Wrong or Write?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Writers, to be blunt, can be sad, weird little people. They're also pretty awesome to know. Read these facts about nutty writers and gasp!

Submitted: January 26, 2009

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Submitted: January 26, 2009

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1. Writers often have a strange sense of humour. Italian poet Pietro Aretino went to a play, and laughed so hard that he fell off his seat and smashed his skull. And apparently, the joke wasn't even funny! British novellist Algernon Charles Swinburne was a comedian, too. He would often dack his friends (pull down their pants to reveal their underwear) and liked to play Truth or Dare. He hated losing at it, too, so he'd agree to jump into ice-cold Lochs and eat turds. He also hosted a party, and made an entrance via sliding naked down the banister. Smooth move, Algy. 2. Writers often have this weird thing about death. The author of much beloved poem The Lady Of Shalott, Lord Alfred Tennyson would sit in graveyards as a child and make up stories about the corpses, deducting things from their headstones. Dante Gabriel Rossetti was so depressed when his wife died that he buried his life's work in poems in her coffin. Later, to get money, he changed his mind and dug them all up. They were bestsellers. Virgil, a Roman poet in 71 BC, swatted a fly, and felt so guilty he demanded that the court give him the death sentence. And the Scottish Lord Byron drank wine from a human skull. Okaaaaay.... 3. Writers sometimes like animals. Gerard De Nerval, a French author had a pet Lobster called Luchi, who he took out for walks on a ribbon. He also claimed that it talked to him. Dylan Thomas often thought he was a dog when drunk, and his friends would encourage him to growl and chase cats, while Dante Gabriel Rossetti (read 2 for more) was rumoured to have a private zoo, which had zebras and armadillos inside. 4. Writers aren't always model citizens. Roman writer Cicero made up a naughty poem about the roman ruler, Mark Anthony, so Mark Anthony chopped off his hands so that he could never write again. Percy Bysshe Shelley was jailed for two months for tying a cat to a kite, and flying it. Apparently, he hated cats-perhaps he should get to know Dylan Thomas!-and would spit at them if he saw them. Scottish Robert Leighton wrote against the church, so he had his ears and nose cut off , was branded on his back, and was whipped by the church. Yeowch! 5. Writers always get the good lines. Especially when dying! Here are some witty last words; Author of \"The Time Machine\" H.G. Wells was dying of malaria, and when his nurse came to check on him, he said gruffly, \"Go away, I'm bloody fine!\". He died twelve minutes later. Noel Coward had four dogs, and said, \"Goodnight, my darlings, i'll see you in the morrow.\" He had a heart attack on the way to his bedroom. Lytton Strachey grumbled, \"If this is dying, I think it an almighty bore.\" It WAS dying. And, although he wasn't a writer, I still think these are funny last words; Soldier William Erskine jumped from a house to the pavement, and said, \"Now why the heck did I do that?\"


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