10 reasons I’m not going to school.
1.I didn’t do my home work, and every one else has.
2. At lunch you can either queue in the tuckshop for half an hour, or listen to Spiky Stevens do his armpit serenade.
3. I can’t find my lunchbox, and I can’t risk sending out notes because it’s a Barbie one.
4. Ronald Fork (also known as Fork the Dork) has me as a target for kiss-chasey.
5. Yesterday Cassandra Mills swears she saw something wriggle in the sweet-corn soup in the tuckshop.
6. Ever since the great egging prank last year, Mrs Papadopoulos has been snooping me out.
7. I think I have malaria. Honestly! It only looks like a cold!
8. Last week, when the teacher told me she found my drink bottle, I said, “Yes, mum.”
9. I’m sharing a desk with Marty Rockefeller, and every time I put my hand over his side of the desk, he whacks it with his ruler.
10. I didn’t do my home work, and … oh, I already said that one? Well, uh…did I mention I have a mild case of malaria?
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