Ever since I enrolled in high school, I have always been a lone wolf; a silhouette among the crowd. I thought of school not as a place for learning, or a place to make friends, but as a war zone. Interacting with people seemed to be an easy way for them to find my weak point, wait till the right moment, and stab me while I'm not paying attention. I thought that people were just blocks in my path and that I just needed to sneak around them. So I isolated myself. I didn't speak to anyone; I didn't interact. I just did what was expected and went on my way.
And I liked it that way.
I didn't get hurt, and no one else got hurt. It was like an unwritten contract among myself and everyone, that I was to not be messed with, and if they followed that rule, I would not mess with them.
I don't mean to say that I didn't do well in my studies. I made pretty good grades and did everything to the best of my ability. I spent my free time dived into books, mostly manga, and I seemed to live more in my imagination than in reality. I had read any genre imaginable, from action, to thriller, and even a few yuris too, but by far, my favorite genre was romance. Maybe it was my lack of romance in my life, or the fact that love just seemed to be such a faraway thing, that sparked my interest in the genre.
There was one manga in particular that I read that changed the way I thought about love. It was a story about two girls who, one day out of the blue, became friends. After hanging out for a while, one of the girls discovered that she was really in love with the other girl, but instead of telling her about it, she tried to hide it from her. Then she finally confessed her love, kinda, and the other had no idea what to do. After a bunch of misunderstandings, mishaps, and drama, the two girls finally fell for each other and became the happiest girls on the face of the planet, in my opinion.
The two characters in that manga became my obsession for so long. I even went into a depression for a while, and thought about suicide a few times, but I got over it after a few months. Even now, when I think of those two girls and their unconditional love, I feel my heart wrench. Just the thought that somewhere there was a love as pure as theirs, made me want to be in their place more than anything!
But this was my secret. If I were to tell anyone, I was sure that they would just laugh and shake their heads and say "Wow, you really are a creeper. You need to go to the mental hospital!" being that I am a guy, and I wish I was in a girlxgirl relationship.
And then, like my wish that i had wished for for so long was heard, there was the fated day... The day that would change my life... The day I met Manami Wakahisa for the first time.
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Book / Romance
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