed at them for a minute, one of which cracked a joke about Taylor Lautner (Don't ask. It made sense in the context), and then the bell rang. The two proceeded to get up, and walk to their next class.

Steve's next class just so happened to be Social Studies, and lunch for that day was going to be the last he would see of Frank and Pete, for Frank had to leave early to catch a doctor's appointment, and Pete usually left class early to catch his bus, coupled with the fact that none of them had the same class periods for the afternoon.


Haha, not really. But how crazy would that be, huh?

Anyway, after that, the day was rather uneventful for Steve. He went through his classes, gave a monologue on the physics of football for Language Arts (People slept during his performance.), and then caught the bus to go home. After he got home, he argued with his mother for a while about why they called the after-game show for their local baseball team, the Huckleberries, "Hucks LIVE!" even though the entire game, along with the pre-game show is 'Live' as well. He then prepared his own dinner and walked up to bed.

As he was laying down, he looked out his window. He saw something.

No... Not a sign to Buddy's Gasoline and Flammable Items Warehouse... He saw the first star of that night.

He sighed and looked up at it. "Star light, star bright... First star I see tonight... I wish I may, I wish I might, and all that jazz... I want a girlfriend... I just wish there was a girl who loved me... Oh, and Mom doesn't count." He turned around and went to sleep.

And that, dear reader (Just kidding, I don't really know you well enough to call you "Dear"), is where it all began.

© Copyright 2017 ThepureLight7. All rights reserved.


Add Your Comments:


Booksie 2017-2018 Short Story Contest

Booksie Popular Content

Other Content by ThepureLight7

Popular Tags