Sundays Are Always The Worst

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Editorial and Opinion  |  House: Booksie Classic
Everthing and anything that spews out my mouth

Submitted: July 25, 2009

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Submitted: July 25, 2009

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Sunday 26th July 2009, 04:11
To whoever may read this I apologise for the following: my staggeringly bad spelling which seems to have worsened over the last 2 years of studying purely science, my somewhat untactful way of going completely off of subject and finally for what is inevitably going to happen i.e. me prattling on about living is what has to be said a sadly ordinary life and probably a little too much about boredom. However, firstly I shall introduce myself my name is Anonymous King. As an aspiring 8 year-old I had hoped that I was royalty, but unfortunately my dad informed me in a rather proud fashion (goodness knows why) that it was something to do with village leaders and banquets...whatever it was, it was a little less than I had hoped for. Anyway moving on, I am currently 18 years of age, have finished my A Levels (sigh), have no university place, no job, no friends it would seem  and am currently taking up residence in North London, Barnet, a quiet suburb where the last major incidence I can remember happening is a raging bull escaping down the high street. I have been admittedly forced into a gap year where I had hoped to a sort of Stephen Fry-esque adventure could happen, however living in this dank existence I am wondering if I shall ever make it out of bed before 12pm. Well, this is not a good way to start, so let me list the good things I currently have...I have good health for starters which I consider to be quite an achievement considering 18.1% of 2-15 year old girls are morbidly obese and one in every 250 people are anorexic in the UK. I have a nice middle-class residence big enough to fit my super-king bed into considering there are 380,000 homeless citizens in the UK. I have 2 cats, 2 guinea pigs, a mouse and a recently deceased fish to fuel my animal affections considering 15% of people are allergic to cats and dogs in the UK. I have a family who provide for me and just paid for my week trip to Portugal. Oh but this is the kind of crap that Miss World might start spouting I am bloody thankful, but to be honest I need to find something else to build my life on. Growing up is a cruel thing I have discovered and so this is why I have truthfully started a record of events that occur in my life. People write autobiographies when they are older, wiser and reflecting back on life or something to that effect so now it’s time to write a current, gossiping, rumouring, untactful and maybe even a little tasteless account of life on how the ordinary being can see it. Basically to hell with this celebrity culture I’m sick of seeing Cheryl Cole parade her skinny little arse around in her luxury lifestyle and the nation falling in love with the idealistic beings. Let’s just tell it like it is....


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