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Joshua

Chapter 20: Little Kids Are So Clueless

I keep Lily in my arms and hold her tightly, afraid of losing her as well as my little sister. Lily stays still in my arms and I hear her sobbing quietly like I am. I look over the top of her head at my still little sister. She has turned pale but still looks like the cute little girl that I’ve always loved.

Images of her playing dolls with Stephanie come to my mind. Then images of her dressed up like a princess and her making me wear a tiara and pretend to be a frog and then turn into her prince. Now, Ali will never get to find that prince of her own who will make life worth living. No, instead she got an evil witch who killed her just to get my father to do something that is no longer in his control.

A nurse comes in and lays a sheet on top of Alison’s motionless body. Suddenly, I feel like the walls are closing in on me and I can’t breath. I jump up, pulling Lily with me, and run outside. Lily tries to keep up next to me and I skid to a stop once we are outside and standing to the right of the hospital doors. Lily looks at me with a worried look. I search her eyes but images of Ali laying so still keep clouding my vision.

So, I grab onto Lily’s waist and push her against the wall of the hospital. I move so quickly that she doesn’t even have time to react. I cup her face in my hands and crush my lips against hers. I kiss her urgently and she kisses me back once and then pushes me away.

“Josh? What are you doing?” she asks in a confused voice.

“Just kiss me! Distract me!” I growl. Her eyes widen and I press myself up against her. I kiss her with such passion that she has no choice but to kiss me back. I pull on her bottom lip gently and she moans into my mouth, making me squish her between the wall and my body even more. My hormones immediately make me lustful as trace my tongue around Lily’s lips, begging for an entrance. Her lips part instantly and I feel the sweet taste of her mouth mixing with mine. She moans again and my whole body trembles with excitement. I smile against her lips and then kiss her again. I drop my hands to her waist and pull her hips to mine. I somehow manage to move closer to her and she trails her hands down my back making me shiver.

Then she ruins it all. She puts her hands in between us and shoves me back weakly. My eyes pop open and I look at her with a dumbfounded expression. She avoids my eyes and my guess is that if she meets my gaze then she is going to go back to making out with me. I keep my hands on her waist and rest my forehead against hers. Her breath catches and I smile because I know that she is going to give in.

But she pushes me back again and takes a deep breath. She looks up and her eyes meet mine. “What are you doing?” she says and she tries to make her voice sound strong but it fails.

“What does it look like I’m doing? I’m kissing the most amazing girl ever,” I reply. She smiles and she starts to step closer to me but then backs up again. I frown when she doesn’t move into my arms.

“I mean, your family needs you and all you want to do is make out with me,” she explains. Since she is already against the wall I step a small step closer and she can’t back away.

“Is that a crime?”

“Um, no. But you are using me just to distract you. We can kiss some other time but right now you need to be with your family,” Lily argues. I roll my eyes and step closer to her again and lean in to kiss her but she pushes my face away weekly. I narrow my eyes at her and she smiles weakly. I let my shoulders drop in defeat and I nod to show her that she is right. She grins at me and walks forward to wrap her arms around me in a warm embrace.

As I wrap my arms around her the reality of everything comes crashing down on me. Now that I’m not focused on making out with her, images of Ali’s motionless body fill my mind. I squeeze my eyes shut and try to rid my head of the images but they just get more vivid. I quickly open my eyes and clutch onto Lily. Tears threaten to escape my eyes but I blink rapidly, refusing to let any fall in front of Lily.

My phone starts vibrating obnoxiously in my pocket. I ignore it and let whoever it is leave a message. But then Lily’s phone starts ringing and some Justin Bieber song starts playing. She pulls back and smiles at me before pulling out her phone and answering it without looking at the caller ID.

“Hello? Um, yeah he is right here,” she says into the phone and then hands it to me. I look at her curiously and she shrugs. I put the phone to my ear and my dad immediately starts yelling.

“Where the hell are you? You leave the room and scare your mother and I, and then you don’t answer your phone. Don’t you think we have enough to deal with right now? We don’t need you running off,” he exclaims loudly.

“Sorry but I needed some air! I’m just outside the hospital with Lily!” I reply in a harsh tone.

“Don’t use that tone with me. Why don’t make yourself useful and go pick up your sister at school? I called the office already and they told her that she is leaving early. Get your butt over there and pick her up. But don’t tell her anything,” he says and then hangs up. I hit end angrily and shove the phone at Lily.

“I bet you could hear everything,” I mutter as I turn my back to hear as I try to take a deep breath to calm down.

“Um, yeah. Don’t let it get to you, Josh. He’s just stressed out and upset. You both are,” she says in a comforting voice and puts a hand on my arm. I nod and she steps next to me and laces her fingers with mine. I look down at our intertwined hands and let out a deep breath.

“Do you want to drive? I don’t think I’m in enough control to,” I mumble.

“I would but I can’t.” I look down at her cast and nod. Damn cast. “We could just take a taxi,” she suggests.

“No thank you. I’ll just drive.” I start walking at a slow pace. Lily keeps up easily and stays by my side. I help her into my car and then walk over to the driver’s side. I start the engine and speed out of the parking lot. I try to clear my thoughts so I can drive to the elementary school.

I pull in front of the school with an emotionless expression on my face. I start strait ahead and take deep breaths. I know that the second I see Stephanie I’m going to picture her as Alison since they look so much alike. I have to be ready and prepared so Stephanie doesn’t find out. Dad told me not tell her anything.

“Do you want me to go in and get her?” Lily offers.

“Would you? I just want a minute,” I reply. She nods and leans over the counsel in the middle of the seat to give me a quick peck on the lips.

“Okay. I’ll be right back.” She climbs out of the car and walks up to the front of the school. I sink into my seat and rest my head on the headrest. I rub my eyes and try to take deep breaths. With the car dead silent and only the sound of my heart, I feel very alone. It hits me that Ali is really gone forever. I finally allow myself to break down and let a few tears fall. I bury my face in my hands and sob quietly.

My phone starts ringing and I pull it out just to see who is calling. It’s Lily. I push the green button to answer.

“Yes?” I say and my voice cracks.

“Um, we are on our way out. Just wanted to give you a heads up,” Lily says into the phone. She must have known that I was going to break down.

“Thanks.” I hang up and quickly dry my eyes with my hands. I turn on the radio quietly and I can’t believe the song that is playing. It’s “Dead” by Chemical Romance. I sigh heavily and turn off the radio once again. I look up and I see Stephanie running towards the car with Lily following behind her laughing and smiling. I put on a smiling face and open the door for my little sister.

“Hi, Josh! Can we go get ice cream?” she exclaims as soon as she gets in the car and closes her door. Lily climbs in and looks at me. She is smiling but in her eyes I can see worry. Her eyes search mine and I don’t know if she can tell that I had been crying.

“Um, she’s been asking if we could go get ice cream since I walked into the office,” Lily explains. I look at my little sister and she is smiling widely, and totally clueless.

“Sure, why not,” I answer. Stephanie starts laughing and acts really hyper. I stare strait ahead and Lily talks to her about random things.

“Lily, why is the sky blue? It should be pink!” Stephanie asks. Normally I would have laughed at my little sister but I’m just so out of it right now.

“Um, I’m not sure, Steph. Maybe a bird painted it blue one day because that was his favorite color,” Lily offers.

“Well, then I’ll get another bird to paint it pink,” Stephanie says in a determined voice. They keep talking and I tone them out. I pull into a parking spot at Baskin Robins and Stephanie jumps out of the car. Lily and I climb out and we all go into the shop. Lily and I both know immediately that we want one scoop of chocolate and one scoop of cookie dough in a waffle cone. I pay for our cones and give Stephanie a five dollar bill so she can get whatever she wants.

Lily and I sit down at a table and I like my ice cream and stare past her. I feel Lily watching me so I focus my eyes on her face. “Are you alright?” she asks.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You didn’t sound fine on the phone earlier,” Lily replies.

“Yeah, but I’m fine now,” I mumble. Lily nods and reaches across the table to give my hand a gentle squeeze.

“I hope so.” She tries to take her hand out of mine but I squeeze it and lace my fingers with hers. She smiles down at me and then leans across the table to give me a quick kiss.

Stephanie comes running up with a waffle cone filled with chocolate ice cream that is covered in gummy bears, sprinkles, Oreos, and more gummies. “Think you got enough there?” I tease her. She stares down at her ice cream and thinks about it before shaking her head.

“The man didn’t put enough gummies on,” she wines. I laugh and ruffle her hair. We finish our ice cream and then I drive us back to the hospital. Stephanie plays I Spy with Lily and I. When I pull into a parking space at the hospital I call my dad to let him know that we are there. He says okay and Stephanie looks at me curiously. I smile at her and we all climb out of the car. I walk next to Lily and slide my arm around her waist. Stephanie skips ahead of us and I start to panic about how she is going to take the news.

“Don’t worry, Josh. Everything is going to be okay,” Lily whispers in reassurance. I nod and when we walk into the hospital my mom and dad are sitting in the lobby. They both stand up and walk forward to meet us. Dad’s eyes are clear but sad. Mom has stopped crying but her eyes are still red and cloudy.

“Mommy! Daddy!” Stephanie exclaims and runs forward to hug them. They both embrace her and smile at her. Dad glares up at me as he straightens after he hugged Stephanie.

“What took you so long?” he asks me in an angry tone.

“Stephanie wanted to go out to ice cream so we went to Baskin Robins on our way here,” I answer. He glares at me but stops when Mom puts a hand on his shoulder.

“That was very sweet of you, Josh,” Mom says in a tired voice. I smile at her weakly and clutch onto Lily tighter for more support. Mom turns to Stephanie and bends down so she is her height. "Stephanie, we need to talk to you.


Hey guys!!! I'm super sorry about the long wait but as some of you may know, I've been really busy. But I'm working hard on getting caught up with everything and on updating finally cuz I'm ready to be back in the Booksie world. lol. Sorry if this chapter wasn't very good but I'm running on four hours of sleep right now and it is midnight so I'm kinda tired. But please comment and tell me what you honestly think and I'd be happy to return the favor now that things have calmed down. Thanks and I hoped you liked the chapter! Let me know! :D *Violet*


Submitted: July 07, 2010

© Copyright 2022 Violet Moon. All rights reserved.

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Halfmoonba

glad ur back :)

Ibwonder how steph is gonna take the news...update soon!

Tue, July 13th, 2010 3:17pm

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Thanks so much! :D It feels good to be back. lol. Yeah, the next chapter should be interesting. lol. Will do! Thanks so much for reading/commenting! :D

*Violet*

Tue, July 13th, 2010 3:26pm

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